Lonesome Dove

Go down to the river to eat that snake.

Go on, get. Go on. Get out of here.

Get out of here.

Little early to be quitting, ain't it, girls?

Or is it Christmas?

Girls yourself.

It ain't Christmas, neither.

It's that hell bitch.

She bit a hunk out of him.

I'm glad you got here before fall, Newt.

We've been missing you.

It's supper time.

Either that or old Bolivar's calling up bandits.

We hear you, dern it, we hear you!

'I God, Woodrow,

as long as you've worked around horses,

I'd think you wouldn't

turn your back on Kiowa mares.

You want to think something,

think that roof back up on the barn

instead of sitting in the shade.

I ain't scared to be lazy.

That don't recommend you much.

Can we eat, or are we waiting till the argument's over?

You will starve if you wait for that.

Many thanks.

If you ever get tired of loafing,

you can get work waiting tables.

I had a job waiting tables once,

on a riverboat.

Wasn't older than Newt there, but...

I had to give it up.

How come?

Well, I was too young and pretty.

The whores wouldn't let me alone.

Listening to you brag don't improve the taste

of these Mexican strawberries none.

The only way you'll get better food

is by shooting Bolivar.

And another thing, Bol.

Quit whacking that dinner bell for supper.

Whack it at noon if you want to.

A man with any sense can tell it's sundown

without you whacking that bell.

General Robert E. Lee freed the slaves.

I can whack if I want to.

Abe Lincoln freed the slaves, not General Lee.

He didn't free Mexicans anyway, Bol.

It was, uh...

Americans that he freed.

You're in over your head, Pea.

It was Africans Abe Lincoln freed,

no more American than Call, here.

I'm American, by God.

You was born in Scotland,

though you was on the teat when they brought you.

I'm as American as anybody from Tennessee.

You boys can sleep easy tonight

knowing Captain Woodrow F. Call

is guarding the river,

keeping you safe from Indians and Mexican bandits.

There ain't no Indians no more.

We cleaned them out.

How about Blue Duck?

You never got him.

No, we never got that half-breed.

Blue Duck ain't around here nowhere.

His range is further north.

How come the Captain goes to the river?

He just misses the wild old days

when he had somebody to outwit, that's all.

I'll whack that bell if I want to.

What's the matter with that knife, Bol?

Won't hold an edge?

It is like a wife.

Every night

you better stroke it.

Your wife in Mexico

must be getting rusty by now.

She don't get sharpened more than

twice a year, does she, Bol?

She is old.

Like you.

The older the violin, the sweeter the music.

You ought to bring her to meet me.

No, I know you.

You would try to corrupt her.

How about one of your daughters?

You've got nine, ain't you?

I don't see no scalps.

Good night to slip into Mexico and cross some stock.

Cross it and do what?

It ain't against the law for you to work.

Can I go to Mexico?

I'm getting old enough now.

You'll get old quick if you sit around talking.

Best go on to bed.

It's still early, Captain.

You go to bed now. We got work tomorrow.

Yes, sir.

You ought to let him set awhile.

The only education he's got is listening to me.

What kind of education is that?

You think he'll learn more

shoveling horse poop for you?

I shovel my share. It ain't hurt me.

Fine, if that's how you want to make your fortune.

I think I'll straggle down to that gin palace

see if I can't scare me up a card game.

Now, you pigs...

You don't wait up for me, now.

Evening, my good friend.

Mr. Gus, come in, come in.

Loan me $2.00, all right, Gus?

Why would I loan money to a loafer?

You ought to be trailing cattle.

I'm leaving next week to do just that.

I'll pay you back.

Evening, Lorie. You look fine.

Real fine.

Listen, me and Lorie are trying to talk.

Dish, you got a sour stomach?

What you need is a good game of cards.

Ain't that right, Lippy?

I didn't come in to play no cards.

How about you, Wanz?

Put that rag away.

Most people wouldn't notice dead skunks on the table.

Put you in a better mood.

Nothing else to do around here anyway.

Almost sunup.

How did anybody that pretty wind up in Lonesome Dove?

A gambler named Tinkersley

left her here a couple of years ago.

Before that, he'd had her, uh...

sparking boys in San Antone to

pay his debts.

Damn him.

She didn't mind.

She was rat-holing her tips,

trying to save to get to San Francisco.

He stole her money.

She caught him drunk and tried to shoot him.

He beat her black and blue.

Bit her lip, too.

That's how come she got that scar.

That little scar.

I kind of like her.

You been with her?

Sure, who ain't?

Even Wanz treats himself once or twice a week.

Of course,

she won't have nothing to do with Lippy.

Here's that $2.00 you wanted to borrow, Dish.

Go ahead, take it.

Wouldn't want it said I'd refuse a loan to a friend.

Much obliged, then.

I'll pay you back this fall.

No need to ride off tonight, Dish.

Throw your blanket on our front porch.

I appreciate that. I do, I...

Darn, I think I left something on the table.

Imagine that.

If it's all right with you, Dish,

I won't wait.

No need. You go on.

Get from here, you pigs.

I ain't giving you no biscuits.

Now go on, get. Go on.

What's Dish Boggett doing on the front porch?

Well, sleeping, unless you woke him.

How's that horse bite?

Hell, I been bit worse by bedbugs in Saltillo.

Let me pour some axle grease on it.

Tend to your biscuits.

You up all night reading the good book?

It's hard to have fun in a place like this, but

I do my best.

Biscuits are ready.

We come here to make money.

There wasn't nothing about fun in the deal.

You like money even less than you like fun,

if that's possible.

Wake up, Newt.

You'll poke your eye with your own fork.

See what happens when you keep him up all night talking.

Hurry, Pea.

It'll take a hacksaw to cut them eggs, the way

frying them in coffee grounds, Bol.

I don't care.

Pea eye, it's bad manners to go relieving yourself

where people are eating breakfast.

What would your mama think?

Good morning.

Morning, Dish. Have some bacon.

Thanks, Captain.

You can work it off.

Work it off?

Hey, come look who's riding up the road.

It ought to be Deets.