Ranma ½ (らんま1/2)

Oh, it's cold.

Give me that pigtail!

-Look, I am very sorry, but we are closed.

Huh?

Oh!

What do you want from me?

You know what we want.

-Hand over that Dragon's Whisker.

Where did you hide it?

-And don't play dumb with us, neither.

-- Even if I knew where it was, I would never tell.

The Dragon's Whisker brings naught but pain.

If I were to reveal its location,

untold multitudes would suffer.

So don't think you can force me into telling

you, because I'll never--

The choice is yours.

You can cooperate and tell us--

Or you can die.

-4,000 years ago there was a warlord

whose ever worsening condition caused

him to lose his confidence and self-esteem.

On the verge of losing hope, he encountered

an itinerant Buddhist priest, from whom

he learned the legend of a dragon that

appears only once every thousand years.

So the warlord traveled deep into the mountains

in search of it, finding it at last after 14 years.

After much hardship, finally the warlord

gained his prize-- the Dragon's Whisker.

But others sought the treasure as well,

causing many wars to be fought.

For many years, the whisker was lost, surfacing only recently

when it was discovered being used as a decorative bow.

More recently, however, it was said

to have been taken to the land of the rising

sun by a man of that country.

This is the only clue we have to his identity.

-We've got to get it back from him, no matter what it takes.

Japan it is, then.

A gang that cuts hair?

Huh?

That's right.

There have been several cases already reported.

It's terrible, I tell you.

Girls all over town are losing their hair to giant scissors.

Oh, dear.

You agree with me, don't you?

That someone's got to catch them.

Indeed.

-Frankly, we were hoping you'd say that.

If the peerless, the magnificent head of the Tendo Dojo

can't stop them, then no one can.

Peerless, yes.

Magnificent, without a shadow of a doubt.

Not to mention humble.

Woof!

Absolutely.

Hunting pigtails?

-Well, it is the only hairstyle that's been attacked.

But what for?

Who knows.

Mm.

-So in other words, I've got the perfect bait.

Huh?

Give me that pigtail!

Ah!

Charge!

Hold it right there!

Give it up, pigtail poachers.

Try me instead!

Good show.

-I ain't complaining, but I thought they'd be stronger.

Look, they're consulting.

Hey, I think they're finished.

Careful, son.

Might be a trick.

Maybe.

Hey!

After them!

They're getting away!

Oh no, you don't!

Huh?

Ah, they got away from me.

Or maybe you let them get away.

OK, you guys.

Using the same attack twice is where I draw the line.

Now let's see you run away.

You tell them, son.

-Let's all see what you look like.

-- Those-- those guys are pork buns!

What did he say?

You take that back!

That was a low blow.

What he said.

Look, you're pork buns, OK?

Ditto.

-Ranma, wait-- don't you think that they're really not

pork buns, but beans.

I say they're pork.

I say they're beans.

They're pork!

They're beans!

Will both of you--

Shut up!

We're human.

Just like you.

So keep your insults--

To yourself.

Shut up, shut up, shut up!

Nobody cares what you are, OK?

Pork, beans, curry, peanut butter, or jelly.

The point is, what are you doing here, and what is it you want.

Tell us why you're going around cutting off pigtails.

Yeah, right.

Threaten all you want.

I'll never tell.

OK, then.

-We're looking for the Dragon Whisker.

Dragon what?

What's that?

Dragon's Whisker?

Hmm.

Hmm.

Oh!

It's him.

That looks nothing like me.

Let's get him.

Yeah, give us that pigtail!

-I'll bet they're pretty steamed.

Mm-hmm.

Why those nosy little-- Huh?

-As soon as he heard Dragon's Whisker, he totally changed.

What's it got to do with him?

Why now, of all times?

-This guy's a tough one, that's for sure.

Yep, yep.

It won't be a piece of cake.

Nope, nope.

We need a recipe for success.

Sure do.

Huddle?

Sounds like a plan.

-4,000 years ago, there was once a warlord

who served a powerful ruler.

He was on the verge of losing all hope for his condition

when he was fortunate enough to meet a wandering priest who

leaked an incredible secret.

Every 1,000 years, the priest said, a magical dragon

would appear.

After much fumbling-- what seemed like 14 years, in fact--

he found what he was looking for.

-As for what happened next, well, that

is a story for another day.

Hiya!

Hya!

Hya!

Hya!

Hya!

Stop that, boy!

What are you doing?

Cut it out!

It's just a morning workout.

Ranma, Mr. Saotome, breakfast.

Huh?

-S-s-something must have-- must have got into you boy.

T-take it easy.

MR. SAOTOME (VOICEOVER): Why is the boy so worked up

over some dumb whisker anyway?

Huh?

Top of the morning to ya!

Don't worry about us.

We're just here to paint ya.

He blocked our paint buckets.

That's not fair.

Somebody go get the shampoo.

-You better wash it out of your hair.

We're not kidding around.