Mulligans

Hello, Mr. Davidson.

Oh, Felix.

Another bucket of balls?

Not today. Hey, Tyler's on his way home.

Oh, is he gonna work here again this year?

Yeah and he's bringing a friend from college.

Sweet.

l'm-- l'm just gonna...

Oh, yeah.

Does he play golf too?

l haven't met him yet,

but we'll find out this afternoon.

Guess so.

Okay.

l'm... l'm good.

Oh, yeah.

Here you go.

That a boy. Thanks.

So the four of us are naked running through the town, right?

We have no idea which way to go.

And all of a sudden this Iook of terror is just like

stricken all of our faces. And it's freezing out--

Hey, Tyler, let's go.

Sorry, ladies - two seater.

First.

See if the victim is conscious and breathing.

Second.

Call for help in a loud, clear voice.

Help, Help.

And third.

lf they are not breathing, check the mouth for anything

that may be blocking the air hole -

like an apple core or something.

Hey, Birdy, why are your dollies naked?

They were swimming and Lindsay almost drowned.

Nakedness is nothing to be ashamed of Birdy,

but at the dining room table maybe they could

pop on some swim wear.

What's on your agenda, Nate?

Well, once the boys arrive l thought l'd take them

for a round of 18.

You?

Well Birdy has her swimming exam this afternoon

so I thought I'd take her down to the beach after lunch.

l saw Jeffrey's penis.

Who's Jeffrey and why d'you see his penis?

He shows it to me under the water at swimming lessons.

Hey, Dad!

Hey guys, how was the drive?

Good.

Tyler, you're home!

Oh, Birdy! Your brother's home!

l can see him.

Hi, Birdy.

You're getting so big now.

Chase, we've heard so much about you.

Sounds like you two had a lot of fun this year.

Yeah, we did.

Nice place.

Well, we just summer here.

lt's no palace, but it has the basics.

We're thrilled to see you, and l know Tyler is too.

Yeah, thrilled.

Come on in.

This is Tyler's sister Birdy.

l've got a swimming test today.

So if you need saving while you're here,

l could probably do it.

Cool, l'll keep that in mind.

And this is Mr. Davidson.

Nathan.

Of course we're adults now.

You can call me Stacey.

Hey, mom, where are we bunking?

You two are in the guest house.

lt's a work in progress.

Cool.

Listen, Birdy and l have to run off to her swimming lesson.

So help yourself and if you need anything,

just call me on the cell.

My sweet baby lamb chop, it's so good to have you close.

Okay, Birdy, Iet's shake a leg.

Let's shake a leg.

When you see Jeffrey's mother, l want you to point her out to me.

So mom has calmed down a little bit.

What about you Dad? Are you working today?

No, no. New summer's resolution.

l'm going to leave the office at the office -

18 holes a day towards a more relaxed, happier me.

Alright, you're up.

Alright, man, you just want to visualize

where you want the ball to go.

You want to get it in the hole, okay?

Now, if you can get it in on, the first shot all the better

but most guys got to work up to it, okay?

Alright.

l thought golf was a quiet game.

Hey...Nice and easy, keep it relaxed.

Ty, knock it off, alright? Let the guy play.

Good. Good.

You're, uh...good.

That's what we call that shooting blanks.

You gotta visualize the cup. Visualize the cup.

Alright, here we go.

Just remember to keep your head down because...

Aw, jeez, l'm sorry. Like father like son, huh?

Whoa, okay, wow.

Okay, you've got passion behind that but, uh...

Which is good, but let's just focus some of that energy.

Use your club to get you pointed in the right direction.

There you go.

Feet shoulder-width apart.

Nice, then put just a slight bend in the knees.

A little less.

Now just keep your head down and let the club do the work.

Better.

l'm gonna cross the tree line to my Goddamn ball.

Chase, Chase, Chase what are you doing?

You don't wanna use that.

Why not?

Well, on the fairway you want to use a club

that'll give you a little lift.

Uh, like a 7?

Too much lift. Try a 3.

Okay, man, visualize the ball going in the hole.

Nice and easy, okay?

You wanna watch that grip.

lt should be firm and loose all at the same time

because you don't want to have a wussy shot.

Seriously, coach- shut up.

Four!

Hey, whoa! What are you guys doing?

You trying to kill me?

Sorry!

l didn't mean to...

You hit my dad!

You're a big target, Dad!

Sorry!

Don't forget your ball.

You alright?

Welcome to the lake, dude.

That was chilly.

So is your sister's name really Birdy?

Actually it's Barbie, but when she was four she hated it

so much she changed it to Birdy and it just sort of stuck.

l thought you said your dad was uptight.

Yeah. Well, he usually is.

Maybe it's like a mid-life crisis or something.

He seemed pretty young to me.

Yeah, well you have to remember l'm the product

of a teen pregnancy.

My parents had me when they were still in high school.

Okay. Okay, really!

l think we should have a rule this year that maybe

you kind of keep yourself covered up, just as a courtesy.

You know like a sock or pants or a toque or a beanie -

anything, really. It doesn't matter.

Sort of a common courtesy to me, l think it will

do our relationship good and also to the neighbors.

l think they might appreciate it.

Cool?

Birdy!

Birdy! This is your mother, what are you doing?

Get away from that boy!

You two, come with me.

Mom! You're embarrassing me.

l'm embarrassing you?

l wasn't the one cavorting out in the middle of the lake

in front of the whole beach.

l suppose you're Jeffrey?

l didn't do anything!

l know exactly what you did, you little pervert.

Excuse me? Is there a problem here?

Yes, l'm handling the situation.

Well, l'd like to help you 'handle the situation'.

This is my son.

Well, that makes sense.

This little nudist son of yours has been

showing my daughter his penis.

You think that's funny?

lt's a violation of her childhood.

l wasn't showing my penis. l was showing a minnow!

Minnow. For sure.

Mom, he's telling the truth. He was just showing me a minnow.

This is unbelievable.

l don't care what we all want to call it, children of eight

should not be sharing that kind of thing.

Let's just relax. They're kids.

At this rate, not for long.

Grab your things, Birdy. We're leaving.

Bye, Jeffrey. Sorry.

Wow, what a spread.

That's why it's so hot in here. Turkey in June?

lt's our first meal as a whole family together again.

l thought it was more appropriate

than throwing burgers on the barbecue.

l like burgers better.

We can have burgers another night.

How was your golf game, boys?

Dad was playing his usual game - up on the opposite fairway.