Hit & Miss

That prick John's put the smallholdings up for sale.

I'm thinking of buying it.

It can't have a bearing on what you do for me.

I've signed the forms and sorted stuff out with the social.

I want to be more than just a name on a piece of paper.

I said I'd buy it off you. Wendy and me,

we did have a little arrangement.

Why don't you use my name to go legit on this place?

I'd be loath to lose you.

D'you wanna go for a drink sometime? Sounds nice.

So does he know about you? he doesn't. So don't say anything.

I've been thinking about what you said.

About your arrangement with Wendy.

Maybe you were right.

I thought you'd see sense.

Here's the new deal.

You sell the smallholdings to me and you stay the fuck away from us!

Otherwise... I will kill you. You understand?

Get out.

? Where the devils play

Ready to go?

Just down this way.

So where'd you grow up? Everywhere. Nowhere.

I grew up in a fairground. Yeah? That must have been brilliant.

Had its moments. I left when I was 18.

Right. So do you still see your family?

Not since I left.

Anyway, cheers.

Come on.

Thanks for tonight.

I really enjoyed it.

Yeah. Me an' all.

Don't.

It's not a problem.

It's just...

I'm not like other women.

I know.

That's why I like you.

I've gotta go.

Thanks again.

Yeah. See you.

Aren't you having owt, Riley? gonna be in the barn for?

How long are them boxes the barn for?

What does it matter? Eddie seems like a decent enough bloke.

He seems dodgy to me.

So you don't like Eddie but you like the tranny?

Levi. What? I'm just saying.

What are you lot doing? Nothing.

Let's go, then.

Do you know what a transsexual is?

Is it someone who's half man, half robot?

Yeah, something like that.

My dad said your mum was the village bike.

Everyone's had a ride.

What does that mean? I don't know.

Come on. I've got something to show you.

My dad says when I'm 12, I can have a go too.

What's he doing?

Is John in? Riley, what's wrong?

Can I speak to John, please?

What are you doing here?

Fuck off!

Why didn't you come to meet me? It's over, Riley.

What? Why?

I said it's over.

But we need to talk. It's important. Fuck off!

John, John, John.

Please. Please! Get off!

Come here.

Not now. I need to tell you something.

You know you want it.

Be good to have the house stuff sorted.

Thought you didn't wanna shit on your doorstep.

I didn't. I shat on his.

There'd better not be any comebacks.

I did exactly what you told me to do I know you did.

But you've gotta be careful. What do you mean?

You're not their mother, Mia, and you never will be.

I know that, but I'm all they've got.

I told you right at the start, water and milk don't mix.

Yeah, and blood is thicker than bullets.

Don't forget hat job needs doing tomorrow.

OK? Yeah.

Hey! Is it beef?

No.

Hello, Mummy.

"Hello, baby."

Are you OK? "Yes, I'm fine. Are you?"

I think so.

"You will be. You all will be."

Take your scalpels and then we can begin the dissection.

Why are we doing this?

Doing what? This. What's the point of it?

We observe the behaviour and movements of the frogs that are alive

and the dead ones, we study the biological make-up.

But why? Because it's science.

Why don't you observe my behaviour then kill me?

Don't be silly, Ryan. Fine. I'll do it myself.

Put down the scalpel at once.

Look, I know you've been through a rough time,

but you've really gotta stop... Have you ever heard a frog scream?

You know, I'm getting fed up with you, young man.

Ryan! Ryan!

Hey, Eddie. Hello, mate. How's it going?

Same old. What are you doing here? Mia's out.

Yeah, I came to see you, actually.

I want you to do a favour for me.

Stash this for a while.

Don't tell anyone, not even Mia. Do you understand?

Good lad.

Remember, don't mention it to anyone.

No worries.

What are you doing? You need to rest.

I need the toilet.

We need to take this out first.

This might hurt a little.

Just removing the tube from your penis.

Gents is this way, love. No, no. I'm not...

Come on, you'll be OK.

Riley? Mia?

Levi! Ryan! Help!

Mia?

Are you alright?

What happened?

I got knocked over.

I'm fine.

I'm fine now. Shouldn't you be in the hospital?

I had to get out.

I hate those places. What about the car that hit you?

Shouldn't we call the police? No. No police.

But why? You could have been killed. Riley, please, just leave it.

It doesn't make sense. I think...

I think you should let her rest.

Ben, what are you doing here?

He carried you in.

Have you been here all night?

Give us a minute.

Still doesn't make sense.

How are you feeling?

I'll live.

You should be in hospital, Mia.

I've broken more bones and spilt more blood than this before.

I like you a lot, Ben.

But it could never work.

Why?

It just won't.

Believe me.

Thanks for bringing me in and helping the kids.

But you didn't have to stay.

Is that it, then?

No.

No, fuck that.

What is it, Mia?

I'm a transsexual.

The fuck?!