Jay Leno's Garage

let's give it a shot.

real excited about this.

Ow! Jesus!

Ouch! Jesus christ!

-Sorry about that. -I just ... In my pants.

tonight on jay leno's garage...

-Oh, mommy! -We say no thank you to normal.

you got one of those aooga horns?

and seek out both the unusual...

Yeah, this is great.

...And the unexpected.

We've got ridiculous rides...

what is the point of this?

...Bizarre personalities...

oh, wow, that feels

Really good on the twins.

...Moving monstrosities...

Well, that seems more than safe.

...And maniacal misfits who make them.

I had a dream and I said,

"honey, I think we need to build a snail car."

And he said, "no. No, we don't."

dare to be different?

Let's find out.

are you on fire back there?

nah, it's a little bit of smoke.

a little?

life is a highway,

But of course there are always those

That prefer the road less traveled.

These outsiders use vehicles to express

Their own unique view of the world.

To some, they may seem like oddballs or weirdos.

But the iconoclasts

Who seek out the new and different

Are often the automotive innovators...

-Wow. -...Of their generation.

Or at the very least, good for a laugh.

That's the kinda guy tim allen and I are about to meet.

okay, so we've got driving suits, so we're driving.

What are we doing?

this guy called me,

He invented this new kind of racing

And he said did I want to compete in it?

I said, "what is it exactly?"

He didn't tell me until we got here.

Who should I bring? I said, how about tim allen?

He and I love to race, we're very competitive,

And since I usually win, let's--

you usually win because it's your show.

You set all this bull... Up.

-We'll give it a shot. -Yeah, but you always--

You stack it somehow. I can't trust you--

no, I don't stack it! That would be wrong.

yeah, well, of course it's wrong.

Hey, tim.

The only thing wrong here is the idea

That tim can beat me at anything.

-I just think it's kind of bs. -Go!

In fact, the only reason I keep havin' him on the show...

-Come on! Come on! -...Is because I really enjoy

Seeing him lose!

-Not even close! -Bull...!

-How you doing? -Rob, how you doing?

This is tim allen.

-Rob, good to meet you. -Robert rice,

Aka master of mayhem.

-Master of mayhem. -Master of mayhem.

okay, what are are doing today?

you guys are gonna race together as a team.

-As a team?! -As a team?!

You guys are gonna try to work together.

-No! -Work together?

you're gonna have to chain me to the back

If we have to work together!

That's what we're doing.

We're gonna chain race figure 8s,

Have a little bit of fun, and see who's a better driver.

The front car drives,

The back car only has brake and steering.

so there's only one engine really running.

-Yup, the front car runs-- -I don't even have a motor?!

Nope, you only have brakes and steering.

-Oh, I like that part, yeah. -Yeah, that's real fun, jay.

-So I have all the power. -Oh, god.

are the cars modified at all or just stock engines?

just stock engines.

Here's your chain in between, 12 feet.

-Sturdy enough. -Sturdy enough!

He powers around in this thing and I'm just dragging around?

dragging around, trying to stay behind him.

You only have brakes and steering in that car,

-So you can't speed up. -Well, what's the point of me?

You know, that is the most honest question

That's been asked on this program.

"what is the point of me?"

-I don't know. -Well, how do I help him?

if he starts to spin going around the turns,

You pull the brakes to try to help straighten him out

So he doesn't wad the chain around.

we gotta work as a team.

This is a new field of play for me.

Help jay out.

just so we're all clear,

I control the speed in my car

And tim in the other car slows us down.

That sounds about right to me.

what's the worst thing that can happen back here?

-Roll the car over. -Oh, well, you're used to that.

Yeah, well, that's all right. Now it's your turn.

Rob, a question I always like to ask myself

When I get to a racetrack, where is the track?

you're actually standing right in the middle of the figure 8.

so this is where they would cross.

-This is the x. -Okay, got that.

-It all happens right here. -Yup.

If you guys want to try it, I'm gonna let you guys go out first

-And then we're gonna join you. -All right, let's try it.

Let's give it a shot.

real excited about this.

ow! Jesus!

ouch! Jesus christ!

-Sorry about that. -I just ... In my pants.

I do the steering, you do the braking.

whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Are you sure the brakes work in this thing?

you're slowing me down.

whoa!

Kinda dramatic back here.

tim, we should really try this on the dance floor.

Gettin' the speed up now.

yeah, that's ... Great

But I gotta worry about all this ... Back here.

It's very difficult to keep this chain all tight.

just as I planned.

I'm not really sure we did good or bad

But we're about to put our teamwork to the test.

Let's do it.

We're gonna do a 3-lap race

But I don't know how we're gonna tell who's who.

This is like when one set of twins

Dates another set of twins!

-All right, jay, here we go. -Take off easy.

Don't break my back.

okay...Baby.

three, two, one, green, green, green.

oh boy, here we go.

okay, tim, here we go on this corner.

oh god, this is fun, yeah.

Talk about tailgating.

Ow! You'll be hearing from my attorney.

slowing down.

-You okay, tim? -I'm with you for right now.

I'm doing my braking thing, baby.

we should do this with wheelchairs.

that's where this is going, jay.

Wait a minute, hold on now.

fishtail and take 'em out, tim!

oh, boy.

Doink, doink, doink, doink.

I love that gap in the chain!

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, way outside now, yeah!

Yo!

That all you got, boy?

good save, good save!

I feel so connected to you, jay!

-Yeah, I really do. -I feel like

We're like a unit now. We're one!

Tim, let's drive these home!

Let's get on the 405!

speaking of the 405,

My next guest is just as slow.

-How big's the engine? -It's a 14 cubic--

-You mean 4-liter. -Yes.

now, brad garrett loves cars

But he's definitely different from the people

I normally have on the show.

have you had anyone on this show

That knows as little as I do about automotive?

no, most of them are car people.

That's why we have this show.

Well, he wants a new car, so today,

I'm gonna try and help him find one that fits his...

Shall we say, evolving personality.

A lot of friends like brad garrett come by,

They want to ask you about cars

'cause they know I like cars.

You've had some interesting cars.

You had that town and country, the woody,

I remember you pulled out the original engine

And put a modern engine in it.

Then you had a '53 caddy

And you pulled the engine out of that

-And bought a chevy v8. -I'll tell you why.

Unlike you, I don't have a team of people

Around the clock to help me with things,

So when I need new plugs, I just yank the engine.

okay, I think I see the problem.

You know, when you said you didn't know anything about cars,

I didn't realize the extent of that.