Banana Joe

Steady.

Oh, Joe.

Hi.

Welcome back.

What's happening, Luis?

Oh, you know, my wife gave birth to another girl.

Hey, congratulations.

I got 20 kids, all little rascals.

Because you're lucky.

Why lucky?

What can you do with a girl?

Keep trying for a little boy.

Hey amigo, come ashore.

Come up.

The drinks and cigars are on me.

Ah-uh, nothing doing, Luis.

I never set foot off my boat.

This line here, that's where my world ends.

I know.

Your boat and the village of Amantido.

You said it.

Those supplies, they ready to go?

Sure, they're all right here,

salt, flour, medicine, the whole load.

Including the red eye for Mother Tobias.

Red eye for who?

Shoot, you mean lotion, shampoo, don't you?

What shampoo, are you kidding.

She chugged and licked the whole bottle,

said it's the greatest taste since bean brandy.

Empty dandruff, rub in well,

it's written right on it.

Writing only works if you can read, Luis.

What we need up there is a school.

Now that I mention it,

how many bananas would it take to build one?

Hey, how are you?

I'm speaking to you guys, huh?

Come up, come on the two of you, up here.

Oh boy, you're getting big.

Hey Paquito, been a good boy, huh?

Hi, hi.

Hello, how are you.

Now, let's see what we have in here.

A yellow tee shirt.

Take it easy.

There's something for everybody.

That's for you

and this is for you.

Oh yes, oh yes, oh yes, oh yes.

This is it.

This is paradise on Earth.

Oh, bananas.

Love bananas.

Mm.

Martinez.

You finish it.

Forward.

Follow me, follow me this way.

Ah, what have we here, a village.

This is where it should be, ah yes.

And full of little niño simpático.

Coochie, coochie.

Amiable and tale of low-cost labor,

a primary requirement for the success of other

non-packaging and processing plant,

right, Martinez?

Hey, what's happened?

Who turned off the water?

Papa Joe, Papa Joe, come quick.

Strangers arrive in fast boat.

They're over there.

Papa Joe, you have to come.

Come quick.

Ah-huh.

To my left.

Ah-huh, that's it, perfect.

Good, good.

Now, let's see.

That's where we'll set up the warehouse

with the completely automated,

ta ta ta ta ta,

banana processor

and over here, an ultra modern sterilizing unit.

Then there'll be packaging,

ta ta ta ta ta,

labor lake shipping,

et cetera, et cetera, et cetera

and over here.

Over here is where I am.

Who are you?

Banana Joe.

Love it, Banana Joe, great name.

This is for you,

a special doublemint flavor.

You savages go crazy over chewing gum,

remember that, Martinez.

A little to the left.

To the left, that's it.

That's it.

That's it, that's it.

I didn't hear your name.

I represent the mulitnational food conglomerate

that has bought the concession of this island to cultivate,

process and ship bananas to every corner of the globe.

We pick the bananas around here

and I take them up river to exchange them

for the supplies we need for this village.

Get it?

So, you're an American.

One of those guys leftover from the Peace Corp.

I want to make sure we understand each other, amigo.

You're setting up nothing on this island.

Get it? Oh.

I don't want to be a nosy Parker

but do you have a license,

a concession from the government to pursue

a commercial venture here?

License, concession, what's that?

He's just sighting the law.

Anybody trafficking in bananas must have a license

from the government.

Oh, I get the picture.

He's got the picture.

Yeah, I get the picture and you're getting the boot.

You're polluting the environment, so get going.

We are representatives of progress, civilization.

We represent, Mr. Torcillo,

the patron of Porto Grande.

Goodbye.

I'll take my bag and my maps.

I swear you'll pay for this

or my name's not San Banito of the Torcillo corporation.

If you're gonna do it kid, do it right.

Nobody crosses Mr. Torcillo and gets away with it.

Torcillo residence.

This is Moreno.

Let me speak to the boss.

Just a minute, I'll see if he's in.

Hey boss, Moreno's on the phone for you.

Let him hold on.

Include the bananas as well.

Okay, Mr. Torcillo.

Send it off to Time Magazine and suggest they

put it on the cover,

Jose Torcillo, the banana king.

A banana a day keeps the doctor away.

Hello, Moreno.

Well, what's the story in Amantido.

You've broken soil?

No but I almost broke my head, old chap.

You should have been there yourself.

A big ape kicked us off the island.

Who kicked you off the island?

A guy called Banana Joe,

a local napoleon, only he's an American

and more savage than the savages.

This is your wake up call.

This is your wake up call.

4:50 p.m.

4:50 p.m.

This is your wake up call.

4:15 p.m.

4:16.

Rise and shine, come on.

Up we get,

you too.

Want to sleep you whole lives away?

Hey, that one there ain't mine.

Who are you?

We are yours, Joe.

You big Papa in the whole world.

Alright, good kid.

Go into the shower,

then a big plate of fried bananas for everyone.

Bananas again, no.

You don't want fried bananas, I'll do them roasted.

We don't want bananas.

You kids know why I'm so strong, super strong, right?

Yes, yes.

Cause I never passed up on bananas.

Vamos, vamos muchachos.

Would you look at that.

Bautista, you got new umbrellas and a clean shirt,

you must be making money, huh?

I know, I know, it's your bananas, Joe.

There's no better bananas in the whole wide world.

Here, have one on me.

Hey, gracias.

It'll do you good.

Come on, come on, keep those bananas moving.

Hurry it up.

Hey, Sergeant.

Here, come here a minute.

There's the guy Torcillo told you about.

You know what to do, huh?

Vamo niños, I want to get back before nightfall.

I'll take care of it right now.

Next.

To the right.