The Nanny

Miss Fine, come on!

We're gonna miss the premiere.

What can she be doing up there?

Blow-drying, sir.

Niles, why does it take women an hour to do

what a man can do in five seconds?

Speak for yourself, sir.

Okay, I'm ready. How do I look?

Fine. Now, let's go.

Fine? I need gorgeous. I'm changing.

No. I-I-I meant gorgeous.

Oh, why didn't I say gorgeous?

Why? Why? Why?

Dad, she's been working here for three years.

When are you gonna learn?

Okay; "Does this make me look fat?" -No

"Do you like my hair this way?" -Yes.

"Is my tush wider than usual?"

There is no answer to that one.

Sir, you've got to know how to speak to a woman

Miss Fine, you'll miss the buffet.

Ready.

How do I look?

Gorgeous!

But do you think the dress makes me look..

No; No!.

Do you like what I did with my...

Yes.

Great. I just gotta change my purse.

No, no, no, Miss Fine.

No one's gonna see the bloody purse. We'll be late

Oh, will you calm down?

I know that you always lie to me

and tell me things start earlier than they d

Yeah, well, stupidly, this time I told you the truth

Well, why did you do that?

I depend on that extra half hour that's not real

Oh, children, wait in the car, will you

Tell you what, Miss Fine,

I'll send the limo back for you.

Thank you.

Don't want to keep Alec and Kim waiting.

Baldwin and Basinger? -That's right.

They're waiting in the limo. -I don't believe you

Wanna risk it?

I can't see her. Oh, yeah, that's her with the blond hair

That's Maggie.

Is it?

Oh, you just think you're so smart, don't you?

Yes. Yes, I do. Are we taking Gracie with us?

She's waiting in the limo.

Is she?

Excuse me.

Do you think I'm gonna fall for the same trick?

Daddy?

She was working in a bridal shop in Flushing, Queen

'Til her boyfriend kicked her out

in one of those crushing scenes

What was she to do? Where was she to go

She was out on her fanny

So over the bridge from Flushing to the Sheffield's doo

She was there to sell makeup, but the father saw mor

She had style! She had flair! She was there

That's how she became the nanny!

Who would have guessed that the girl we've describe

was just exactly what the doctor prescribed

Now the father finds her beguiling

Watch out, C.C.!

And the kids are actually smiling

Such joie de vivre!

She's the lady in red when everybody else is wearing ta

The flashy girl from Flushing The nanny named Fran!

Oh, I can't believe how many famous people are here tonight.

Oh, my God, there's the paparazzi that got hit by Sean Penn

Oh, look, there's the one that got hit by Mickey Rourke

Oh, my God, there's the one that parachuted into Liz's wedding

Oh, is this a star-studded event or what

Fran, Antonio Banderas sighting.

I saw Melanie Griffith. And Tom Hanks.

Oh, my God. And I only have one picture left

Grace; pretend to pass out.

When everybody gathers around to help, take a group shot

You see, Miss Fine, if I hadn't dragged you out of the house,

you'd have missed all this.

You'd still be upstairs looking for another purse

Okay. I admit it.

It sure is thrilling being on this side of the ropes

Usually, I'm the schnook on the other side

jumping up and down like an idiot.

Oh, my God, Patrick Swayze. Patrick Swayze, over here

Mr. Sheffield!

Could we get a picture of you and your date?

Oh, you brought a date?

Oh! Oh, wait, one minute, honey. -Okay.

Hey, it's that Italian supermodel.

What's your name again?

Mondula. Mondula. Mondula.

Mondula, Gloss magazine. Who designed the gown?

A new Italian designer, Ragu.

Maxwell, I'm thrilled we're participating in this charity benefit.

It's for a very needy cause.

Yeah. Who's it for again?

Oh, I don't know. Some disease.

Very trendy.

Valerie Bertinelli did the movie of the week.

I didn't see it, though. I had a date.

Oh, then it was a big night for charity all around

Dad, um...

If you knew Fran would kill you for something that you did...

that turned out really bad for her,

would you tell her, or would you try to keep it from her

Oh, now, Margaret, haven't I taught you to confront your problems

Now, what could you possibly have done

to Miss Fine that was so horrible?

Not me. You.

Niles, the limo. I'm going to the club.

See if you can solve this with money.

Dad, Dad, Fran's picture's in Gloss magazine

Well, what's so bad about that? She'll be thrilled.

What, eyes closed? Bad angle?

She's a fashion "Don't".

What's that to do with me?

Read the caption.

"Who let her out of the house with that purse?

Oh, I just remembered the charity. Asthma

Niles, get this piece of trash out of here.

You heard the man, move it.

Knock-knock.

Has anyone seen my new Gloss magazine?

Oh, no. Oh, no. I've been working.

Seen? No, Fran, I'm sorry.

Is this it?

Is there a picture of me in it?

Oh, I don't know.

Page 63, right after the chick in the Hanes ad

What's the matter? Why don't you want me to see it?

I don't care if it's blurry. That knocks 10 years off

No. You can't have it.

You think that's gonna stop me?

Oh, I look fabulous.

Look, they gave me half a page.

Oh, I gotta go call Val.

Everybody out!

Not you!

Oh, Miss Fine, let's not be hasty about this.

Don't you worry.

It's gonna be slow and painful.

Hi, Ma.

Yeah. Mr. Sheffield here

wants to hear all about your hysterectomy

All right, Miss Fine.

I know how to make you feel better.

I'm ready.

Come on.

Let's do it.

Now?

Oh, no. I'm not in the mood.

Oh, you want to. I know you do.

Every time you look at me, you've got one thing on your mind

I don't want you to do it out of pity.

Come on upstairs. You know you'll enjoy it.

No. I'm not prepared.

I'd have to go to the drug store.

Oh, no, forget it.

I'm not dying your gray streak today.

Mmmm...

Poor Miss Fine.

Maybe I ought to buy her a little something

Oh, Maxwell, will you get over your nanny?

The benefit is Saturday night.

You know, she has her eye on that sonic nail drying system

Maxwell, focus. We need a director.

We need a set designer.

We need someone to do costumes.

That's it!; C.C., you are a genius!

We need ushers! We need someone to sell candy

We need a fire marshal!

Oh, just look at these editors of "Gloss magazine"

They don't know squat about fashion.

A bunch of pretentious, know it all wannabes

Why don't they like me?

Fran, forget about it.

Look at you. You're a beautiful woman.

Do you think my friends are coming over here to see me

Take it from a guy.

No one in their right mind was looking at your purse

What'd your father give you to say this?

A boom box.

Meanwhile, your sister got new skis.

Who's depressed now?

Miss Fine; Every producer on Broadway

is preparing a scene for a benefit next week

I'm doing Our Town.

And I need a supervisor for the costumes.

Ma... Maxwell, what are you saying?

I'm saying I want to hire Miss Fine.

Regardless of what that magazine says,

I happen to know you have a keen sense of style, Miss Fine

So, will you take the job?

Are you kidding?