Remo Williams: The Adventure Begins

'There's a steal! Knicks try to call for time.

'Mike Cooper fires down court to Kareem.

'He's ahead of the field, lays it in. Lakers by seven.

'This is Marv Albert from the Forum in LA.

'The Knicks in big trouble as they move to the front court.

'Cummings takes the one bounce, a flip for King. It's batted away!

'Magic Johnson on the steal. He goes baseline.

'He's trapped, throws back out to Worthy,

'Worthy with a head fake. Now the jumper. It is good!

'Ten seconds left. Lakers are burying the Knicks.

'The Knicks have come back from the dead before but not tonight...'

'2L-16, Tac2.

'Come in, 2L-16.

'Respond, 2L-16.

'Sgt Larry says you owe him 50 bucks on tonight's game,

'and he'd be happy to take your money on the Knicks any time.'

Come on! Give it to him!

Where is it? Come on!

It's mine and I want it now.

Look at this. Is he crying?

Freeze!

Hands out of your pockets, away from your body.

Suck wall!

Get your feet back and spread 'em!

All right, wider. I said wider!

You ought to be ashamed of yourself, picking on a guy half your size.

- Nice shot, kid. - Good shot, Joey.

Come on, man.

Hit him!

Don't move.

Don't even breathe.

We have come to mourn and honour

not only the passing of a friend but of a fine police officer,

an officer who was an example to us all.

Samuel Edward Makin died as he lived, defending the American way.

That is why I feel more pride than sorrow,

for Samuel Makin made the ultimate sacrifice.

He did so willingly and no man can hope to do more.

His body may be returned to the earth,

but his spirit will live forever.

We, your fellow officers, salute you, Sam.

Your duty done, may you rest in peace.

Ready!

Aim! Fire!

I was shaving you.

- Where am I? - Don't worry. Everything will be fine.

That's not me. What the hell have you done to me?

We did some work on you. Just your face.

- Thank you, nurse. - You better have a good reason.

We did.

- You were ugly. - Who's "we"?

You've been recruited by an organisation that doesn't exist.

Sam Makin is dead. Some nasty man shoved him into the East River.

I'm a pretty healthy corpse.

The operative word is "corpse".

You've got a new face, new fingerprints, even a new name.

Williams. Remo Williams.

A lot of thought went into it.

We needed someone. You were the best we could find.

Decorated cop, ex-Marine, no family, no commitments.

If I'm the best you can find, you're in deep shit.

Who the hell are you? FBI, CIA, Salvation Army?

Who we are, are the people who've got you by the balls, Remo.

Besides, we need you.

Our cops are corrupt, our judges bought, our politicians up for sale.

Everywhere you look, slime is on the loose.

You'll be the Eleventh Commandment: "Thou shalt not get away with it."

You're the guy that set me up at that warehouse, ain't you?

Nice job.

The name's MacCleary. We'll get to know each other.

Enjoy the fruit... Remo.

Remo? Jesus!

There you go, Mr Mossier. You're gonna be as snug as a little old bug in a rug.

Hey, where the hell you going with my ambulance?

Turn left at the next intersection... Remo.

Don't get any cute ideas, Remo.

National Bank?

Are you opening an account for me?

Let's go.

What do these things do? Keep track of your wardrobe?

I thought they could make those things small.

These are the small ones.

- Come in, Mr... - Williams. Remo Williams.

Good evening, Mr Williams.

I'm Harold Smith. I'm the head of the organisation that just recruited you.

Dumping me in the river and reshuffling my face is recruitment?

Yeah. It works. Sit down.

Come on, my boy. I know your ribs are hurting.

Sit down and make yourself comfortable. I'll tell you about the way we work.

I've seen how you work.

You run black-bag operations, kidnap people,

beat the shit outta them and no one holds you accountable.

- Oh, we're accountable, Mr Williams. - Let me guess. To the president.

Yep. And five of 'em before him. I've lost track. I don't even vote any more.

Sorry to disappoint you. I'm voting with my feet.

Now you wanna sit down?

I'm only going to say this once.

This is a wonderful country but our legal system doesn't work the way it should.

I'm talking about people who roam the halls of power with impunity,

who corrupt and subvert the principles our constitution exists to uphold.

He already gave me the Gettysburg Address.

Has he? Here's another one.

"Guard, protect and cherish your land,

"for there is no afterlife for a place that started out as heaven."

Charles M. Russell, Montana, 1926.

1926? That's ancient history, Dad.

- Computer said you were a smart ass. - Heard of computer error?

Not this one.

Take a look at that innocent little box, my boy.

It's hooked to all those computers you saw downstairs.

Every scrap of processed information in the United States comes through here.

If it's out there, I can find it. Helps us keep track of the bad guys.

I can find out the temperature of your ass in that chair if I really want to know.

But it won't do everything.

That's why we've got you. You're gonna help remove some of the filth in there.

I like that. That's nice.

It's a whole lot nicer than kill, destroy or terminate with extreme prejudice.

- That's what you're really talking about. - He's got it, Mr Smith.

That's exactly what we're talking about.

Well, suppose I say no.

Then you're a dead son of a bitch.

And we already got a coffin.

How big is this organisation?

Just the three of us.

Mac here will get you cleaned up and briefed.

You start work Monday night, Mr Williams.

Here we are.

Nice pad, huh, Remo?

First hit?

No big deal. You'll get used to it.

Nothing like throwing in a man at the deep end.

What's this guy done that's so special?

Come on, Remo. We run on a need-to-know basis. You know that.

Don't take any chances. This guy's a killer.

Remember. In, out, like a duck mating.

- Where are you gonna be? - Right behind you.

Hey, how do you open this?

Speakee English?

Does a nightingale sing?

Yeah, well... How do you get outta here?

The same way you came in.

No good. There's a guy outside who wants me to knock off your boss.

I am here alone.

There is no one upstairs.

Oh, look. Let's not make any trouble for each other.

All I want to do is get outta here.

It is too late for that.

Hold it! I'll kill you if I have to.

I'll show you chopsocky, you sawed-off little runt.

Well, Chiun? What do you think?

He's very slow.

His reflexes are pitiful, poorly co-ordinated.

He's in wretched physical condition,

impetuous,

and clumsy.

He move like a baboon with two club feet.

However, there is a feeble glint of promise in his eyes.

I think I can do something with him.

Good.

'George S. Grove, born Albany, New York, May 10, 1933.

'BA Electrical Engineering, Clarkson College.

'Served two tours, Fly Sergeant, Korean conflict.

'In 1962, founded Grove Industries Advanced Weapons Technology.

'Current projects: CD-18 surface-to-air missile.

'HARP: High Altitude Reconnaissance Probe,

'prototype for the Star Wars programme.'

'Investigation, corporate tax evasion, 1979.

'No charges filed.

'1981, suspected bribery, procurement defence contracts.

'After the disappearance of investigating officer Murray Benton,

'no charges filed.'

'There were three witnesses alleged to have seen the murder of Benton.

'No charges were filed for lack of evidence.

'They disappeared too.

'If the company can't get anything on Grove, then you know he's good.'

You'll have terror for breakfast, pressure for lunch and aggravation for sleep.

Your vacations will be two minutes when not looking over your shoulder,

and if you live to draw a pension, it'll be a miracle.

Are there any disadvantages?

Hell, I'm lucky I've lasted this long.

Tell me something. Can you dodge bullets?

Nowadays only if they come real slow.

- Do I really have to live with him? - Chiun's not crazy about the idea either.

He says you smell like hamburgers.

Top floor. See you.

Hey, MacCleary.

If this is another set-up, you won't live to collect that pension. I guarantee it.

Didn't I tell you? We don't use that bang-bang stuff.

Your mind and your body become your weapon.

That's what your new pal Chiun is gonna teach you.

OK, so you caught me with a couple of lucky shots.

But I gotta hand it to you, that bullet-dodging number wasn't bad.

And I like the little thing you did with the gun.

You move like a pregnant yak.

Sit.

Breathe.

Breathe? Come on, you've got...

Silence! A fool chatters, whilst the wise man listens.

Breathe.

Wait. Is this the kind of training where we sit around for ten years