Bob Hearts Abishola

Previously on Bob Hearts Abishola...

Nigeria will be good for you.

I will miss you.

You have the best of both worlds.

Six months with your father, and six months with me.

This is so much better than my first wedding.

Mine, too.

["Olo Mi" by Tosin Martins playing, lyrics in Yoruba]

Did we just lose power?

Welcome to Nigeria, Bob.

Up Nepa!

Eh-eh! Why are we going through downtown?

Listen well well.

You should be on I-94. No wahala.

What?

Stick to 94.

"Johnny Just-Come" over here.

I see my country has rubbed off on you.

It's my new favorite place.

It's where I married the love of my life, and I found out

I could wear the hell out of a dashiki.

It does suit you.

You know, the wedding was not how we planned it,

I think your dad liked me. He even hugged me goodbye.

That is one more hug than I have ever gotten.

Come on.

My mother said, when I was born,

he shook my hand.

I am so tired, I just want to go to sleep.

The best part of every trip is getting home to your own bed.

My own bed.

Nice and firm, help out my back.

So soft I can sink into it.

My light cotton sheets.

My heavy, weighted blanket.

Like sleeping on a cloud.

Like sleeping in a cozy grave.

You know, we have our whole lives to sleep together.

What are you saying?

Abishola, my wife, would you do me the honor of sleeping

in your own bed tonight so that I can sleep in mine

and spread out like a starfish?

Oh, I will.

I love you so much.

Eh-eh, two stops, Uncle.

Uncle?

You want me to call you something else? 'Cause I will.

E karo, Auntie and Uncle.

Did you spend the night here? Yes.

Without Bob? Yes.

What did you do?

Was there a fight? Did you hit him?

No. Bob and I just wanted to spend the night in our own beds.

Oluwa mi o.What will the neighbors say?

The neighbors will not know.

They will when she tells them.

Am I supposed to talk about the weather?

My niece's marriage is falling apart.

Abishola,

you understand that we care about you very much.

I do.

So know this comes from a place of love.

Leave this apartment and never come back.

Do not make us spend money on changing the locks.

It is just one night. Maybe two. I slept so soundly.

Call the locksmith.

There's the happy couple.

Welcome home. Thank you.

I'll warn you, it's a lot different

knowing you can't leave.

Where should I put this?

Anywhere you want.

Okay.

How come she gets a lamp? What?

When you forced me to move in,

I wasn't allowed to bring any personal effects.

You didn't let her bring anything?

I let her move into my home. I built you a gym!

I didn't ask for that torture chamber.

Your torture chamber is one room.

Mine was my whole childhood.

Give it a rest, will ya?!

Please stop fighting.

What do you mean? Yeah, we're just talking.

I'll let you two settle in.

Honey, I'm so happy you're here.

So am I.

If you need me, I'll be in my cell.

My yard time is up.

I'm the one in prison.

I'll see you at dinner!

We're having steak! Again?!

Let's get you unpacked.

Here you go.

"Welcome to the Number Two Club"?

Husband number two. Same as us.

That is the card I signed?

Yes. You got a dead husband and a serious boyfriend.

You're an honorary member.

Do not put me in your failure club.

You two are divorced,

while my dear husband was tragically taken from me.

"Dear husband"? You hated him.

But I suffered through it to the end.

Which is why I will be going to heaven,

while you both are... iffy.

Well, I'm happy for you.

I am happy for me, too.

I never thought I would get married again.

He wooed you with socks.

What woman can resist that?

And now we are building a home together.

Is there a prenup? No.

Then it really is your home.

Doesn't get more domestic than this, huh?

Next we'll be getting a dog.

We are not getting a dog.

Never say never.

Never.

Here it is. This is the couch I wanted.

Wow. I know.

That's why we had to get here

before someone else snapped it up.

Well, looks like we beat the rush.

Isn't it elegant?

Sure. That's one word for it.

You have to move back.

What do you think?

I kinda feel like a toddler.

You don't like it.

No, it's not that I don't like it.

It's just maybe we could look at something

that's more traditionally... sittable.

Elegant.

Stuck the landing!

Hold on, what do we have here?

Now, yours may be elegant,

but this one has cupholders.

I have always dreamt of a couch like this.

You know, when I was 23,

I studied for a semester in Morocco.

I lived with two friends over a café

that had something similar.

Okay, now, somebody was thinkin'.

Tell me more about that place.

It was beautiful.

The owners knew I could not afford much,

so they would let me sit with one coffee for hours,

just watching people.

Ah...

Bob!

Coffee, Morocco. I'm listening.

The holes were not in this wall when you moved in.

That is where I hung the picture of you and Auntie.

I see.

You never smoked, painted or had a cat in here, correct?

Uncle, you know I did not.

Uh-huh.

This is for you.

My recipe for ogbono soup.

Ah. You said you would only give this to me on your deathbed.

No, I said after death,

I would tell it to you in a dream.

But I want you to have it now. So that you and Bob

can enjoy a family meal in your new home.

You and Uncle have been such a blessing.

I don't know what I'd have done if you hadn't let

Dele and I stay here.

I cannot thank you enough.

You do not have to. We are your family.

Here is your full security deposit.

Uncle, no... Eh...

Let him do this.

The wall damage is superficial.

And besides, after I plaster over it,

it will be like you were never here.

Thank you.

You are a wonderful niece...

and an even better tenant.

All right, uh, let's set it right there.

Ah, this is a nice couch.

I am sorry your wife is making you get rid of it.

Oh, no, she's not making me. I wanted to shake things up.

Oh, it was kind of her to let you think it was your idea.

It was my idea.

Yes. And it was my idea

to let my wife have both closets

while I keep my clothes under the stairs.

Kofo, back me up here.

I am sorry, Mr. Wheeler, but I barely know anything

about you and your wife.

He is still upset we did not get to attend your wedding.

Again, I am sorry about that.

No need to apologize.