Um Homem Só (Um Homem Só)

Are you awake?

No.

Take your clothes off.

- What? - I'm ovulating.

I'm sleeping. If you were asleep,

you wouldn't be talking. Come here.

Wait, Aline. Can I at least brush my teeth?

No kissing. Just take your pants off.

- Ouch! - What?

Did you take a shower before going to bed?

You never let me go to bed without showering.

Ouch! My hair!

You have pulled my hair

Are you sure you want to do this?

It's either now or next month.

Come on. Take it off.

Wait.

It's not happening.

He's a real asshole, our neighbor.

It's the same thing every day.

The alarm goes off and no one sleeps.

I don't know why it annoys you so much.

Because it's a Chevette.

The alarm doesn't scare thieves away,

the car does. The alarms serves the sole purpose of annoying me.

So you think the alarm is there just to annoy you?

Do you have anything for headache?

- What did I do? - You got wasted.

I'm sorry I got home late.

I told you I was going out with Mascarenhas.

I don't give a damm about him.

The problem is you're hungover

on the last day of my ovulation, Arnaldo!

I'm asking you for the basics here.

I'm sorry.

Our marriage sucks.

Are you sure you want to have a baby?

You are my husband. It's the natural course of things.

You don't even like me.

Says who?

You. Last Sunday.

A LONE MAN

I can't stop drooling over her.

- Did I show you her picture? - Yes I saw it.

- She has blue eyes - Of course!

Isaac has blue eyes, and so do I.

- She's lucky to have blue eyes. - Yes.

Having blue eyes open doors.

What do you want, Arnaldo?

I'm sorry. I just wanted to see the photo.

- To humiliate me again? - Again?

Enough Arnaldo! You keep torturing her. That's awful!

- What did I do? - You said her daughter

looks like a sweet potato.

I didn't say that.

- Yes, you did. - When?

At the bar, after work. It was beautiful!

I turn into a different person

when I drink.

- What's wrong? - Aline.

What did that she-devil do?

Don't call her that.

You've always called her that.

But now it's different.

We're trying yo get pregnant.

"We"?

Slow, huh?

Slow and steady?

It's a smart thing to say.

What do you collect?

What exactly?

- Stories - Books?

No. Do you know those stories that

you've heard a hundred times...

But it always happens to a friend of a friend

and never the person telling the story?

- Like... - Like the guy who ate

a worm hamburger at McDonald's.

Is it real?

I don't know. That's the beauty of the thing.

- Let's drink a little more. - Let's maintain a certain posture,

you're at work.

I'm at work

celebrating that I quit my job. What's wrong with that?

What's going on?

I'm not feeling well.

Let me talk to Tomé.

- I'll be right back. - I won't take it.

You're a pain.

What are you doing?

Mascarenhas! My boss is a huge dumbass.

He's intellectually inferior to me, yet treats me like a dog

Are you crazy? What was that?

I mean it.

Mascara,

I want to tell you something,

but you need to promise me you won't tell anyone.

Who would I tell?

Come on, say it!

There is this scheme,

a clinic,

that makes a copy of a person to replace them.

- That's crazy! - I'm serious.

- How? - I'm serious, Mascarenhas.

I googled the doctor's name.

He's a foreign doctor

who deals with genetics.

It's illegal.

He is wanted.

Are you saying that you'll clone yourself?

I went through the procedure this morning.

They assured me

they'll put me inside my home tonight.

My copy.

So you called them, schedule an appointment...

You don't call them, they call you.

All you need is to put your name and phone number

in a suggestion box.

- Like in a restaurant - It's beautiful

I heard you and Tomé talking in the restroom.

He's a lunatic

Are you telling me you believe that nonsense?

What if it's actually possible to copy someone?

My life looks less miserable now.

Forget this shit. It's just an urban legend.

- Yeah. - Lf I were you

I'd get a dog.

For Aline.

Women love puppies.

She'll get attached to the dog

and forget about this pregnancy.

Until you have the guts to get rid of her.

A dog, Arnaldo?

Do you know that dogs poo?

If we had a son, you'd change the diapers.

- I get it. - What?

You think the dog will make me

forget about the baby.

I think...

I thought we could practice.

Practice?

Practice?

Are you going to put a leash on your son

and take him to walk?

Did it ever occur to you

that maybe I don't want a baby?

I'm pregnant.

"SEXUAL ORGAN"

"ENTRANCE"

"EXIT"

"SHE-DEVIL"

"BOOBIE"

"COWARD"

"STUPID IDEA"

Wake up!

Listen,

you brought this stupid dog home,

now you get rid of it.

That piece of shit pooed in my bathroom

and I stepped on it. Did you hear?

That I stepped on it? Did you hear?

You think it's funny.

You were probably laughing when

you stuck this to my face.

You owe me respect.

I'm your wife and I'm pregnant,

if you still remember.

- I'm sorry. - Sorry?

You walk around here as if you rented a room.

You don't talk to me. You're always drinking

with your stupid friend. Are you listening?

Where are you going? Arnaldo!

Hey, bro! Hey bro!

You've gotta be kidding me!

Are you talking to me? Are you crazy?

What is this alarm for?

Who would steal a Chevette?

- It's my father's car. - Calm down!

- He's a son of a bitch. - Don't talk to me like that.

My name is Cássio.

What kind of name is that?

Cássio, like the keyboard.

- He's an idiot! - You're the idiot!

Are you taking his side? Shut up!

- What's that? - Hang on,

- don't talk to her like that. - Are you going to hit me?

I wanna know if you will hit me.

Are you?

You want to hit me because you're big.

You're an asshole.

No!

What do we do with a dead dog?

I've never had any pets.

- People bury it in the backyard. - I don't have one.

So bury in a plant vase.

This is not a hamster.

Let me google it.

What should we do with a dead dog?

- I was thinking... - Look!

There is a dog cemetery.