American Girl (Confessions of an American Girl)

A couple of months ago, I was happy and carefree

and full of hope... comparatively.

I was secretly dating the most popular guy in school.

Nice print,

Check it out,

Hey, Rena! Where'd you get that snappy outfit, lost and found?

Funny,

How much wide-mouth suburban trash does it take to screw in a light bulb?

- How much? - If you don't know, nobody does,

Where do you get off calling us trash?

If you 'd like to make a call, please hang up and try again.

- Hurry up before someone sees, - Hey, Kenton,

- You know the rule, - I know,

Stay put,

- Stay down, - I know,

It's nice here, don't you think? It's better than the car,

Oh, yeah,

- I can't do anything today, Kenton, - What do you mean?

Look...do you wanna come to dinner with us?

It doesn't have to be anywhere public, It can just be at our house, right?

Wait here,

Kenton and me had us a real unusual relationship.

He summed it up once by saying, "Put out or get out."

So I decided to get out.

Mama says that the road to hell is paved with good intentions.

I was barreling down the express lane.

And I sure as hell never saw any damn exit ramps, either.

So I started to try and construct my own exit ramps.

So much is missin with Daddy missin

I wonder who's gonna miss me when I go missin

Mama married Daddy forever, until death do them part.

Ironically, that obligation was killing her.

Rena Jo Grubb, what the hell are you doin'?

Dying a slow and torturous death,

Baby, I've been doing that for the last five years,

- You hear anything about your brother? - He'll be home tonight, Mama, Don't worry,

Honey, get dressed, I'll bet he's grown a foot,

Hope y'all recognize him,

Hey, boys and girls, moms and dads,

come on down to Fun Fun City

with rides, attractions, amusements, and candy...

You better come in here and do the dishes, Mama wants things nice,

'Cause Jay's coming home, So exciting...

You got any idea why your sister's out in that pool like some mental patient?

What are you doin' out there?

Shit!

Do they bite right in here?

Uncle Arno! I got a...

Thanks, Uncle Arno, for taking me fishin', letting me tinker on the bikes and stuff,

Don't you go changin',

That was the longest four weeks of my life,

It's a lot like being with Daddy, only he's a lot slower and don't hit quite as hard,

Hey, Rena,

Welcome home, Sissy Boy,

Don't get up,

Mom,

Jay!

Baby,

It is so good to see you!

Oh, my goodness, you grew,

- Did you like fishing with your Uncle Arno? - It was okay,

Yeah? Did you catch anything?

I don't know, Does he have anything?

You ...

- I'm gonna go change, - Okay,

Rena, get your butt in here!

Your skin's gonna get all pruney,

Honey, your daddy sent you another postcard,

Don't you even think about tracking that mud in here,

Jay, get your sister a towel,

Whatever, whatever, Just give me this,

I love to read you nursery rhymes

Me and you, you know, it's our private time

And I'll always be with you

Welcome home, Jay, welcome home, Jay

Welcome home, Jay, Jay Junior

Welcome home, Jay, welcome home, Jay

Welcome home, Jay, Jay Jun... Come on, you guys,

Welcome home, Jay, welcome home, Jay

Welcome home, Jay, Jay Junior

Christ, he was only three trailers away,

Try eight,

I know, but we missed our little baby boy,

So long as we're celebratin'... are we gonna go to Daddy's picnic?

What picnic is that, honey?

The one they have every year, The picnic,

You know, I think it's the last weekend in June,

The annual picnic they have every year in June, Mama,

Honey, I probably have to work that day,

It's been eight years,

I think it's kind of important that we go and see him sometimes,

- We're not going, - I damn sure am not going,

Mama, I think we should go,

Please?

I'll think about it,

Yeah, well, don't hurt yourself, all right?

I hate it when you think about things, It always means "no,"

I wrote him sayin' we'd go, so he's expectin' us,

Did he mention the picnic in his postcard?

No,

Interesting,

- Mornin', Faye, - Morning, Madge,

Your garden is lookin' so nice, I've been meaning to tell you,

What do you want, Madge?

I've been thinking about takin' the kids to see John,

You think that's a good idea?

I think it's a dreadful idea,

But you should take Rena, She needs to meet the son of a bitch,

Right,

Okay, Faye, thanks, You have a nice day now, Okay,

So we going?

I don't know, What do you think?

I think it's a bad idea,

Well, I've still got a month to get used to it,

You hungry?

Here,

All right,

- Good night, - Night, baby,

"And slippery, slippery Sam,

he fell upon the ham."

It's bedtime now, all right, Rena? Your daddy loves you, okay?

Morning, Faye,

You know what I realized?

Our problems come from not havin' a daddy around,

Everything sucks 'cause he's not around,

Why don't we just go and see him? It's not like he's dead or nothin',

Especially since we practically have ourselves an invitation,

I know he thinks about us,

I have every single postcard he's ever sent me,

I thought I heard you babbling away,

Want some cookies, hon?

No, that's okay,

But I made you ...a rose,

- I know you don't like to pick yours, so... - How lovely,

I need it back, though, okay?

You know, Rena...

I think it is time you did see your daddy,

You think so?

Yeah, I think so, too,

Hey, Mama, I brought you this,

Thank you, Rena, What do you want?

Do you ever think that maybe Daddy doesn't do anything

because we never tell him nothin'?

Five minutes of peace, please,

Well, I think he deserves a chance to be a daddy,

Baby, sometimes I think you don't remember your daddy so good,

There's not that much to remember,

A kiss on the cheek, a bedtime story...

I just really want to go, Mama,

What is so important about this damn picnic this year?

Because it is!

He's my dad!

Mama, please! I really wanna go,

Mama, please!

Okay, we'll go,

Okay, honey,

Will you go get me a beer, please?

Hurry up, before someone sees,

- You know the rule, - I know,

- Stay put, - I'm stayin',

Knock, knock,

What do you want?

Baby, I said "knock, knock,"

How do you feel about goin' to see your daddy?

I don't know,

It might be a good idea for us all to go and see him,

I mean, is it something you wanna do, or do you wanna talk about...

I'll go,

Okay, we might have fun, I don't know,

I'll be home after 6:00, Why are you so sweaty?

It's hot in here,

Hey, you ever think about goin' to the Magic Kingdom?

Not particularly,

I bet it's just about the happiest place on earth,

Yeah, that's why they call it "The happiest place on earth," Mom,

I sure wish we could go there instead of to see your daddy,

You 're not really thinking about going there, are you?

Rena wants to go,

I wanna win the lotto, so...

- Here, you want some? - No, no, no,

I missed my last couple of visits,

The time there, it's not so bad,

but it takes my soul a day or two to recover,

You know how things is,

Yeah, I know how things is,

Barbie, I'm not gonna make you go, but...

your daddy sure would like it,

- He always loved you, - I know,

Just like you was one of his own,

Yeah,

So what do you say?

I guess I will if I have to,

Didn't I just say you didn't have to?

Come on, hurry up! I have to go, and I have to go now!

What's going on in there?

- What? - What's going on?

Yeah, I'm just feelin' pukey is all,

What kind of pukey?

I don't know, I'm just sick, I guess,

You know what I'm thinking?