J.D.'s Revenge

YOU'RE CRAZY. YOU'RE SUCH AN IDIOT.

YOU SAID YOU WAS GONNA LEAVE ELIJA.

FOOL.

YOU SAID YOU WAS COMIN' WITH ME!

YOU'RE SUCH AN IDIOT. YOU'RE SUCH A FOOL.

I GIVE YOU MONEY.

YOU COULD NEVER GIVE ME ENOUGH MONEY.

I GIVE YOU MORE MONEY THAN ELIJA GIVES YOU!

IF YOU DON'T STOP,

I'M GONNA TELL ELIJA THAT BABY ISN'T HIS,

AND HE'LL KICK YOU OUT IN THE STREET.

AND IF HE DO, I'LL KILL YOU.

YOU WOULDN'T DO ANYTHING.

YOU AIN'T GONNA TELL NOTHIN'!

YOU AIN'T GONNA TELL NOTHIN'!

BETTY JO!

OH, GOD!

MURDERER!

MURDERER!

MURDERER!

READY. HUP 1, HUP 2!

COME ON, COME ON!

ALL RIGHT!

OH, YAY!

NOT BAD. NOT BAD.

HEY,COME ON! NOW, BREAK... CUT IT OUT, MAN! CUT IT OUT!

I'LL KICK YOUR ASS, ALEX! YOU USING YOUR KNEES ON ME, MAN!

YEAH, 'CAUSE YOU ELBOWED ME, MAN!

YOU CRAZY! I DIDN'T DO NOTHIN'!

COME ON, AIN'T NOBODY OUT HERE GETTIN' PAID!

Y'ALL CUTTIN' IN ON MY WEEKEND TIME!

COME ON. COOL IT MAN.

I KNOW YOU AIN'T GETTIN' PAID, MAN,

'CAUSE IF YOU IS, I WANT MY $5.

COME ON, MAN. LET'S GO. COME ON.

HUDDLE UP!

YOU GUYS KICK OFF!

YOU LOOKED PRETTY GOOD OUT THERE, BABY.

YEAH, I TOOK IT EASY ON THEM.

LISTEN, I'M LATE FOR WORK.

THESE GUYS HERE WILL TAKE ME HOME, RIGHT?

SURE.

GOOD GAME, MAN.

YEAH.

AND Y'ALL BE CAREFUL DRIVIN' MY BABY HOME, NOW.

BYE.

ALL RIGHT, OK, NOW, UM, LET'S GO OVER THIS PART

JUST ONE MORE TIME TO MAKE SURE YOU GOT IT, OK?

OK. OK, GOOD.

WHAT IS THE NEXT STEP

AFTER A CASE IS ARGUED BEFORE A COURT OF APPEALS?

IT'S REVIEWED BY A BOARD THEN SENT ON TO THE NEXT HIGHEST COURT IN THE DISTRICT

IKE. IKE. WHAT'S WRONG?

HONEY, YOU WEAR THESE THINGS NIGHT AND DAY WITHOUT SOCKS, AND THEY STINK.

BABY, THOSE ARE $30 SUPERSTAR SHOES.

THAT MAY BE SO, BUT WOULD YOU MIND PUTTING THEM OUTSIDE?

IF I PUT 'EM OUTSIDE, SOMEBODY MIGHT STEAL 'EM.

HA! THEY WON'T BE ABLE TO GET CLOSE ENOUGH.

OH, THAT'S COLD.

IF SOMEBODY MAKES OFF WITH MY TRACK SHOES, IT'S ON YOU, HEAR?

I WILL TAKE ALL THE RESPONSIBILITY.

YOU HEARD THAT, SHOES. IT'S ON HER.

HONEY, UM...

HEY, LET'S KNOCK IT OFF FOR TONIGHT, BABY.

I'VE HAD ENOUGH LAW.

I HAVE A VERY GOOD IDEA.

I THINK, A NIGHT OUT ON THE TOWN WILL DO YOU A WHOLE LOT OF GOOD.

NO, CAN'T DO IT, BABY.

WELL WE DID PROMISE PHYLLIS AND TONY

WE'D CELEBRATE THEIR 1st ANNIVERSARY WITH THEM.

YEAH, YEAH, BUT--

NOW, LISTEN, IT'S JUST 1 NIGHT.

IT'S BEEN AGES SINCE WE'VE BEEN ANYWHERE.

IT'LL THROW ME OFF, BABY.

COME ON, IKE,

HOW OFTEN DO YOU CELEBRATE A 1st ANNIVERSARY?

HMM?

WHY DO I LET YOU GET ME INTO STUFF LIKE THIS?

OOH, I GUESS IT'S 'CAUSE YOU LOVE ME.

YEAH.

YEAH.

WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU, TONY?

I'M FINE, MAN.

BETTER CLOSE YOUR MOUTH, KID.

I COULD NEVER DO ANYTHING LIKE THAT. COULD YOU, CHRISTELLA?

AT LEAST NOT IN FRONT OF AN AUDIENCE.

NO, MAN. I GOT IT. I GOT IT.

I GOT IT, I GOT IT, I GOT IT.

BESIDES, YOU AIN'T DRINKING NOTHING BUT BEER.

MAN, WHEN ARE YOU GONNA LEARN IT'S MEDICALLY PROVEN

THAT GOOD GIN CLEANSES YOUR SOUL OUT?

LISTEN, AIN'T NOTHING WRONG WITH MY SOUL.

OH, "AIN'T NOTHING WRONG WITH HIS SOUL."

SARA DIVINE! JUST FOLLOW ME INSIDE!

NOW, GENTLEMEN, STEP RIGHT UP NOW.

HERE IT IS, SO CATCH THIS SHOW.

THE BEST SHOW ON BOURBON STREET, AT THE 500 CLUB.

NO COVER CHARGE. SEE THE WHOLE SHOW.

THE BEST SHOW ON BOURBON STREET.

SARA DIVINE, THE HIP HYPNOTIST.

LET'S GO.

CATCH THIS SHOW. IT'S THE BEST SHOW.

RELAX, FELLAS. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,

JUST A FEW SECONDS OF SERIOUSNESS.

I WANT TO EXPLAIN EXACTLY WHAT'LL BE HAPPENING WITH THESE BOYS.

NO. 1, WHILE THEY'RE UNDER HYPNOSIS,

THEY WILL DO NOTHING THEY CONSIDER MORALLY WRONG.

THEY WOULDN'T SHOOT ANYBODY OR HURT ANYBODY.

THEY ARE NOT ABLE TO RESPOND TO SOMETHING THEY FEEL IS MORALLY WRONG.

THEY MERELY IMAGINE WHATEVER I TELL THEM IN A BIGGER WAY.

ONE THING IS VERY IMPORTANT.

NO DRINKING, NO TALKING, NO CLINKING OF GLASSES.

YOU'LL NOTICE NO ONE'S ALLOWED TO SERVE DRINKS WHILE I PUT THEM UNDER.

THEY MUST CONCENTRATE ON THE SOUND OF MY VOICE.

THEN WHEN THEY'RE UNDER, WE CAN DO WHAT WE WANT.

WE CAN HAVE FUN AND ENJOY OURSELVES.

SO, I WOULD APPRECIATE COMPLETE SILENCE. THANK YOU.

OK, BOYS, YOU'LL HEAR ONLY THE SOUND OF MY VOICE.

YOU'LL PUT YOUR HANDS ON YOUR LEGS.

YOU WILL CHOOSE A SPOTLIGHT AND STARE AT THAT SPOTLIGHT.

AT THE COUNT OF 10, YOU'LL BE IN A DEEP SLEEP.

YOU'LL HEAR ONLY THE SOUND OF MY VOICE.

READY?

1. YOUR EYELIDS ARE GETTING HEAVY.

2. YOUR EYELIDS ARE GETTING HEAVIER AND HEAVIER.

3. YOUR EYELIDS ARE ABOUT TO CLOSE.

THEY FEEL VERY, VERY HEAVY.

4, 5. YOUR EYES ARE CLOSED.

YOU'RE VERY RELAXED, YOU'RE VERY RELAXED.

6, 7. YOU HEAR ONLY THE SOUND OF MY VOICE.

ONLY THE SOUND OF MY VOICE.

YOU'RE VERY RELAXED. YOU CANNOT OPEN YOUR EYES.

YOU WILL CONCENTRATE ONLY ON THE SOUND OF MY VOICE.

9, 10. YOU ARE COMPLETELY ASLEEP.

YOU ARE COMPLETELY ASLEEP.

YOU HEAR ONLY THE SOUND OF MY VOICE.

ALL RIGHT, BOYS, AT THE COUNT OF 3,

YOU WILL RAISE YOUR RIGHT HAND VERY TIGHT.

SPREAD THE MUSCLES IN YOUR FINGERS ON YOUR RIGHT HAND.

YOU WILL NOT BE ABLE TO BRING THEM DOWN.

READY? 1, 2, 3. RIGHT HANDS INTO THE AIR.

FINGERS STIFF. THERE'S NO WAY.

TRY TO PUT YOUR HANDS DOWN. YOU CANNOT.

YOU CANNOT. FINGERS STIFF AND SPREAD.

YOU CANNOT PUT YOUR HANDS DOWN.

YOU'RE RELAXED AND HEAR ONLY THE SOUND OF MY VOICE.

SO INNOCENT IN THEIR SLEEP. AREN'T THEY BEAUTIFUL? LOOK AT THESE GENTLEMEN.

OK, LET'S HAVE SOME FUN.

OK, GUYS, PALMS DOWN.

YOU'RE IN A HOT PLACE, A VERY HOT PLACE.

YOU'RE IN THE SAHARA DESERT,

AND YOU'RE HOTTER THAN YOU'VE EVER BEEN IN YOUR LIFE.

IT'S 105 DEGREES,

AND YOU'RE HOT, VERY HOT.

IT'S 110 DEGREES.

IT'S 115 DEGREES, AND YOU'RE HOT.

VERY, VERY HOT. 100-- FREEZE!

YOU BELIEVE THIS GUY?

HEY, WHAT ARE YOU, A STRIPPER IN DRAG?

LOVELY, LOVELY.

OK, DARLING, PUT THE 3-PIECES AWAY,

BECAUSE YOU'RE ALL IN A COLD PLACE,

A VERY COLD PLACE.

YOU'RE INSIDE A BIG, GIANT REFRIGERATOR,

AND YOU ARE COLDER THAN YOU HAVE EVER BEEN IN YOUR LIVES.

IT'S COLD.

YOU'VE NEVER BEEN COLDER IN YOUR LIFE.

NOW LET'S HAVE A BIG HAND FOR THESE TALENTED GENTLEMEN

ALL RIGHT!

ALL RIGHT, NOW.

ARE YOU OK?

YEAH,I'M FINE. BABY, PUT THESE IN YOUR BAG.

JUST GO AHEAD AND PUT 'EM IN YOUR BAG.

SO, HOW WAS IT?

FINE. I JUST SAW A LOT OF COLORS AND STUFF LIKE THAT.

LET'S GO SOMEWHERE WHERE WE CAN DANCE.

THAT SOUNDS ALL RIGHT.

LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.

YEAH, OK.

GO AHEAD, BABY, GO AHEAD.

HURRY UP. DON'T FORGET ANYTHING.

I GOT IT.

OH!

GOD!

IKE.

HEY, IKE.

WHAT IS IT?

IT'S--UH...

IT'S ALL RIGHT.

COME ON, BABY. WE BETTER SIT DOWN.

WELL, WHAT'S WRONG?

I DON'T KNOW. I GOT A LITTLE HEADACHE, THAT'S ALL.

MAYBE A LITTLE TOO MUCH BEER.

I THINK WE'D BETTER GO HOME.

I SAID IT'S JUST A HEADACHE.

ALL RIGHT, I'M GONNA GET TONY,

AND WE'RE GONNA GET OUT OF HERE.

HI. YOU FEELING BETTER?

YEAH, I FEEL ALL RIGHT.

I TOOK SOME MORE ASPIRIN.