Chilling Adventures of Sabrina

In the town of Greendale, where it always feels like Halloween,

there lived a girl who is half-witch, half-mortal, who, on her 16th birthday,

would have to choose between two worlds:

the witch world of her family, and the human world of her friends.

My name is Sabrina Spellman, and that girl is me.

- -

I was confused by the zombies. I mean, why were they so freakin' slow?

Fast-moving zombies is a relatively new concept in horror.

Earlier incarnations assumed that reanimated corpses

were afflicted by rigor mortis, and, as such, moved slowly.

- How does she know these things? - No idea.

- Just thought they were kinda weird. - I thought it was weird too.

It's fine.

Oh, excuse me.

- Sabrina. - Ms. Wardwell. Hi.

I didn't know you were a fan of horror movies.

Sabrina's nuts for 'em, the gorier the better.

Well, um, who doesn't enjoy a good scare every now and again?

Especially this time of year.

Ms. Wardwell, we have a tradition of going to the movies

and then to Dr. Cerberus's to dissect whatever we just saw.

- Do you want to join us? - I have papers to grade.

But thank you, thank you for the offer. Really.

See you in class, guys.

'Brina, why would you do that?

- Invite Ms. Wardwell? - Yeah.

I feel bad for her, living in that house...

all alone.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Hello?

Help me, please.

Oh, my God.

You poor creature.

My cottage is just down the road.

We'll get you all cleaned up, then call Dr. Saperstein in the morning.

- -

The whole thing functions as a metaphor.

It's a monster movie, Susie.

Devil's advocate, can't it be both?

- Exactly! Exactly, it is both. - Yes.

On one level, yes, it's about zombies, but it's also about the Cold War.

- Civil rights. - The collapse of the nuclear family.

- Did we just watch different movies? - You didn't get that?

From when the daughter turned into a zombie and then ate her mother?

I think Harvey may have had his eyes closed during that part.

- No, I didn't. - Aww!

Oh, that's terrible. You missed the best...

- Save yourself, Sabrina! - No!

I'm a little scared.

- You seem very scared. - They're in the woods. Mmm!

No, I'm not scared. I'm not scared.

"They're coming to get you, Barbara."

Harvey Kinkle, the only person you're gonna scare is yourself!

Gotcha.

I got you something.

Harvey.

I love you, Sabrina.

I was gonna wait until your birthday to say that...

but since we maybe can't celebrate together this year, I thought...

I'm glad you didn't.

I love it.

And you.

Good night, Harvey.

Good night, Sabrina.

I brewed you some tea.

I found some yummy almond cookies in the cupboard.

Won't you tell me your name? Or what happened?

Did someone attack you?

No.

The woods did.

Oh, well...

You're not from around here, are you?

Everyone knows about the witch hunt in Salem,

but there was one right here in Greendale...

1692.

Thirteen witches were hung in the forest...

and their angry spirits have haunted the woods ever since.

How do you know so much...

about witches?

Well, I am Greendale's unofficial town historian, I suppose.

Plus, I teach at the local high school, Baxter High.

Is one of your students named... Sabrina?

Why, yes.

Sabrina Spellman.

Do you know Sabrina?

No, but I knew her bastard-of-a-father

who broke sacred witch law when he married a mortal sow.

The great work begins, Dark Lord.

I shall deliver Sabrina unto you.

Absit omen.

Good morning, Aunties. Ambrose.

Morning, darling. How did you sleep?

Tempestuously, by the sounds of it.

Now that you mention it, Aunt Zee, I did wake up once or twice.

It's an exciting time...

...in more ways than one.

Hmm, I remember the week before my dark baptism.

It felt as if my real life were finally beginning.

I barely slept.

Rabbit's feet, under your pillow tonight, you'll sleep like the dead.

Speaking of the dead, a bat flew into my room last night.

- Smashed through one of my windows. - Oh, want me to bring it back?

No, Ambrose, we'll have none of your necromancy.

- Okay if I bury it in the garden? - Yes. As you wish.

You can bury it in the pet cemetery by the sundial. There's room there.

Oh, wait, what's this?

Before it can be baptized, the temple of your body needs to be purified.

Cleansed of its toxins.

This is actually milk and eggs and rosemary and agrimony,

and a cupful of vanilla and a pinch of John the Conqueror root and...

tannis.

Uh, and other herbs from my garden.

Drink up, darling.

- Don't do it, cousin. - Ambrose.

Sabrina, you need to pick a familiar before your dark baptism.

The Council sent the registry.

I've, uh, indicated a few suitable options.

Now, there's a very handsome hedgehog, a noble-looking owl.

Vinegar Tom would happily welcome another dog.

About that, Aunt Zee.

Instead of picking a familiar out of a book,

which is so, I don't know, dehumanizing...

Familiars are goblins who have taken on the shape of animals

to better serve their witch masters. There's nothing human about them.

But I've been practicing a summoning spell I found in the Demonomicon, and...

what if I put it out there that I'm looking for a familiar,

and see if anyone wants to volunteer?

I think that's a charming idea.

What about your baptismal name? Have you settled on one yet?

I have, as a matter of fact.

Edwina Diana.

Edwina, which is almost Edward, to honor my father,

and Diana, to honor my mother.

And not just to honor them...

to be closer to them.

To have them with me as I walk the Path of Night.

I wasn't gonna cry. And...

I just wish your mom and dad were here to see this, to see you.

- Me too, Auntie. - They would be so proud of you.

They would be so proud of the young woman you've become.

Correction, Hilda, they'd be so proud of the young witch she is becoming.

Penny Dreadful for your thoughts, cousin?

Just...

...some people might say that a bat crashing through a window is a bad omen.

I also found a two-headed frog in my shoe yesterday.

Hold a tick, you're not having doubts, are you,

about your dark baptism?

Back inside with Madams Jekyll and Hyde, you seemed excited.

And I am. But I'm also a little...

It's all right to... to be a little nervous.

Going into the woods, signing your name in the Dark Lord's book.

Even I had butterflies.

What have you told your mortal friends?

That you're being transferred to some posh boarding school in Connecticut?

Cousin...

- you have told them something, I hope. - Not yet.

- I'm waiting for the right time. - But it will never be the right time.

That's why you must rip this particular Band-Aid off.

You wouldn't understand, Ambrose, you were born a full witch.

You didn't have to say goodbye to half your life,

your friends, your boyfriend.

True, but afterwards, when you're fully a witch,

you'll stay younger longer.

You'll cultivate your gifts at the Academy of Unseen Arts,

where your father was headmaster.

You will belong, cousin, in every sense of the word.

I know.

And I want all those things. I do. It's just...

It's dumb.

You're only supposed to start missing things

after you say goodbye to them, right?

I've been under house arrest with our aunties

for the last 75 years, Sabrina.

Forbidden from leaving these grounds.

I am continuously missing everything.