Ghostbusters

All right. I'm gonna turn over the next card.

I want you to concentrate.

I want you to tell me what you think it is.

Square.

Good guess. But wrong.

Clear your head.

All right. Tell me what you think it is.

Is it a star?

It is a star. Very good. That's great.

Okay. All right.

Think hard. What is it?

Circle.

Close. But definitely wrong.

Okay.

- All right. Ready? - Yeah.

All right.

What is it?

Come on.

Figure eight.

Incredible. That's 5 for 5. You can't see these, can you?

- You're not cheating me, are you? - No, I swear they're just coming to me.

Okay.

- Nervous? - Yes. I don't like this.

You only have 75 more to go, okay? What's this one?

It's a couple of wavy lines.

- Sorry. This isn't your lucky day. - I know.

Um...

Wait... Um...

I'm getting a little tired of this!

You volunteered, didn't you? We're paying you, aren't we?

Yeah, but I didn't know you were gonna be giving me electric shocks!

What are you trying to prove here, anyway?

I'm studying the effect of negative reinforcement on ESP ability.

The effect? I'll tell you what the effect is. It's pissing me off!

Well, then maybe my theory is correct!

- You can keep the 5 bucks. I've had it. - I will, mister!

You may as well get used to that.

It's the kind of resentment that your ability is going to provoke in some people.

Do you think I have it, Dr. Venkman?

You're no fluke, Jennifer.

This is it. This is definitely it!

Did those UV lenses come in for the video camera?

And that blank tape, I need it, the one you erased yesterday.

- Will you excuse me for a second? - Sure.

I'm right in the middle of something, Ray.

I need a little more time with this subject.

Could you come back in an hour, hour and a half?

Peter, at 1:40 p.m.

at the main branch of The New York Public Library on Fifth Avenue,

ten people witnessed a free-floating, full-torso, vaporous apparition.

It blew books off shelves from 20 feet away

and scared the socks off some poor librarian.

I'm very excited. I'm very pleased.

I want you to get right down there, check it out, and get back to me.

No, Peter, you're coming with us on this one. Spengler went down there.

He took PKE valences, went right off the top of the scale.

Buried the needle. We're close on this one. I can feel it.

I can feel it. We're very, very close.

I have to go now, Jennifer, but I'd like to work with you some more.

Perhaps you could come back this evening, say at...?

Eight o'clock?

I was just going to say, "8:00?" You are a legitimate phenomenon.

As a friend, I have to tell you,

you've finally gone around the bend on this ghost business.

You guys have been running your ass off,

meeting and greeting every schizo in the five boroughs

who says he has a paranormal experience. What have you seen?

Of course, you forget, Peter,

I was present at an undersea, unexplained mass sponge migration.

Oh, Ray, the sponges migrated about a foot and a half.

- Oh, you're here. - Yeah, what have you got?

This is big, Peter, this is very big. There's definitely something here.

Egon, this reminds me of the time you tried to drill a hole through your head.

- Remember that? - That would've worked if...

I'm Roger Delacorte. Are you the men from the university?

Yes. I'm Dr. Venkman. Dr. Stantz. Egon.

Thank you for coming. I hope we can clear this up quickly and quietly.

Let's not rush things. We don't even know what you have yet.

I don't remember seeing any legs,

but it definitely had arms, because it reached out for me.

Arms? I can't wait to get a look at this thing.

Alice, I'm gonna ask you a couple of standard questions, okay?

Have you or any member of your family

ever been diagnosed schizophrenic, mentally incompetent?

My uncle thought he was St. Jerome.

I'd call that a big yes.

Uh, are you habitually using drugs, stimulants, alcohol?

- No. - No, no. Just asking.

Are you, Alice, menstruating right now?

- What has that got to do with it? - Back off, man. I'm a scientist.

Ray, it's moving. Come on.

Look!

- This is hot, Ray. - Symmetrical book-stacking.

Just like the Philadelphia mass turbulence of 1947.

You're right. No human being would stack books like this.

Listen! Do you smell something?

Talk about telekinetic activity. Look at this mess.

Raymond, look at this.

Ectoplasmic residue.

- Venkman, get a sample of this. - It's the real thing.

Somebody blows their nose, and you wanna keep it?

I'd like to analyze it.

- There's more over here. - I'm getting stronger readings here.

This way.

Come on.

Egon, your mucus.

This happen to you before?

Oh. First time?

It's here.

A full-torso apparition. And it's real.

So, what do we do?

Could you come over here and talk to me for a second, please?

Could you just come over here for a second, please?

Right over here. Come here, Francine. Come here.

- What do we do? - I don't know. What do you think?

Stop that!

We've gotta make contact. One of us should actually try to speak to it.

Good idea.

Hello.

I'm Peter.

Where are you from? Originally.

Shh.

All right. Okay. The usual stuff isn't working.

Okay, I have a plan. I know exactly what to do.

Now, stay close.

Stay close.

I know. Do exactly as I say.

Get ready. Ready?

Get her!

- Did you see it? What was it? - We'll get back to you.

Wait!

"Get her." That was your whole plan. Get her.

- It was scientific. - I just got overexcited.

But wasn't it incredible, Pete? I mean, we actually touched the etheric plane.

You know what this could mean to the university?

Yeah, it's gonna be bigger than the microchip. Ray, I'm very excited.

I wouldn't say the experience was completely wasted.

According to these new readings, I think we have an excellent chance

of actually catching a ghost and holding it indefinitely.

Well, this is great. If the ionization rate is constant for all ectoplasmic entities,

we could really bust some heads. In a spiritual sense, of course.

Spengs, you serious about this catching a ghost?

I'm always serious.

Egon, I'm gonna take back some of the things I've said about you.

You... You've earned it.

The possibilities are limitless. Hey, Dean Yeager.

I trust you're moving us to better quarters on campus.

No, you're being moved off campus.

The Board of Regents has decided to terminate your grant.

You are to vacate these premises immediately.

This is preposterous. I demand an explanation.

Fine. This university will no longer continue

any funding of any kind for your group's activities.

But the kids love us.

Dr. Venkman, we believe that the purpose of science is to serve mankind.

You, however, seem to regard science as some kind of dodge or hustle.

Your theories are the worst kind of popular tripe.

Your methods are sloppy, and your conclusions are highly questionable.

You are a poor scientist, Dr. Venkman.

I see.

And you have no place in this department or in this university.

This is a major disgrace. Forget MIT or Stanford now.

They wouldn't touch us with a 10-meter cattle prod.

You're always so concerned about your reputation.

Einstein did his best stuff when he was working as a patent clerk.

- You know how much a patent clerk earns? - No

Personally, I like the university. They gave us money and facilities.

We didn't have to produce anything.

You've never been out of college. You don't know what it's like out there.

I've worked in the private sector. They expect results.

For whatever reasons, Ray,

call it fate, call it luck, call it karma,

I believe that everything happens for a reason.

I believe that we were destined to get thrown out of this dump.

- For what purpose? - To go into business for ourselves.

This ecto-containment system that Spengler and I have in mind is gonna

require a load of bread to capitalize. Where are we gonna get the money?

I don't know. I don't know.

You're never gonna regret this, Ray.

My parents left me that house. I was born there.

You're not gonna lose the house. Everybody has three mortgages nowadays.

But at 19 percent? You didn't even bargain with the guy.

Ray, for your information, the interest rate alone

for the first five years comes to 95,000 dollars.

Will you guys relax? We are on the threshold of establishing

the indispensable defense science of the next decade:

Professional paranormal investigations and eliminations.

The franchise rights alone will make us rich beyond our wildest dreams.

There's office space, sleeping quarters and showers on the next floor

and there's a full kitchen on the top level.

It just seems a little pricey for a unique fixer-upper opportunity, that's all.

What do you think, Egon?

I think this building should be condemned.

There's serious metal fatigue in all the load-bearing members.

The wiring is substandard. It's completely inadequate for our power needs.

And the neighborhood is like a demilitarized zone.

Hey, does this pole still work?

Wow, this place is great. When can we move in?

You gotta try this pole. I'm gonna get my stuff.

Hey, we should stay here tonight, sleep here. You know, to try it out.