Supernatural

Rest of the place is clear.

Yeah. Uh...no I.D. on this one.

Um...and no clue who is painted on the walls.

Well, whatever happened, looks like we missed it.

Yeah. Great.

Wait a second.

What the hell?

Michael: Hey, Christopher Nolan.

Brian: Yeah? Lens cap.

Oh, crap. Damn.

Strong work, genius.

Dude, I have no idea what to make this movie about.

And I'm, like -- I'm A/V Club President,

so, you know, it's got to be good.

Here. Give me that.

I'll tell you what you're gonna make it about.

You're gonna make it? Okay.

In a world where nothing is what it seems...

...one brave, shockingly handsome, virile young man

and his faithful,

learning-disabled, robotic manservant... Oh, no.

...must battle through waves of cybernetic asshats

in order to sexually liberate the women of --

Okay. Give me that. Give me that.

Michael: Oh, please.

I bet at least one of these girls would let you partake

in their awkward-guy experimental phase.

Brian: What? These girls?

Yep.

Okay. #fails.

Homeschooled.

Secretly in love with her roommate.

Listens to country music.

Oh, dude, dude. 12:00, blonde.

Yeah. Wait. Is she -- oh, crap, crap.

Dude, take it, take it. Just take it. I don't want to take it.

Kate: Were you just filming me?

No. Uh, I wouldn't do that.

Does it have the new firmware?

Uh, yes. Yes, it does.

How's it handle?

You tell me.

Well, your settings are way off.

Oh, I-I like the way the colors --

you probably don't care about that.

Yeah, so, you weren't checking me out?

Well, I do have a thing for beautiful women

who respect their privacy.

Uh, dick move on my part. I'm sorry.

Don't be.

I have a thing for guys with cool cameras.

Hey.

No, no, no. Look, it's a great movie,

but of the two, I-I prefer "Last Year at Marienbad."

You know?

Brian: Yeah. It's a classic.

Yeah. How do you like that lens?

It's good. Yeah, yeah. It's lighter for sure.

It's good.

You know, uh, Michael knows nothing about cameras, right?

Yeah. But, uh, I'm teaching him.

Teaching who?

Oh, my boyfriend.

He's, uh, big, tall, and handsome.

Mm. Sounds delish.

Yeah, you should totally meet him.

Yeah? Mm-hmm.

Let's see. Five years from now?

Hopefully passed the bar exam, practicing law.

Nothing corporate, something, uh...

something green, you know?

Green is good.

Hippie.

Oh, shut up.

Oh, geez.

Uh, maybe, like, working for HBO

or -- or, like, Michael Moore.

That'd be cool.

Michael: Double hippie.

Whatever.

I will be on a boat in the middle of the ocean

with my beautiful girl by my side.

Kate: Aww...sap.

And you can come, too.

Nice. See what you just did there?

Ludensky: ...Display of that,

let's make sure we put our hand up first next time.

All right, brains, let's get our pens and pencils out.

It's time for notes.

So, let's turn our attention

to our cruelly nicknamed friend Piggy.

He uses his glasses to create fire, the sun dial.

He's also rational.

He inhabits rational thought on the island.

Michael: What'd I miss?

Just another pitch-perfect lecture from Professor Ludensky.

Yeah.

Do you know Simon was a Christ figure?

Yeah.

No.

Please tell me you taped it.

Come on. Who loves you?

Aww. I wish I could quit you.

Yeah, right. Yeah.

Oh, hey. Watch it, asshat!

What'd you call me?

Come on. Let's move. I want to see it.

Let's go.

Oh, man.

Brian: Hey, can you shoot some of this for my movie?

Is that legal? Who cares?

Brian: Yeah, that's not good.

Someone got murdered on campus?

You guys live two blocks from here.

Look, look, look. Starsky and Hutch.

Rizzoli and Isles.

Special Agent Rose, and this is Special Agent Hudson.

What the hell are you guys doing here?

Our jobs. You want to tell us what's going on?

Whatever you say, boss.

Got a call from a woman that lives upstairs.

Said, uh, she heard an attack,

came down, found her neighbor here.

Jacob Carter.

Brian: Who'd he say? Uh, Jacob Carter?

I don't know. Well, is the witness still home?

Sure is. She's not the most reliable type.

She said she heard some kind of growl,

like there was a coyote down here.

Awesome.

So, the FBI is here.

Your neighbor got murdered, but you're totally cool.

Brian: No. It's not -- it's not that I'm cool.

It's just that, like...I mean,

that it's good that the FBI are here, right?

That -- that is so annoyingly logical.

Hey, baby. Listen.

Oh. It's pretty. What is it?

It's the song that was playing when we first met.

Aww. You are so disgustingly sweet.

Brian: You ready? Yeah.

Cool. I got to go. Kate: What?

So, you just foam the runway with our song

and then you got to head out the door?

I promised I'd help him test the new cameras.

Don't give me that crap.

I know you two idiots

are gonna go shoot cut scenes for "Jackass."

Come on.

We both know he has nobody else to do this with. Rain check.

Whatever. You're dead to me.

Mm.

Michael: Do something cool.

Dude, this tree is awesome. Hang on.

Maybe I could -- maybe I could...get upside down and --

No, no, I said cool. Ha ha.

This is stupid.

Can you get -- can you see me?

Gonna try and get -- is this cool?

'Cause, man, it feels pretty cool.

It's like "Dumb & Dumber 3."

Ha ha ha. Okay.

Wait, dude, dude, dude, dude. What?

Turn around. Turn around. What?

Turn. It's those FBI guys. What?

Help -- help me down this tree. Help me out of the tree.

Sam: Oh, all right.

Well, thank you, guys, very much for your help.

You're free to go.

All right. There is not a case.

There is a case here. You're rusty.

We just got to dig a little deeper. Come on.

Brian: Dude, it's so crazy.

Is it just me or are you getting

a workplace-romance vibe from those two?

Let's go. Yeah.

Shh, shh, shh, shh.

Come here, come here. Look, look, look, look, look, look.

What?

Yes.

D-bags mating in the wild.

Okay, go, go, go, go, go. Yeah.

Oh!

Stop.

Stop! Hey!