Britannia

You've done well, Numidian.

There's one more thing I want you to do.

I am Vitus Aurelius,

optio of the Eighth Legion.

Fuck off back to Rome!

Now it's a war.

Yesterday, I sent an envoy to parley with your father.

Did he change his mind?

Does he even know you're here?

Stop killing my people. Then I'll talk.

The Regni will accept you here,

but only as allies against the Cantii scum.

You trust the Regni?

Hatred is far more reliable.

Camp here.

If I'm not back by sunrise, you join the others.

You understand?

Yes, sir.

Fuck me.

Dad wasn't at home.

He could have been taken prisoner.

Your dad's dead.

I saw him get killed.

You lying bastard!

All right, I made it up.

I'll find the fucking Romans myself!

You have been warned, Aulus Plautius!

Make amends!

Are you sure you're ready, Rome?

Ready for what you'll find?

I'm ready.

Then let's begin.

He looks... shiny.

Shiny, or slippy?

Like a newborn baby.

Our baby.

That's it. I'm off.

Just give it a minute.

He said if he's not back by sunrise.

It's sunrise. It was an order.

If he comes back, finds we've gone,

he's not going to be happy.

So give it a minute.

One minute.

You hear those wolves last night?

Wolves, Decimus?

Banshees...

screaming warnings to us

to depart this devil-infested land.

And they're not wrong, mate.

Who are we waiting for again?

What?

I just forgot.

I just forgot.

The General, you nob. What's wrong with you?

Where did he go? The General?

And where did he go?

The General?

Search me. He never said.

Are you all right, mate?

I'm just a bit sleepy.

I'm just a bit sleepy.

Aren't you?

Now that you mention it...

Now that you mention it...

One...

two...

three.

Morrigan!

Long time no see!

What are you doing with these assholes?

Tell me about it.

I wouldn't be seen dead with them either...

but these are dark times.

No turning back now.

Cantii!

The Romans are back.

Before the snows come,

we'll drive the bastards

back into the sea from where they came!

Hi.

Drop it, now!

-Gentlemen... -Are you deaf?

Who are you?

A passing stranger.

What are you doing?

I was passing,

as you do when you're... you know...

but then I saw you had food,

so at first, I was going to just...

eat the food while you slept, so... and then sneak away,

but then I changed my mind.

I had a better idea,

and so I stuck around.

It is a much more dangerous option,

but the benefits are potentially huge.

You see?

Let's just cut his throat and be on our way.

He could be worth something.

He stinks like a dead camel.

He could know stuff.

It's true. I could.

I could know stuff.

Shut the fuck up.

Milo got five talents bringing in that spy in Gaul.

That's because he was a spy,

not some Celt tramp smelling of shit.

Strictly speaking, I'm not a Celt.

Not a big deal. I know we all look the same.

He'll slow us down.

Five talents is five talents.

Why don't you let the gods decide?

You do have gods?

Toss a coin, let them choose.

Here, I've got one here in my pocket.

This is Roman.

Yeah.

Actually, it's yours.

You took my coin?

While you were sleeping. Sorry. Sorry.

Fucking hell!

Come on, get it over with.

Call.

Heads... no, tails.

Tails what?

Tails, we do him, or tails, he lives?

Which is better?

Mind if I choose, since it's my life?

Shut the fuck up!

All right. Heads, he lives.

Tails, we do him.

Tails.

You don't have to call it.

You said I did.

Can we just do this?

Best of three?

Wha... is that fair?

You stay out of this.

Again. Again!

Give me that!

This could take a while.

Heads.

Come on...

All right.

This is the one.

Who are you?

Why did you go to the Romans?

To save the lives of our people.

You betrayed your king to save a few slaves?

If it was betrayal, why didn't you tell him?

Admit it. You did it just to defy him.

You blame him for what happened to your mother.

So I'm vengeful and reckless,

yet still you didn't tell him.

You want to know why I didn't tell him?

Because we both know

he'd go straight to the Druids,

and the Druids would have you flayed alive.

And we both know

that I would have deserved it.

The Druids are infallible.

They speak for the gods.

Is that why you cut the balls off the husband they chose?

Yet... you did their bidding.

Amena is a snake.

Her ambition is endless.

I married her for my tribe.

For my people, I'll sacrifice everything...

as you clearly will for yours.

Thank you.

What for?

Just saying that.

For saving my life.

For not telling.

You've not been here long,

yet already, I owe you a whole litany of debts.

Keeping a close eye?

Question is, on who?

Here's some advice.

Keep an eye on your husband.

You really don't trust anyone

who didn't suck on your mummy's tit.

Guilty.

I trust my own blood, occasionally my wife,

but I never trust a Gaul.

Just to say, we haven't forgotten about you,

but we've got rather a lot of big stuff

to deal with at the moment.

Well, thanks for the update,

but that's not why you came, is it?

You came because I summoned you.

How exactly did you summon me?

Don't pretend you don't know who I am.

You are Ania,

niece of our sworn enemy, Antedia.

You really don't, do you?

Although to be fair, there's nothing in the prophecy

to say you should.

The prophecy?

Ania is my earthly name,