Cinderella Liberty

Hi, Ted!

- Hi! - Hi!

Liberty call. Liberty call.

Liberty commences, to expire on board at 0800 hours.

Liberty call.

- Good luck, Baggs. - Take care, Frank.

Take it easy.

Thank you.

- Baggs? - Yes, ma'am.

Left wrist, please. Thank you.

Hey, you wouldn't happen to have a-a Forshay--

a Lynn Forshay aboard here, would you?

F-- F-O-R-S-H-A-Y.

He'd be a first class or chief boatswain.

No, I'm sorry. Relative of yours?

- No, not hardly, ma'am. - There you go. First door on the right.

- On the right? - Down the hall.

- Wanna watch your ashes? They're dropping. - Sorry.

You see the New York-Philly game last weekend?

I was at sea last weekend, Doc.

See any good movies lately?

- I was on a cruise. - Yeah?

- Yeah. - Where?

- Uh, Caribbean. - Terrific.

Down there a whore knows how to be a whore. Not like here.

What do you think of all this women's lib horseshit?

Give me a break, will you, Doc, please?

- Good morning, Lewis. Is that the new man? - Yes, sir.

- Good morning, son. - Good morning, sir.

Okay. Let's have a look at your keister. Make a wish.

Mind your p's and q's, we'll be pals.

Step out of line, I'll have your ass in formaldehyde.

- Lewis. Lewis, what do you make of this? - Yeah?

Hell, sir, is this supposed to be a pilonidal cyst?

Are you subject to boils?

I've had a couple.

If you had one, you'll have nine. That's what my mother used to say.

My guess is you've just had a boil that finished running its course.

But a pilonidal cyst and a boil on the ass are two different balls of wax.

Take him down.

- Hey, what happens now? - We kick you out of here and back to your ship.

Hey, that's terrific. My, uh-- My ship's leaving day after tomorrow.

Sorry. It'll take longer than that to get your test results and process you out of here.

- Why? - Beats the hell out of me.

- I'll miss my ship. - Sorry, son.

Couldn't you make an exception? Uh--

- You guys behave yourselves now. - Like always!

- That's what I mean. - Sure. Sure.

If I see Forshay, I'll give him your love.

Don't worry. He's in the navy, and so am I. I'll find him.

Ain't gonna be the same without you, Baggs.

Now hear this: the ship is underway.

The ship is under way.

Hey, make sure you get past the breakwater before you sink!

So long!

Hey, buddy, you shouldn't be here. Come on.

Thank you.

- Wait a minute. What's this? - That's a liberty card.

"Expires 2400 hour." What are you giving me, Cinderella liberty?

Well, it's a Cinderella liberty card.

Yeah.

Well, how-- how come?

Regulations. Officially, you're still a patient here.

I'm--

Well, what do you expect me to get done by 12:00 midnight?

The longer you stay here, the less time you'll have to do it.

Is that right?

Well, I'll just-- Might as well stay here and work on you.

Actually, I don't get off duty until midnight.

Mmm! You come with me.

Don't do that. Uh--

- Please, Miss Kathy. - That's right.

Oh--

Listen, uh, it's getting very hot in here.

What? I can't hear you.

I said it's hot. Can we-- I don't feel much like, uh--

- I don't feel much like dancing anymore. - What?

Oh, it's, uh-- it's 10:00 already.

- Can't hear you. - I said that it's 10:00 already.

Dancin'! Whoo!

It's 10:00!

What are you making a scene for?

Come on. I have a table.

Sit down. Let mama take care of you.

Now, sit down. That's right.

- I want another champagne cocktail. - Another champagne cocktail.

- There's a nice ass. - Yeah, well, so's mine.

- Yes, it is. - Mine's better than hers.

- Yes, it is. It's, uh, very nice. - My legs are better too.

- Yes, they are. - In fact, my whole body's better than hers.

Now, where are you going? I want my drink!

Have mercy, Maggie.

Show 'em, Maggie. All the way home.

That's either a cue stick, or a real man just fell in here by mistake.

You want to go again? Hey, anybody, come on. Come on. Hey, hey.

Ain't nobody here knows how to stroke a good stick?

Come on, sweetheart.

I'll give you a little try.

Get the ball. Hey, man, get the ball.

Okay. Come on, Maggie.

- Come on, Maggie! - Come on!

All right. Now, you want a tight rack. There you are.

Comes out of the pocket. No money.

- Hey, you want to play again? - Yeah, I'll try again.

- Okay. - Is that one I give you?

Yeah, just one. Rack 'em up.

You make sure you get a real good, tight rack.

- I'll say. - What are you, Willie Mosconi or something?

Keep it up like this, Maggie, you gonna make enough dough...

to go back to New Orleans.

- Excuse me. - Yeah.

- Oh! - Oh, my!

Yes, ma'am?

Eight ball in the corner pocket.

Yeah, I know that.

Whoo!

Pay the man.

Next?

Tell you what-- I'll, uh-- I'll play you one for 50 bucks.

- Fifty bucks? - Fifty?

Well! Fish, I'd like to get my hook in you...

but I don't have but maybe 20.

- Twenty, huh? - Mm-hmm.

Well, uh, maybe we could work something out.

Tell you what I'll do-- I'll, uh--

I'll play you 50 bucks against somethin'.

I ain't got nothin' worth 50 bucks.

Haven't you?

Whoa!

Sailor, I don't even know you.

Well, that won't take long.

Okay.

Whoo-whee!

New shooter.

Excuse me.

Don't, uh, shade the pocket, please.

Oh!

It all depends on the angle of the dangle.

Guided control snow.

That's the name of the game here.

How do you do?

- What did I do here? - Oh, he's screwed. He can't see it.

I did snooker myself, didn't I?

Try it another way here.

I'll play the eight. All right. We're set.

You gotta be kidding me.

How did I hit it?

Oh, man!

Mama, your little girl's been hustled again.

Listen, I don't, uh-- I don't mean to rush you none...

but I'm on Cinderella liberty, and if I don't get back to the hospital by 12:00...

why, I turn into a pumpkin.

- "Baggs, John, Jr. BM-1." - Yes, ma'am.

You ain't from the psycho ward, are you, John?

No. Uh, pilonidal cyst.

Pile of what?

It's a long story.

Yeah? Well, as long as it ain't crazy and it ain't catching.

Come on, John. I owe you something.

Can I have my hat, please?

Thank you.

You're really a hell of a pool shooter. Where'd you learn?

- Backyard, church. - Church?

Well, we had a little table in the basement.

- Yeah. - Partner, can I beat you out of a quarter?

Oh, yeah.

I need a jug of wine.

- A jug for a quarter? - Sure.

- Well, you got it. - Okay. Thank you very much.

- God bless you. - You bet. God bless you.

How did you know I would pay up?

I'm a-- I'm a good judge of character.

Fifty bucks, huh? Makes me feel expensive.

Well, I guess we're both winners.

I'll tell you what-- next time I'll play you for a hundred.

I ain't cold.

I hope not.

This is it.

Come on.

Oh.

We have to be quiet. My kid's asleep on the sofa.

- You got a kid? - Mm-hmm.

Shh.

No, Dougie, it's all right. It's only me. Go back to sleep.

Just a second. I'll turn on a light.

Excuse me?

- Do you want some help? - Fifteen years, you'd think you'd get--

- Yeah, if you can just grab the top here. - Sure.

Oh, I hate that. Oh, I hate that.

Ahh. Mmm.

Um--

- Just, uh-- - Oh.

Nice.

Um, the springs are very noisy.

This ain't the Holiday Inn.

I didn't mean, uh-- The boy-- wake him up.

He's a heavy sleeper.

Could we, uh--

Yeah. Wait, wait, wait.

- Okay. - Okay.