NCIS: Sydney

? M tley Cr e's "Wild Side" ?

Come on!

Hold! Hold!

You heard the man! Hold 'em up!

- -

Nice and dry up here, ladies!

Got coffees, burgers, fries!

If you want to quit,

all you gotta do is ring my bell.

Wanna sleep in a warm bed tonight?

Have Mommy kiss you goodnight?

You know what you gotta do!

You want out, Austin?

You gonna quit?

No, Chief!

Can't hear you!

- Ahh! - Hoo-yah!

No, Chief!

- -

Okay, everybody up!

Up, up, up, up, up!

Onto the beach!

Move it, move it, move it, move it!

Come on, kid! You got this!

Get up! Get up!

Hey, Austin! Open your eyes!

Austin!

Kid's dead, man.

Hey.

You okay?

The usual?

Yeah.

Peppermint?

Yes, please.

Good morning!

Oh, don't forget to use...

Filtered water. Got it.

I've trained you well.

- What are your legs? - Huh?

Steel springs.

And what are they gonna do?

No idea.

Hurl you down the track!

Right.

How fast you gonna run?

You say, "Fast as a leopard."

Fast as a leopard.

How fast you gonna run?

The hell are you goin' on about?

It's Gallipoli.

It's a film.

Never heard of it.

You are unbelievable, D.

Australia makes films too, you know.

Oh, duh. Crocodile Dundee.

See, now, that's a fine Australian flick.

Bet you can't name another.

-Crocodile Dundee in L.A.? -

Seriously?

The one where our national hero goes to your home town?

That's the one you remember?

You got a lot of catching up to do, D.

Starting with Gallipoli.

It's a great film.

A young Mel Gibson is hot.

Right. Now you're gonna tell me he's Aussie?

Well?

What are you waiting for?

Oh, call me old-fashioned,

but I'm having a little trouble murdering a kid's teddy bear.

Here.

I'll let you explain that one to Rankin's daughter.

Bingo.

Maybe he's not quite the softy after all.

- Mm-hm. -Hey! Think quick!

Ah! No!

- Ooh! Good catch! - Yes! Great catch!

It's encrypted.

How long to unencrypt it?

How long's a lamb's tail?

-Hmm. -

Uh, 'two shakes of a lamb's tail'

or 'how long's a piece of string'?

- This is Mackey. -Uh, that depends, doesn't it?

Well, 'piece of string' if you're not sure,

'lamb's tail' if you're onto it.

-Piece of string. - Got it.

Evie's claiming Mel Gibson's Aussie.

Yeah, Aussie as solar panels, mate.

-Yeah. -Solar panels too?

-Yep. -Come on, now!

Okay, let's roll.

A former SEAL just hanged himself

at a wellness retreat.

There's something wrong with that sentence.

- Yeah. -You drive. Let's go!

- -

- Wolverine. - Uh-uh.

No way is Wolverine Aussie.

Hugh Jackman is Australian.

-Wolverine's American! -Wolverine is fiction, D.

-Wh... -You do know that, right?

Fictional American.

Wait till I tell you about Thor.

Paintball and boot camp meets yoga and meditation.

My worst nightmare.

According to the website, it's run by a husband-and-wife team.

She's an Aussie wellness guru, he is an ex-Navy SEAL.

Guess he brings the 'brute'.

'Former' Navy SEAL.

Never 'ex'.

Once a SEAL, always a SEAL.

Get the gate, D.

Would you...

Damn, girl!

How... You know, how old are you?

- -Oh, it's an oldie but a goodie.

It's a classic Aussie gag.

-Really? -

Aussies came up with the idea of

driving off as they get into a car?

- Mmm. -It's comic genius.

Thank you. Jealousy's a curse.

Let me guess, you guys also invented gates, right?

Mm-hm.

And roads. And cars.

- Mm-hm. -And really bad dad jokes.

[Indistinct radio communications]

So he hanged himself on the massage table?

Situations like this, we like to leave the scene preserved.

We have 20 execs from a Big Four accounting firm staying on site.

I didn't want them to see him like that.

Was Levinson staying on site too?

Yeah, he and a bunch of Finn's SEAL buddies

flew out for his birthday.

It's Levinson's birthday?

Yeah.

Yeah, Pete would have turned 40 today.

Special Agent Mackey, NCIS.

Finn McKay.

I thought you were running obstacle.

I put Axe and Scalpel onto it.

Mind showing my agents where you found him?

Boys got in yesterday.

Um, we had some beers.

Couple of rounds of paintball.

More beers around the firepit.

I had an early start, so I hit the hay before the others.

-What time was that? -About 11:00.

Levinson seem okay when you left him?

Yeah. He was messy, but, hell, we all were.

Been drinking since noon.

You mentioned you might have seen this coming.

How come?

Occupational hazard, I guess.

We spend our lives lying in the dirt

in some ass-backwards country.

No one teaches you how to come home.

Y'all are Navy SEALs, right?

Uh-huh. You serve?

2nd Battalion, 8th Marines.

Afghanistan, two tours.

-America's Battalion. Hoo-yah. -

-Did y'all serve together? -Uh-huh.

But we all ended up cycling out as BUD/S instructors.

- BUD/S? -SEAL qualification.

Toughest ass-kicking in any branch in the military,

anywhere in the world.

You speaking from personal experience?

I had a crack. A long time ago.

We're gonna need to take statements

from everyone staying here.

Sure thing.

And, uh, we'll need to have

a look at Levinson's phone.

-It wasn't on him. -It'll be in his room.

Let me guess - you watched

Demi Moore in G.I. Jane when you were six

and you knew you wanted to be a Navy SEAL.

She was Army, not Navy.

You shave your head like Demi too?

Just concentrate on finding the phone.

So you gave it a crack? What happened?

A charger. Boarding passes.

Oof. You fail?

I quit.

You quit?

Why? Steel springs weren't springy enough?

Somatotropin.

Trenbolone.

Steroids.

Out of place at a health retreat.

-Hmm. -Masking agents too.

Way more than he'd need for personal use.

Think we found Levinson's side hustle.

Ohh.