Dirty Ho (爛頭何)

SHAW BROTHERS (HK) LTD. A SHAW STUDIOS PRODUCTION

Master!

Oh, please, sir. Don't worry, don't worry.

Are you having a good time, sir?

Oh, yes. Come on.

Please. I'll tell you. Just a minute.

- What's the matter? - (Man 1) What's going on around here?

Choi Hung, Choi Hung! Come on!

Quickly!

Hurry up! Mr. Ho is waiting. Go in!

What took you both so long, huh?

Sorry.

- Sorry for being so late. - Hmm.

Mr. Ho, don't be mad.

They're here already. Let's forgive. Sit.

Mr. Ho, let's drink together.

Do forgive me for coming so late.

You can punish me if you want.

- What did you say? - Go on, then. Have some fruit.

Er, I'm not mad about that. We're just fed up with you waiting it for us.

- Yes, yes. Right. - Long time.

Come on. Have some.

Hm. See how delicately the tree is being trained.

Very good.

And this vase, an oval shape.

Hm. Very good. Ming Dynasty.

Very rare.

Where's Choi Hung?

- Madam! - Mr. Wang, what can I do for you?

Where's Choi Hung?

Oh, I'll go get her. She'll be here soon.

Right, now, how can I admire my precious antiques

with all you girls running back and forth?

- Madam? - Uh-huh?

I've booked the Fei Cheng room already.

Damn it! I can afford to book that room, too!

I know that. It's just Mr. Wang...

Mr. Wang, he has, er...

What? You're implying that I can't afford it, then?

Oh, not true!

- Yes, you are. - No! No!

He's got money!

- Hm? What is it? - Come on. Drink.

You just have to pick up the gold bar from the wine cup

and drink the wine.

Then you can have the gold bar. And then you can go.

Huh! My!

- Oh! - (Laughter, cheering)

Real gold!

Thank you!

Who wants to drink the last two cups, then?

- (Women clamoring) - I can!

- (Woman 2) What about me? I'd like to! - (Woman 3) I can do it.

They're still not here.

Mr. Wang, very sorry.

Mr. Ho is giving away gold bars in there.

- (Gasps) - Gold bars?

Why is he giving away gold bars?

Choi Hung, she only has to drink the wine.

And then she can get a bar of gold that weighs five taels.

- (Girls) Oh, Mr. Wang, can we...? - Er, just sit down.

A gold bar is only five taels.

This is money.

You girls can guess how much each one is worth.

How can I guess without seeing it?

- Oh, let me see it. - Ah.

I'll tell you.

Some are worth ten taels. Some are 15.

And some of them are 30.

There's only one that's 50.

Oh!

We'll see who's the lucky one, if you can get the 50 tail.

- Oh! - Wait a moment.

This sort of game, you have to play with some more people.

Oh, I understand. I'll get more girls.

You two must come with me.

Mr. Wang is giving money drabs away. Each worth a lot of money.

Not as good as gold!

You're both idiots! He has ten taels and 50 taels, as well!

Fifty? Wow!

Come on, girls! Let's go!

- Twenty. - Mine's 15.

Twenty-five taels! Oh!

Only ten?

- What have you got? - I've got thirty!

- Me, too! - I've got 20.

- What about you? - Come on.

- Just ten. - (Girls chuckling)

Mr. Ho! Please, don't! The girls!

There's still 50 taels. Please continue.

- (Girls) Oh! - (Ho) Hold it!

Listen, the highest value of each of those drabs

is only 50 taels.

- (Girls gasping) - Jewelry!

You see, this real pearl necklace here,

it's worth 100 taels.

- (Girls gasping) - A hundred?

- (Ho) I also have jade rings. - (Girls gasping)

- Agate. Coral. - (Girls) Ooh!

- Sapphire and a lot of others. - (Girls gasping)

I think you'd all like to have them.

Oh, yes!

- So, come with me. - (Girls) Yes!

Wait a moment! Don't go yet.

I also have gems and jewelry.

Huh? Ah-ha.

So much!

Stand aside, please. Stand aside!

I give an overture in the same trade here.

You're right. I'm in the same trade.

And may I ask, where do you conduct your trade?

Oh! (Chuckles)

Not Peking.

This is my first Canton business trip.

Don't you know the rules? Is that how you do business?

As long as I'm not selling junk goods, I'm not breaking the rules.

I object. You're obviously a troublemaker.

Somebody ought to teach you a lesson.

Is that your way of doing business? That you start by fighting?

With people like you I always start by fighting.

Our way of conducting business is done by talk.

Go to hell!

Please stop fighting!

Surround the boat. Don't let 'em go! Come on!

Stop fighting!

Constable, sir, what's the matter?

It's reported of the two jewelry cases that were here,

one of them was stolen goods.

Stolen?

Who owns the bigger box?

It's mine.

This box belongs to you, does it?

- Is it yours? - (Men) No, no, no!

- Is it yours? - No, no, no!

No one admits it? Then come with us!

It's also mine!

These two cases are they yours?

- That's true. - You?

- My friend, you're drunk. - You...

They're mine.

These two cases are brought from Peking.

Never mind about that! Take him!

Hold it!

I'll prove they're mine.

PROVINCIAL COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF

Look at this certificate.

- Yes, sir. - That's all the jewelry I have.

- Don't search. - Sir.

Huang Chin-chin is a genuine jewelry merchant.

Right, no more searching. Let's go.

This merchant seems a pretty important guy.

Wait one moment.

- What is it? - My friend over here, he's very drunk.

What's wrong?

Also, he's got a lot of valuables with him.

He's drunk. It won't be safe for him.

Would you please see he goes home safely?

Yes, sir.

- Let's go. - I'm not that drunk!

Let go! This belongs to me.

My dear friend, you're really drunk.

This jewelry, I'll take care of it. Take him away!

- I'm not drunk! - Come on!

- (Ho) Let me go! I don't need... - (Clamoring)

- (Overlapping chatter, cheering) - (Chuckles)

- Come on! - Bastards! You lousy prick!

How could he do that to me? Just don't let me see him again!

- I'll kill the bastard! - What?

- Hey, I'm sober now. - So quick?

It's the cold air. Woke me up completely.

- Are you really sober? - 'Course I am!

Just there, that's my home there.

- Are you sure you'll make it? - 'Course I'm sure.

See how steady I walk.

See that? See how steady.

Hey, friend, you can leave me now.

What are you staring at?

Come on!

Hey, I told you not to drink so much wine!

That liar from Peking.

Just because he has contacts.

Made a fool of me.

Just wait till I see him again.

Hey, hey. Good wine here.

Yes. Aye, sir.

Wine from Canton.

There you are.

There you are!