Hardball - First Season

Hi! My name's Mikey.

This is my home.

I live here with my daddy, Daddy.

And my cousins.

My dad's a choice footy player.

One day he's going to be in the big leagues.

When are you going to be in the big leagues?

One day, cuz.

I live in Rotorua, New Zealand.

There's a sweet lake.

Me and my cousins fish there.

See? Fish.

These are my friends.

Taika, Tekohunui and Greg.

My school is...

Hello? Uh-huh.

Tomorrow? Sweet.

That was the Western Sydney Bullfrogs,

an elite rugby league team who want me to come and play

effective immediately.

You know how I said I lived in Rotorua, New Zealand?

Let's pretend that was 10 seconds ago.

130 bucks!?

Welcome to Sydney.

I haven't seen Auntie in a while, so just smile and be yourself.

OK? OK, Daddy.

Hi, Auntie!

Hi.

You're early.

By three minutes.

Early.

Sorry.

Can we come in?

Come in.

Come on.

This is where you stay.

Bathroom's through there.

Don't use the bath, it doesn't drain.

Toilet's through there.

It's just a toilet.

This is my movie shelf.

They're my movies.

This is where I work.

This is the fridge.

That's my shelf. That's yours.

This is your bed.

And this is yours.

Fairies? Choice!

Ocean views.

Awesome.

I got to go to training.

Can you take care of Mikey?

Knock 'em dead, boy.

You too, Daddy. Love you. Love you too.

I'm Mikey. You're my auntie.

So, how long you been my auntie?

How long you been alive?

Oh, about ten years. About ten years, then.

Sweet as.

How come we never met?

You live over there, I live over here.

Sweet as.

Thanks for the van bed, Auntie.

I was going to scrap it. You just saved me a trip to the tip.

Oh.

That's it. Let's go. OK.

So, what's your favourite colour? Blue.

Sweet as. Favourite food?

Eggs. Just eggs?

Yep. Sweet as.

Favourite animal?

Ants.

They're insects.

Ant... elope.

Who's that guy? Elvis, the king.

My favourite singer.

Really?

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Dirty... dacks.

Has it started yet?

Lunch. Thanks for the lift, Auntie.

Pick you up after school. Yep.

You're late!

Lift, twist, pull.

Lift. Twist. Pull.

Hey, I got it! Coming!

Michael, is it?

Mikey's OK, Miss...

..Crapper. It's Crah-per.

The A is long.

Oh, sorry. Miss Crah-per.

Mz Crah-per.

Mz Crah-per.

Where's your uniform?

I just arrived here from NZ, Mz.

Walk this way.

Not much in your size.

No worries, Mz.

Try these.

Off.

Hurry up.

How do I look?

Well, it's a...

Tight, but choice.

So, are you like a teacher, Mz?

I'm the principal elect. What's that mean?

It means I will be the principal, but I'm not yet the principal.

Promotion? Choice.

What do you do now?

Teach you.

Prisha, back to your desk please, darling.

Lance, just prance back to your desk.

Thank you, Miss Bahm.

You're welcome, Mz Crah-per.

5B, please welcome your new classmate, Michael Mahaki.

He's joined us all the way from New Zealand.

Welcome him!

Welcome.

Good to be here.

The name's Mikey

and although I might look like a big kid,

I am ten and I'm looking forward to getting to know you all.

High school for giants is across the road.

Dang! Wish I knew before I enrolled here.

The Avengers called. They need Hulk back.

Tell them I'm busy getting an education, bro.

Children, that's enough.

Bags Mikey man for my tug-o-war team. He's so strong.

I said enough.

Be seated.

Sorry, bro.

Sorry.

Thanks, bro.

No problem, Mahaki.

Dismissed.

Michael?

Yes, Mz?

This is Tiffany Steele-Stone.

She'll be your buddy.

Tiffany, show Michael the ropes.

My pleasure, Mz Crah-per.

Tiffany is one of the finest students

this school has ever produced.

Without great teachers, there are no great students.

Thank you.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to meet your delightful dads.

Dads?

Dads.

Choice. Michael, is it?

Mikey's OK. Mikey. Cute.

So, this is our classroom, OK? But you already know that.

We have a whiteboard, we have charging docks.

OK, listen noob.

Noob? Yeah, noob.

It means new.

Oh.

Back to me.

I have way better things to do at lunch

than show you where the toilet is.

You're on your own, Tiny.

Huh? Tiny.

It's an insult. But I'm big.

That's why it's funny.

Because it's ironic?

What? You're weird, OK?

Thanks for the compliment.

Point made, OK?

Now, if you tell The Crapper that I didn't show you around...

..you're dead meat.

Thanks, bro.

Mind if I join you, Mahaki?

Sweet as.

Lunch of champions.

Messy as, but...

Not if you tear and dip.

Oh, tear and dip.

Indeed. The name's Jerry.

Nice to meet you.

So you're from across the ditch?

The what? The Tasman Sea.

Huh? You're from New Zealand.

Oh, yeah. Me and Daddy just got here.

And Mummy? She's not around.

First days are hard.

Tiffany showed me around, sort of.

Short tour? Yeah.

She did that to me on my first day.

Hey, Jerry, look out!

Jerry! Chuck us the ball.

What are they playing?

Only the finest test of skill ever invented.

If you want to fit in around here...