Danish Pastries (I Jomfruens tegn)

In the Sign of the Virgin

My dear child! My dear child! I've got good news.

Because of Venus's orbit

the board will send it's best inspector to pay a visit. A Mr. Armand.

It has to be clean everywhere

especially in the kitchen where there...

Tauretta! Tauretta!

What in God's name are you doing to Virgine's rectum!?

My God, that is disgusting. Shame! Shame! Shame on you!

Aah!

Aah!

Aah! That was the spot. Well, now you know how a perfect Taurus ought to behave.

That's rude and licentious. Licentious! Go and sit down.

You too. Quick!

The world is a nasty place, Tauretta. What a shame.

You should concentrate on your studies and stop such filthy behavior.

I don't understand how you

could fall for such filthy pleasures

when there is so much purity.

I'll lock you in the basement where you'll read a book in peace you little bottom dweller.

Damn it! Who is it?

A little boarding-school Lolita. I don't understand these young harlots.

It's hard enough to find somebody to "blow the rusty trombone. " Let her in.

C'mon inside. - Could I... uh... get some?

Well, there's "get some" and "get some" It depends...

What do you think we are doing here? Running a child welfare office?

Does the headmistress know what you kids are up to?

It's called democracy on the job? Well God help us.

It's been two weeks. Rufo, where can I get a hairy man with a "big delicious one"?

Couldn't you think of something else?

We only have the barber right now. And he's always busy.

Can I take a peek?

You'll have to be quiet as a little mouse. He doesn't like to be disturbed.

Watch out that you don't catch your thumb.

Shut up, Gine

No you shut up! Old fart!

Shhh!

Tauretta, you whore!

Gine! Gine!

"Nulpolitterorden"

This astrological urban legend

that for hundreds of years has predicted world history and the holy spirit's destiny.

In just a few days we'll be exposed to these powerful astrophysical side effects...

It all has to do with Venus's orbit.

The last time Venus was closest to the earth, in the year 1769

they found some disturbing erotic behavior

among the natives in Tahiti.

All this because of Venus's orbit and its connection to Jupiter.

And... during the upcoming orbit

there will be a new target on earth.

And in the middle of this target is...

"Nulpolitterordens" boarding school for young, beautiful... delinquent girls.

We have to protect these young virgins from the temptations of the universe.

And therefore, we're sending you to the small village Petit-Bois.

I'll do everything I can to stop it, sir.

Our chemist has developed a new kind of hormone preparation

that will reduce any erotic temptations.

Mr. Armand, it's your mission to go to Petit-Bois

and make sure every one of those young virgins gets this hormone preparation

before Venus reaches it's critical position.

I'll do everything in my power, sir.

You're first, my little Napoleon. And you, my darling Josephine.

Now, we'll see what will happen to you in the near future... or hours. Ha ha...

This is very exciting, if I may say so.

It could really fuck up someone.

My wonderful hormone preparation. My lifework.

Nobody will be immune. Even grandpa will get fucked up.

I'll do it.

I'll do it! I'll try this one immediately.

If it works on Miss Troelsen, it'll work on a dead person.

Miss Troelsen!!!

- Yes, professor? - My sweet little Miss Troelsen...

Have I told you about Venus's orbit?

Oh, the professor doesn't have to tell that filthy story again.

That wasn't my intention. I'm so so sorry.

But later today I'll be traveling to the place where I can really investigate

this phenomenon. This orbit.

You shouldn't do that sort of investigation. You should do something more meaningful.

Miss Troelsen. This is terrific.

- Oh dear, I mean scientific. - Yes, as my uncle always said...

I'll try to sell my miracle preparation.

And could you do me a favor? Please?

It should taste really good. If everything

is in order. I've always put a great effort on the...

. . on your... taste buds.

- The professor is always so nice. - It's nothing, please take a seat.

Now you'll see. Here you go, little Miss Troelsen.

Bottoms up. Let it all go down.

Well, little Miss Troelsen, how does it taste?

It...

Ah, it's exquisite!

Yes, I knew it.

I feel very, graceful...

Ah, my little professor! Ah, my little darling!

My little Venus professor. My little professional.

I think I've gone crazy... I think I'm dick crazy...

- Whip it out. Show me your needle dick! - But wait a minute, Miss Troelsen

My darling. My love. Look at this. Come up here.

I need that dick, professor. This is crazy, professor.

Yes, it is.

This is dangerous. Yes, it is.

Give me that cock. Give me that cock. I need to suck your cock, professor.

Get your cock over here, professor.

Remember to turn off the gas, okay?

Your ticket!

- Are you sure you're on the right train? - Petit-Bois, yes.

- Your ticket! - Wooahhahaaa, a hippie!

- Your ticket! - Yes, yes, my ticket...

That's an evil thing you have there.

Oh, it's just a clipper. For the ticket! -Thanks.

One, two, one two... One, two, one two...

Stop fooling around and sit down.

Shh!

Today we will have a visitor. Inspector Armand.

It's a great honor and pleasure for us all.

Mr. Armand isn't just a good astrophysicist.

He's a good teacher. So he's not just someone with time to waste.

I want you all... to show him nothing but respect.

What are you doing with your hands down there?

- It was itching - A real lady doesn't itch...

You've probably already noticed there's a new girl in class today.

Minet, please stand up?

Minet is going to be here, with us, for a long, long time...

She's just a young innocent girl...

And you should treat her like one.

Bye for now.

My dear, excuse me, could you please tell me where I might find a nice cathouse??

Oh, I mean... night cap house... a hotel?

- Should we send him over to Rufo's place? - Sure.

Walk further into town. Ask for Rufo's.

Hotel Rufo's, sounds interesting.

Girls... Allow me to introduce myself... Bomwitz...

Bomwitz!

Please permit me to buy you a little drink.

Yes, we could use a little devil...

Tell me, who are you girls?

We are virgins from the boarding school.

- Virgins? - Virgine.

- Capricornia. - Geminette.

Bomwitz, professor.

- What is that, washing powder? - It's just for my headache.

- I've got a headache, a bad headache... - We all do sometimes...

Stop it... it's for small... mice... I mean, it's for me...

It was...

a wonderful headache... I want to suck...

Geminette, what are you doing? But Geminette, stop... !

I knew it. Help! Help!

My bananas!

Help! Hilfe!

Geminette, stop!

Mooove!

Help! Help!

Wait! Wait!

- Help! - Wait! Wait!

Geminette...

Come.

Wait. Geminette...

Wait, wait for me...

I'll give it to you, just a second...

This is good. Wet, juicy pussy.

Deeper. Go deeper.

Deeper??

Uhh!!

Could you tell me where I'd find a place with a lot of young girls?

A place where there are many young girls.

- Real girls? - Well... young girls.

It's right up there. Ask the fat guy at the door.

Remember to use a rubber hat. Otherwise they refuse...

Rubber hat? Mighty weird.

Is this where I'd find all the lovely young and innocent girls?

Innocent? That's a good one. This is the place alright. Welcome.

Finally.

Over there.

Yes, well I have...

Well. I'm here to take a look at the young girls... and teach them...

. . how to use their skills. Well, as you see, I've got the preparation right here.

Finally the stars have turned towards us.

Wow, that's a good one. You've got to be sent from heaven.

Yes, I'm from the... Shall I... ? Uh!

I don't want to...

We'll baptize you... Slut!

No No No!

C'mon!

No!

Well, whenever you're ready...

... it's just to call... Everyone here is for your pleasure exclusively...

Is there a good mix of Virgins and Lions?

The Lions usually come from the street, and virgins. Is all this crap really necessary?

Yes, to maintain the correct astrological balance.

Well, that's logical. If you just think about it for a moment.

- Oh, and there must be a few Sagittarius as well. - That's a good one...

Sagittarius, yes. To maintain the proper balance. It's right here in the book.

Balance? Nah, we just call it a three-way.

The three-way combination, right. I'm a Virgin. What are you?

I'm sort of a landlord.

But if you mean the other thing I guess I'm a Lion!

Then you're good with Geminis?

Geminis? That was a long time ago.

We'd like to have a pair of those. But they're hard to get these days.

Geminis are very intelligent.