The Battery

Go! Go! Go!!

Hey. Hey.

A thousand bucks. I won a thousand bucks.

Yeah?

Heads up.

A thousand bucks, man.

Did you keep that? I saw you keep that.

That lottery ticket's about as useful as your fuckin' hair gel Mickey.

Hey man, let's have a catch.

- Nah. I don't feel like it. - Aw, come on.

Let's work on that curveball, huh?

Yeah and what's a curveball useful for?

Uh, it's fun man.

It's baseball. We love baseball, remember?

Yeah.

Okay no uh...

no shorties, I'm not wearing a cup.

None of this 57-foot slider bullshit.

You know, in Latin America, they don't let kids throw curveballs.

They teach them the changeup.

It's a lot easier on the shoulder, but just as effective.

Was that your changeup?

You don't have a changeup either.

You're a one pitch bitch, Mickey.

'One Pitch Bitch Mickey!'

Hell of a pitch, though.

Hey Mick.

Wanna fish for a while?

What?

Do you wanna fish for a while?

No.

Okay.

Might be a nice trick to learn.

Think I could figure it out.

Oh you do?

You know, it's not so easy Mickey.

There's a subtlety to it.

A finesse.

Yeah, you're subtle.

You're Mr. Finesse.

You're about as subtle as a fucking sledgehammer.

Anyway, look.

Fish, fish, fish, more fish.

Point taken.

Why don't you start a fire.

What are they doing out here?

You said they wouldn't come in the woods.

No, I never said that.

- Yes! You said that... - What I said, Mickey...

was that there would be less of them in the woods.

Same as there will be less of them on the moon.

Relax.

It's done.

Why don't you go put some coffee on or something?

Oh my God!

Stinks?

Ugh!

Oh!

Hey Benny, look, there's a sun roof.

Yeah well it's a fucking rain roof right now!

Close the thing, Jesus Christ.

Well, it's better than the shit that used to be on.

You remember that girl I was seeing up in Pittsfield?

Ummm, no...

Hey.

Check this out.

Right?

Look at this.

It's huge!

We could lay some pillows down, blankets...

it's like a bachelor pad.

Sure.

Alright, then.

Let's go steal some of your dead girlfriend's blankets.

I know what you're thinking Mickey.

And the answer is no fucking way.

What?

You wanna stay.

Just for a little while.

No fuckin' way.

Why not?

Do I really have to answer that question?

But we just go and go, man. Where are we going?

We're not goin' anywhere.

Mickey, that's the point.

We're like sharks.

Sharks are the ultimate survivor, Mickey.

They've been around four hundred million fucking years,

you know why?

'Cause they keep moving.

They stop, they die, it's the same as us.

It's not the same.

That was a house, up in Pittsfield, that we were stuck in.

For three fuckin' months,

- Remember? - I remember.

Your mother, your brother

- They were in a house. - I know.

We ate dog food.

- I know, Benny! - And then we ate the dog!

We ate the fuckin' dog, Mickey!

I had to kill the dog so we could eat the dog.

I'm not gonna have this discussion.

I'm not gonna trap myself

in a big dumb-ass stupid fuckin' house again!

No thank you.

No we came, we checked it out, you're girl's not here.

I'm sorry about that.

But we got some cool shit!

And as of now we're not completely surrounded

by fucking monsters.

So I don't think we should press our luck.

Can't we just stay...

Ahhhhhhhhh!

Ahhh!

Mickey.

Mickey.

Hey.

What?

Pile's hot.

Mickey!

Wanna throw me some?

Mick?

Jesus! What the fuck, man?! Don't do that shit!

Those things are gonna get you killed, man.

And maybe me too. Turn 'em down, will ya?

- Alright. - I'm serious

I heard you, alright.

Okay.

Now...

- Here. - Come pitch me some...

Check this out.

Come on, get out there.

Testing, testing,

What do you think the range is on these things?

I don't know, five, ten miles maybe.

Well, they work.

They do work.

Alright, you can come back in.

Nah, actually I think I'm gonna go take a shit.

Annie, this is Orchard.

Come back.

This is Annie, go head.

Yeah, listen. I got an addition to your shopping list here,

courtesy of Miss Carter.

Go head.

Well, apparently she told Jason uh,

he could pick the movie this week,

on account of the birthday thing.

What do we do?

She told him, "Any movie you want."

What'd he pick?

"Tremors"

Say again?

"Tremors"

It's the giant killer worm movie with uh... Kevin Bacon.

I'm familiar with "Tremors" over.

Well, she promised the kid we'd find it.

Been on my ass all day about it,

like I got time for this shit.

What kind of a goddammed movie is that to pick anyway?

Over.

Well if they got it, I'll get it, Frank.

Yeah, well don't bust your ass over it.

We got more pressing concerns.

Go head, man.

Hello?

Hello, over.

Annie.

Frank?

The Orchard.

Anyone, over.

Who is this?

Uh, hi. This is uh, Mickey.

I'm here with Ben. Benjamin McBride. We're...

We're uh, ballplayers.

We were playing baseball up in Pittsfield, when...

Well...

Anyway, we've been walking forever, and...

We just found a car.

We're in Connecticut. Over.

You stay off this channel.

What?

Wait.

Wait, what? Hello.

Please, we're...

we'e just looking for a place to stay.

We're really hard workers. We can...

fish, and cook...

and I think that we could help each other out, over.

We got hard workers, kid.

What we ain't got is room.

We got no vacancy.

You understand?

Now that's that.

And don't try to find us.

You're not welcome.

Annie, come back.

Go head.

I don't want you talking to these kids,

you understand?