The Discord (La Zizanie)

Louis de Funès and Annie Girardot in:

"The Discord."

Bernadette, are you asleep? - Yes.

Did you hear that? - What?

There's a spy. I'm sure of it.

I saw him. He's after my designs. Come on.

Well, go ahead then.

Not that way. This way.

Oh, it's just Ronron.

Come on.

He's going to get a nice color. - It's me.

I'll cook him, that rascal. - It's me, the idiot.

He's not a rascal, he's the idiot.

Yes, the idiot.

What are you messing around here for?

I had to keep an eye on things for you.

Here, put these on.

Did you see anyone? - Yes, you. But too late.

He followed your instructions.

What an idiot, he's just an idiot.

I don't want that. - The doctor insists.

The bastard. - Why?

He's after you. - Not at all. - Yes, he is.

Now, open your mouth. - No.

Open!

Bernadette. - Guillaume, we've been married 23 years.

You married me and now I'm a grown woman.

Despite your brilliance, I love you, darling. But I'm tired.

I can't sleep. - Go count your employees.

1 employee, 2 employees, 3 employees, 4 employees, 5 employees.

We need more smoke. We have to pollute.

Why? - For my Japanese guests.

Burn tires. - Which tires?

These small ones, they won't notice. Come on, get to work.

Not that one. This is mine.

The neighbors won't be happy about this. - I don't care.

Bernadette, Bernadette. My little monster.

Leave Arthur alone. - Where are you?

Here, right in front of you. - Where?

Well, here.

What about lunch? - Yes, it's ready.

But there are twelve of them. - Don't worry.

Where's that smoke cannon? - There, on that hill.

In half an hour, they'll fire. - What's the signal?

We wave a white flag.

Like this.

Oh, the idiot. Let me through!

Did you cut the tongue into small pieces?

Yes, Mrs. Daubray.

For which recipe? - Hondazaki.

I don't know that. - You serve it raw, on a flat...

stone, like a plate. With some vinegar for flavor, and tea and soy sauce.

Mrs. Daubray, that must be another experiment by your husband.

Yes, it's his.

Oh no, my Japanese buyers. My Japanese buyers and my mist.

They might get lost.

Take it easy, boss. - I know this way.

Here I am. - They are Japanese.

My Japanese guests. - Sorry, we're lost.

My fault, where's the president? - There he is.

Mr. President!

Give me a hand. - Come here.

I can't, my suit...

Sir. - Yes?

He's not the president, it's the other one.

Mr. President, wait! It's me.

Mr. Daubray-Lacaze. - Hichumacho.

There's the car. My dear president.

Gentlemen, this is the famous CX22, for which you made this trip.

Viola. No photos, no photos.

No!

No photos!

No photos!!!

Photo taken.

My CX22 can destroy all smoke and dust in seconds...

pollution, all kinds of dust particles,

exhaust fumes, vapors, and other nuisances...

all the toxic substances we inhale in our cities.

It can do this within a 4-kilometer radius. Now, a demonstration.

He wants to know where the smoke is. - Gone... gone... vanished, evaporated.

The smoke is completely gone, over and done.

What did he say? - He said "ha".

What did he say? - He buys.

To my office, quickly.

What is this?

This can convert wind into electricity.

Just watch.

I turn on the power circuit, just blow.

In the morning, you place it outside, the wind turns the rotors. And it charges.

That evening, you have electricity until the next morning.

He buys. - To my office.

And this? - A solar-powered stove.

He buys. - To my office, quickly.

Yes, that's where it all started.

50 years ago, when I was very small, I made this...

Oh no, not that one... Hop, to the office.

Mr. President, how many will you buy?

100? - 3.

103? - 3000.

3000? We'll sign immediately!

The contract.

The contract, please.

A pen, please.

Ocho Kuzidozo, lunch is ready.

Please, have a seat.

Mr. President, sign here.

The president will sign the contract after lunch.

Delicious, French cuisine.

No tea, it's finished... Bernadette, no tea, the Calvados.

What? - The Calvados.

Guillaume, it's a bit early. - Not for business.

That's enough.

A toast to Normandy, an old French custom.

Just like harakiri is an old Japanese custom.

A toast to Normandy, that's French harakiri.

A toast to Normandy. Look up.

This is nothing.

Okay, attention. - Ad Fundum!

Ad Fundum? - What does Ad Fundum mean?

A toast to Normandy. - Ad Fundum!

I know... right after... very hungry.

A toast to Normandy. Look up.

Ad Fundum!

A toast to Normandy. Look up.

Ad Fundum!

Well, sign here.

No, not Normandy. Later, after signing.

No no, now the check...

No, no, with this. How much?

Look at me: 1, 0, 0, 3, 4, 5, 6.

No no, sign.

Thank you. Thank you.

Toast to... - No, that's over, done.

Everyone on the plane, right now.

Beautiful, all this. What's it called?

A laugh on a summer night.

3000! - 3000 what?

3000 CX 22's. I must deliver in 90 days.

Take it easy now.

I signed. - But you wanted that.

This is too small. I need to expand. - Go ahead if you want.

That land belongs to the Count of Mortland.

Impossible. You defeated him three times in elections.

And that's Mrs. Bourgoin's property. - She's not dead yet.

She's not dead yet? She's not dead?

Good god, nothing can be done. - There's always that still.

That's state property.

Then it's up to the prefect. He's a friend, he'll rent it to you.

Tomorrow I'll go see him.

For a prefect, which one? - This one, he's dull.

Help me. - After all these years you'd...

And, can you sweet-talk the prefect a bit? - No...

Good morning, doctor. - Good morning, friends.

Mr. Daubray-Lacaze, all well? - Very well, just like yesterday...

Say, my wife is also doing very well.

What ailment did you find in my wife that requires...

you to sit here every morning? - Busybody...

There.

Very natural fertilizer.

Dear, it's very fresh, still warm. - That's kind of you.

What ailment did you invent to visit me every day?

Oh, Bernadette... - That "oh" is very in these days...

Have you seen the chimney of your factory

all that smoke? And the artificial fog?

Ah, I know. Guillaume got carried away.

Our members got carried away too.

Are they sick? - Not at all.

I'm also chair of the committee for ecological preservation.

That's true. Sorry. A noble task.

You need to keep him in check. - You won't keep him in check.

He just landed a huge contract.

He's over the moon. And I'm happy for him.

You're wonderful. - Say...

If you only... - I'm faithful.

Indeed. And you know, a man like Guillaume...

needs constant attention. To protect him.

I watch him a bit. - Apparently.

Careful, he's a carnivore. And

poisonous. Spit it out into the reinforced humus.

Elections are in a month. My supporters insist...

to run against your husband. - That won't work.

It wouldn't be nice either. You'd lose anyway.

Lose, me? - Yes, he has the majority.

With all their laws and counter-laws. - Then he'll go to the opposition.

But he hates the opposition. They're the majority.

Come on, Bernadette, don't be afraid. You know how careful I am.

But it still hurts. - A little pain to prevent worse.

Sorry. This is the first time this has happened to me.

Good morning, Mayor. The prefect is expecting you.

Mr. Prefect, Mr. Daubray-Lacaze.

Mr. Prefect, Mr. Prosecutor.

If you don't mind, we'll continue playing while we talk.

Of course, sir, that was perfect. - You think so?

He hit it, I saw it.

What brings you here, Mr. Mayor?

The Japanese placed an order for 3000 CX22's.

You know my factory is very small. So I need to expand.

And where do I fit in? - Well, the state owns...

the state owns land bordering the factory, so rent it to me.

That's very difficult with your reputation. - What do you mean?