Snakes on a Plane

Go, get outta here.

Go!

They say the higher you aim,

the farther you fall.

Fuck you, Eddie Kim.

And look at you now, Mr. Prosecutor, huh?

Not so high and mighty anymore.

Well, that's a noble gesture.

I'll make sure to tell your son

all about it.

The reason he gets to grow up without a father

is because of how goddamn noble he was.

Then again, I was raised by a single mom and...

I didn't turn out so bad, huh? Whoo!

Clean this up.

I'm going back to LA.

Let's get the hell out of here...

and find that guy!

This is Mi Jung Lee reporting live

from the Kaena Point area.

Details remain sketchy in the brutal slaying yesterday

of Los Angeles prosecutor Daniel Hayes,

who was vacationing in Hawaii.

Hayes has been in the news lately

for his high-profile pursuit of reputed mobster Edward Kim.

Mr. Kim's representatives have issued a statement

of condolences to the Hayes family

and claim absolutely no involvement

in what they call a hideous act

of violence. The ongoing saga

in the criminal investigation

of Mr. Kim involves charges of murder, racketeering

and police corruption at the highest levels,

both here in Hawaii and on the mainland.

Thank you, Mi Jung.

We'll be sure to check in for any updates

as they become available.

Do as I say, and you live.

Stay flat against this wall. Don't even breathe.

Go go go, that way!

Black car, go!

What the hell is going on?

You witnessed a murder and didn't tell anybody.

Why didn't you call the police?

The news said they were corrupt, so I figured they'd be in on it.

Smart kid.

Who are you?

I'm Agent Neville Flynn, FBI.

Pleased to meet you, Sean.

I gotta tell you, Sean, I'm getting a little tired of all this garbage

you've been feeding me.

We know you were there. Your prints are all over it,

so stop insulting my intelligence.

You witnessed a murder. You have a responsibility.

Look here, Sean.

I've been doing this for a while, so I know all kinds

of neat little interrogation tricks.

You know, good cop bad cop,

reverse psychology, stare-down contests, threats.

You name it, I've done it.

But why don't we leapfrog all that bullshit,

save ourselves a lot of aggravation and time,

of which there is close to zero,

and I tell you the truth?

Truth is I'm not worried about you

if you testify.

But I am worried about you if you don't.

What... what if I didn't see him clearly? I mean, I wouldn't be...

What did I just tell you about saving us aggravation and time?

He knows who you are!

That's why those people were at your house trying to kill you.

And make no mistake,

Eddie Kim will kill you,

if you let him.

Last week I was planning a surfing trip to Bali.

Now...

now you make it sound like I have no choice...

Oh, no no no no no no no no no. You got choices.

You got tons of choices,

but there's only one correct choice:

Come with us to LA,

testify against his ass,

put him in jail for life.

Tell you what:

You sit here, think about it.

You let us know what you decide.

We'll be outside.

The white zone is for immediate in-loading

and unloading of passengers only.

So you got any requests for your final flight?

Well, just what any flight attendant wants.

Low-maintenance passengers.

Uh-huh, that would be very nice.

A'ite, ladies.

Hey, Troy, Leroy, I got this, all right? Let me sign 'em for them.

Let me sign 'em for them. Gimme that marker, son.

How you doing, sweetie? You all right? There you go.

You take care, baby. All right.

- Can I get your autograph? - You can get a little more than that.

Yeah, no doubt. Let me do this on the special for you right there.

- Mmm, yeah. Mm-hmm. - It tickles.

Mmm!

- Take care, all right. - All right.

- Will you sign this, please? - Oh yeah, no doubt, little man.

Here we go.

- Mm, there you go. - Thank you.

- Hey, yo, stay black. - Hells, yeah.

All right.

All right, y'all, God bless you. I gotta get out of here

and catch this flight, all right? Y'all take care. Catch the next album.

- We can't wait! - Yeah, all right, no doubt.

All right, look, we gotta make sure we got some more of this, all right?

- Look at the Howard Hughes of rap. - What?

What was that?

He... he said, man, can you believe this crap?

- Man, this is crap right here. - Hey, yo, come on, y'all.

Y'all messing with t-shirts and hats.

Y'all are supposed to be watching my back, son.

- Come on. - You're right, brother, I got you.

Ladies and gentlemen, South Pacific Air flight 121

- has been delayed half an hour. - Oh, come on!

We apologize for this inconvenience

and we'll begin boarding as soon as possible.

Oh, boy. It's gonna be a fun flight.

Aloha all Island Express passengers...

Five whole hours.

Do you know who's working today? I didn't get a crew list.

You know, I have no idea.

Oh my God. Here she comes. Here she comes!

- Surprise! - Surprise!

Oh!

Oh, Claire, don't go.

Last thing the world needs is another lawyer.

I mean, really, how could you leave all this?

- It's gonna be hard. - Will you take me with you?

Please.

Could we ask for Bruno from Simply Corporate?

Elena, by we, I mean you.

No, not all drivers are the same. That's the point.

The last thing I need is some guy going on and on

about the weather the whole way home. Get Bruno.

Mary Kate, hush.

Sorry, she gets nervous flying.

Oh, that's okay.

I understand, you know.

Do you think she'll want some Xanax?

Oh no, she's okay.

How you feeling?

Yeah, fine.

You ready for this?

Yeah.

Is that our plane?

No, every cop in Honolulu thinks it is.

Hey, come on, relax.

FBI's escorting some guy to LA.

They just took over all first class.

Are they allowed to do that?

Well, apparently FAA Section 108 states,

"If deemed necessary, they can do whatever they want."

Well, who's gonna tell the first class passengers they're flying coach?

That would be you, kid.

South Pacific Air 121.

Oh, my.

I was hoping you'd be the sky candy on this flight.

You're looking especially delicious this evening.

I love it when you demean me, Rick.

My pleasure. I gotta go fly a big plane.

- Hi, doll. - Hi there, Rick.

Isn't he smooth?

Yes, sir. I'm soaking the leis with it.

The pheromone will make these guys go fucking crazy.

Duke.

Leave it, Duke.

- Ladies. - Welcome aboard.