Wizards of Waverly Place

You got a new locker, Harper?

I had to, since you had mine refrigerated for your beverages.

Oh, good, and this one can be a freezer for my ice cream.

- You're the best, Harper. - I guess it doesn't matter,

Because we graduate this week anyway.

I'm kind of excited.

You may be stuck in this corral.

A bit longer than you think, Ms. Russo.

You do not have enough credits to graduate.

What?! But I sned up for every class I had to,

Even the one where you sit around all day doing nothing.

That's detention.

Which means...

...You will not be graduating!

Take that, Ms. Russo!

Ah!

And to make sure there's no funny business,

I'm going to keep all of the records.

Right here in my new, alex-proof safe.

Some students may have to do without desks next year,

But I still say it was money well spent.

This just in: NASA has been tracking an enormous asteroid,

Hurtling through space, which has suddenly switched directions

And is now on a collision course with earth.

NASA is speculating impact as soon as this evening.

We are all in great peril.

Jerry, what is she saying?

Don't they have a plan to save us?

I hope so.

Ma, did you see me? Did you see me on tv?

I was the one yelling, "hi, mom," in the background.

I'm sorry I didn't say but "hi, mom" is usually.

What those idiots in the background always say.

- Did you guys hear about the asteroid? - Yes, it's terrible!

Yeah, you would think.

Earth isn't gonna be destroyed.

We've been tracking the asteroid for years, and according to our calculations,

It only looks like it's gonna hit the earth.

You see, due to the curvature of earth's orbit, its gravitational repulsion,

And a bunch of other stuff you have no hope in understanding,

My calculations clearly state the asteroid will pass by harmlessly.

Are you sure? Because that's not what the nasas are saying.

Yes, we're very sure. We've done the math.

Why's that decimal point sticking out?

'cause it's a chocolate chip.

You guys make math fun.

Zeke, we have a "no snacking while we're asteroid tracking" rule!

Oh, no. This means NASA was right.

It's the end of the world!

Oh, my gosh.

It's gonna be ok, honey.

Is there anything in the emergency handbook that could help us?

Yep, it's right here in the thumb.

"in the event earth is destroyed, wizards and their immediate family.

Are welcome to escape through the portal and live out their lives in the wizard world."

What about me and Zeke?

I'm not leaving Harper behind, Justin.

We don't have to. It's right here on the back of the hand.

"each wizard is permitted to bring.

One non-wizard with them to safety in the wizard world."

I'm bringing my new pet starfish.

He's got a missing leg.

Don't stare at it. He's very self conscious.

Aren't you, four-leggy?

You can come with me, Harper.

Oh, thank you! And even though you weren't able to graduate.

From our school, maybe you can graduate in the wizard world.

I'm sorry, Harper, did you just say something about graduation?

Oh, Zeke can go with Justin! Yay!

Yes! I'm going to live!

All my hopes and dreams can continue!

I'm gonna introduce clogging to the wizard world!

Yes!

All right, does everyone have their one allotted duffel bag.

Packed with items crucial to your survival in the wizard world?

Yep, and I totally beat the system,

Because I'm taking a bag of bags.

Somebody's bag smells like smoked Turkey.

Dad, you're bringing a duffel bag full of cold cuts?

We're not going to the movies.

I paid for this meat. I'm not gonna let some asteroid gobble it up.

Your mother's bag is full of mustard, lettuce, tomatoes and onions.

Uh, sorry, Jerry.

I opted for the irreplaceable photos of our children, instead!

Am I the only one with my head screwed on straight around here?

Hey, I am bringing a tv and a big bag of pretzels.

Nothing in my life is going to change.

Ok, so clearly no one brought anything useful.

When you need shampoo and shoelaces, don't come crying to me.

More breaking news.

NASA has just hit the asteroid.

With their deep space asteroid Buster missile.

Unfortunately, the asteroid missile malfunctioned and has not detonated.

Oh, no!

We apologize if you said "yay" before I could finish this update.

Earth, as we know it, will soon cease to exist.

Well...

I mean, I guess that's it. We have to go.

I'm gonna miss this place.

Let's go.

Really? We're just gonna leave like this?

What are you doing?

We can't just walk out on a world of people.

Who are about to be destroyed.

Sure, they're not all people we like.

For me, Mr. Laritate comes to mind.

And most of them don't like us.

Again, Mr. Laritate comes to mind, but...

- ...They are still people! - Honey...

There are some times when your family has to come first.

Look, I promise you, when you're a parent, you'll understand.

Yes, mija. This portal is our only hope.

I can't believe I'm begging to go to that freak show of a wizard world.

Well, I'm not going anywhere until I at least try to stop the asteroid.

I mean, we have powers, people.

Let's use them.

Juin, Max, are you with me?

I'm not gonna let you get all the credit for saving the world again.

So yes, I'm in.

I'm in too, as long as we don't take too long, though,

'cause there is an asteroid on the way.

Ok, then, it's settled.

The fate of the world is in our hands.

Well, the only thing we can do to stop the asteroid is take a space shuttle up there,

Find the malfunctioning NASA missile, and blow it up ourselves.

Why can't you just flash up there?

Zeke, the asteroid is moving faster than the speed of magic.

Of course! Dumb, dumb, dumb!

Ok, so where are we going to get a space shuttle?

Why did you glance at your bag?

I don't even know where my bag is. I didn't.

Why are you trying to kick it under the table?

What? I didn't... Oh, there it is!

Come on! I just got a brand-new Captain Jim Bob Sherwood.

Country cow submarine to replace the one we lost in Mason's stomach acid.

What? A submarine?

That's not gonna get us to space.

No, but the country cow space shuttle conversion Kit will.

Really?

Slow motion? We're kind of in a hurry here.

Oh, come on, it was pretty cool though, right?

Out of my way, cattle.

No offense.

I just said that because you're all dressed like cattle.

Wait, wait, wait. Where are you going?

I'm on a mission.

If the unthinkable indeed happens,

I want to make sure that I'm surrounded by the things that I love.

Oh, are you going to be with your parents, Mr. Laritate?

No!

I don't want to spend my last few hours on earth.

Listening to my mom and dad yelling at me,

"get a haircut, hippie!"

No, I'll be at school, sitting in my beloved cowhide chair...

...Until the end.

Are you ok, Mr. Laritate?

Yeah.

I'm just thinking how much I'm gonna miss.

Watching you struggle to graduate for the second time.

Jerry, did he just say something about Alex not graduating?

Look, our spaceship is set up!

Ok... I'm not going to say goodbye,

Because I know you're coming back.

Well, I guess this is goodbye, old friend.

You and I both know you're not gonna make it back.

Well... We don't have to say goodbye,

Because you're coming with!

Whoa! Your leg grew back!

Now I can finally do this.

There's a new sheriff in town.

Be careful up there. I love you guys.

I'm really proud of you guys.

Thank you.

All right.

Here we go.

Proton, neutron, get gone.