Andie the Great

Hi, baby.

Hello, mother.

Ooh, who is this?

Where's the car?

Oh, it's all the way around the corner, I just...

Oh, okay, hello.

Um, and I don't know.

Wait, what don't you know, honey?

Who the cat is.

What do you mean, you don't know?

Andie!

You can't keep that cat at our house.

Oh come on.

You are not bringing a stray cat into my home.

- I'm sorry. - It's not a stray.

It has a collar.

Well, then it's somebody's pet and we need

to get it back to them.

There's no tags.

I don't know what to tell you, kiddo.

You're not responsible enough for a pet.

Are you kidding me, right now?

I'm an adult, Karen.

Mom.

I just lived on my own for a year.

Eight months.

Petty.

We need to get a letter box.

Shit.

What's wrong?

It's that cunt Millie.

Do not say that word!

Shut up, Mom.

Oh, so now I'm Mom.

- Hey, Millie! - Mom!

Hi, Karen.

Hey, Andie.

- You're back. - Yep.

How's your mom?

She's good.

How long are you back for?

Oh, not long, just a quick little recharge.

Okay.

Well, it was good to see you.

You too.

Tell your mom, I was asking after her.

I will.

I'm sure she says the same.

Well I'll see you around Andie, now that you're back.

Yeah, I mean, I'll probably be gone again,

like really soon, so.

Bye.

I still can't figure out why you're here.

Neil.

Didn't you miss me?

Not particularly.

Liar.

Was the liberal arts major too stressful for you?

I made your favorite meal.

That's very funny.

We have got corn dogs for days.

Thanks, Mom!

Hello, father.

There she is, my favorite child.

Hey.

Well, stop being such a little asshole.

Mom, Dad called me an asshole.

Dean, language.

This is exactly what I'm talking about.

How was rehearsal?

Riveting, how is college?

Bewitching.

Karen, thank you so much for cooking,

but why are we eating corn dogs?

Because they're Andie's favorite.

When she was seven.

Okay,Mom.

Thank you.

Mom, how does it feel having a college dropout

as your first born.

Neil, I am proud of my daughter, no matter what

even if she ends up homeless and unemployed.

Thank you.

But now is as good a time as any

to start talking about your plan.

Do you want me to help you find one?

No, I'm good.

I have a job.

That's great news, where?

Abby's store.

Way to aim for the stars.

Neil, shut it.

See, I told you not to worry.

A mother always worries.

We can't all be as loosey goosey as you.

Yeah loosey goose.

Oh, who is this little beautiful creature?

I found her at the bus stop this morning.

Hi there, pretty lady.

Feel.

Mom says, we can't keep her.

Oh, nonsense.

We can't put such a beautiful creature out into the cold.

Enough with the theatrics, Dean, it's 80 degrees.

What's her name?

Naming her implies we're keeping her.

I was thinking, Karen.

I like it.

Very funny.

Hi, Karen.

Nope, no.

Then it's settled.

Karen the cat.

Baby, hello sweetie, come to daddy.

Oh yes, look at that little tail.

And their seats, go down here.

Cool.

I know it's not a super sophisticated system

but it's just been me for a long time.

Are you kidding me?

Abby, you own your own store, this is so great.

I know, pretty wild, right?

Yes.

Things are kind of slow, but they've been picking up

a little.

You're killing it.

Thanks, Andie.

All right you're feeling good?

Yeah, totally.

All right, I think I'm gonna head out.

Okay.

And just a reminder, the alarm code is 8213.

Yes.

Do you wanna write that down?

No, you got it.

No, I got it, okay.

Okay, and don't forget to bring the sign in.

Okay, all right, I will.

Yeah.

Have fun.

Bye.

Bye, love you.

Love you too.

See you.

As I live and breath, Andrea Offerman is that you?

I'll be damned.

Penelope, I haven't seen you since,

before the war.

God, hi, girl I missed you so much.

Tell me everything.

Yeah, I've been home for like, 48 hours.

But we'll see.

Well, I super believe in you.

What specifically did you hate about uni?

Kind of all of it.

No, it wasn't bad, it was just,

everyone takes it so seriously.

And I don't know if you remember this

but taking things seriously is not my forte.

It's not your forte, that's right.

Hate you.

I told you so, but you totally should have just stayed

here with me.

Community college is where it's at, dude.

Absolutely, no one takes it seriously.

And not even your parents.

Shut up, also it's not like you learn less real facts.

Oh my God, look who it is.

Wow.

Whoa, hey Andie, oh my God, you're back.

I'm back.

Whoa, dude.

I mean like, yeah, no I saw on your Instagram story

or whatever, but it's really good to see you.

You too, man.

Oh, what are you doing right now?

Do you wanna grab dinner with us?

Yeah, no, I'd love to.

I'm not really doing anything, just enjoying the view.

I am actually gonna go home, yeah.

Boo wants to have dinner.

Whipped, home to your bitch.

Okay, I will.

Yeah, that sounds great, full disclosure,

I'm pretty high, right now.

We know Hans.

Okay, cool.

So, how are we talking here?

Three.

Oh, it's not that bad.

Out of three.

Hey guys, how's it going?

Yeah, good, how are you?

A bit of a slow night, but no complaints.

Cool.

Can I start you off with something to drink?

Yeah, We're not engines.

As in we don't need fuel.

Yeah, I got it.

Can we please get two eyed peas, please?