Grandfathered

So his dad just died, just like that?

Yeah, heart attack.

He's on the phone with the hospital now.

Oh, it's so sad.

Jinx.

Do you think he's okay?

When my dad died, I watched When Harry Met Sally

for 48 hours straight,

and City Slickers for the next 72.

My dad really looked like Billy Crystal.

Here he comes.

(CHEERFULLY) Hi.

So, my dad's dead, you know.

It was a heart attack; sudden.

Oh, honey, I'm-I'm so sorry.

Where is the funeral?

You know, I can clear my schedule

for next week...

No, no, no, no, there won't be any funeral.

I mean, we didn't have much family, so...

it's fine, you know.

Jimmy, you know, if you ever want to sit and just...

Ravi, it's life, okay?

I'm gonna be just fine, you guys.

Don't worry about me; I'm good.

Let's talk about something else.

All right, so what's new?

Oh, Cinco de Mayo right around the corner, huh?

We having any taquito parties this year?

Hmm?

Really, you don't want to have a funeral?

It could be cathartic.

I'm fine.

You know, i-it's sad, yes, but...

I have no regrets.

I mean, like I always say...

it's the circle of life, you know?

Hakuna matata.

Mm-hmm, hakuna matata.

Exactly.

Look, everybody, my dad had a long life...

And...?

That's it. Vodka martinis? Anyone?

Oh, was that your dad's favorite drink?

Yeah. Not anymore.

Okay, wh-what was that?

You have so much to learn, new girl.

Jimmy Martino is not an emotionally mature adult.

Instead of mourning, he makes rash life decisions,

usually involving the restaurant or himself.

When Paul Newman died,

he put in a sushi conveyor belt and grew a ponytail.

Guys, call me crazy, but I think this area over here

needs a little sprucing up, huh?

You know what I'm thinking?

Fish tank.

What I'm seeing is sort of a...

a wide tank, like so...

maybe some sea anemones...

a sea otter here...

maybe a shark.

Oh, sharks are sexy.

I wish mermaids were real.

We don't have to decide now,

we can let it, you know,

"perk-u-late," or... percolate.

This is still better than the ponytail.

Percolate, perk-u-late,

perk-u-late, percolate.

We'll table it.

Improved By: Fidel33 Sub Upload Date: May 17, 2016

What you doing?

What-- uh, nothing.

Looks like you're putting a tiny box in Jimmy's safe.

What's in the box?

What's in the box?!

Seven, Brad Pitt, classic quote.

Seriously, color me, uh, intrigued.

What's in that ring box?

Can you keep a secret?

Bro, are you kidding me?

My soccer coach, he paid me

to sit on his lap for an entire summer...

you're, like, the first person I've ever told.

Yeah, I can keep your little secret.

Horrifying.

Okay, um, it's a ring.

I'm gonna propose to Vanessa.

What?

- Dude, that's awesome! - Yeah!

Ah, man, if her grandma is any indication,

she is gonna ripen like a peach in the Georgia sun.

When are you popping the question?

Well, you know, I was gonna do it right away,

but then Jimmy's dad died,

and I feel like I should wait a couple weeks, out of respect.

Wait, what, I'm supposed to sit on this for a couple weeks?

Nuh-uh, no, no, I can't do that, you know I can't keep a secret.

You just said that you kept your soccer coach thing a secret.

I lied, man.

I told everyone about my soccer coach.

I even made some things up.

As soon as I see Vanessa,

I'm gonna freak out and I'm gonna blow it.

Yeah, but, you see Vanessa all the time.

I'm gonna blow it!

Okay, uh...

you know, maybe it's not too soon to propose, right?

Uh, maybe my dad's feeling okay now.

- Right? - Hoo-hoo! Hi, guys!

I've been up baking all night long.

Dad, you have some flour on your...

Did I get it?

- Mm-hmm. - Good.

Listen, I'm working on a new specialty dish,

and-and I asked myself:

Is it a pasta? No.

Is it a steak? No.

What I'm doing is...

I'm taking a winter classic

and I'm bringing it

all the way back to summer, baby.

Look at this: gingerbread beach house.

- What do you think? - Hmm...

Good. I'm gonna go update the menu,

and, uh, tell me when the fish tank gets in, will you?

Guys, how do you think I'd look as a blond?

And-and do they do that surgery for men,

that-that permanent eyeliner surgery...

I wore eyeliner in a high school play,

and I got to tell you,

I made me feel very sexually free.

Hey.

We should talk about Dad, right?

Yeah, uh, he keeps sending me these crazy texts.

"Do you think I would look good as a blond?

"I'll have Annelise do a mock-up.

Here's the mock-up."

Oh, God!

He looks like Glenn Close.

Uh, we need to pull him out of this.

Right? Help him deal with his grief

i-i-in a healthier way.

- (PHONE RINGING) - Wait, um...

It's him.

Hey, Dad.

I don't think you should get that surgery.

Wha...?

Because your jawline's

already very well-defined.

- Oh, hey. - Hi.

There you are.

How was your day?

Well...

I feel like I spent most of it driving over here.

- Oh. - Who knew Santa Monica

to Pasadena counts as a long-distance relationship?

I don't understand why I'm driving so far to be with you...

Hey, screw you, jerk face!

I drove out to Santa Monica on Tuesday.

...because I want to be with you all the time.

Oops.

Hmm.

I should never talk.

Hey, listen...

I think we should move in together.

- You do? - Yeah.

Isn't it a little soon?

Maybe, but I know what I want,

and I want you, so why wait?

Look, take some time, think about it.

Okay, I'll think about it. Good.

Mm!

Ugh.

Oh, is that Billy Idol?

Love him.

- (SIGHS) - Yikes.

Oh, my God, he bought fish.

Yeah, for my new fish tank.

Fishies!

Wait a minute,

how did all you guys

get into my apartment?

An emotional intervention?

Come on! Whose idea was this?

Not yours because you're too cool.

He's right, I am.

You don't like me enough.

He's right, I don't.

And you don't like to share me,

so if this was your idea,

it'd be just the two of us somewhere...

Dolphin-watching for two in Catalina.

Leaves every hour if you still want to go.

This whole nonsense

has you two hippy-dippy nerds

written all over it.

You need help.

Mom's a therapist;

she knows this stuff.