Piranha 3DD

It seems like only yesterday the party would go on forever.

But in just 12 short months,

the place known as America's spring break capitol

has become a virtual ghost town.

Who can forget the devastating attack on Lake Victoria

that left scores of young people dead and a community in shock?

And who could have guessed that this hell on earth

would be wrought by a species of piranha

believed extinct for the last two million years?

A massive eradication program has left these waters,

once teeming with life, silent and dead.

After a massive exodus that left most property abandoned,

the local economy fell into ruin.

Lake Victoria is now a quarantine area.

Only weeds grow on the beaches where thousands once soaked up the sun.

And the only boats that remain are dusty relics littering the shoreline.

As we look back on the anniversary of this tragic event,

we 're left to wonder if it happened here,

can it happen again ?

And if so...

...where?

Sarah!

Sarah!

Hollering ain't gonna do you a damn bit of good, Clayton.

Yeah.

I got my foot stuck in a rut.

There she is, right there. She's dead.

OK. All right.

That's a big old heifer, ain't it?

Yes, she took second place at County last year.

Damn it! What the hell?

Shine the light on her belly. Shine the light on the belly.

Something's going on.

There's something in there.

Holy flying baby shit!

God damn piece of crap!

I got a lighter.

That smell would knock a buzzard off a gut truck.

- Fuck! - That's the gassiest damn cow I ever...

Ow! Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit!

Whoa! Shit!

- Dang it! - Clayton!

Get away!

Aah!

Hey! It's time to get wet again!

- Woo! - Come on down!

Our lifeguards are hot, single,

and ready to party with someone like you!

- You! - Wet 'em down, boys.

So if you wanna cool off, come on down to the hottest hole in town.

- Three words for you... - The Big Wet!

Remember, double D swims free!

Oh, boy. Hold on, cut it, cut it. Cut it.

' Cut.

- Hey. - Hi!

I gotta cut somethin' off at the pass.

Here you go. Keep 'em wet.

And are you guys friends of someone...?

Maddy.

Get over here and give your stepdad a hug.

Chet, tell me you did not fire our old lifeguards

and replace them with... strippers.

- Water-certified strippers. - Really?

- More than that, pumpkin. - Unbelievable.

Listen. Before your sweet mama died, God rest her soul,

she made me promise her to keep this water park running,

and I am just gonna make sure that I provide for you as well as she did.

I'm your daddy now. We're so lucky to have each other.

Wow, Chet.

Sometimes I think you really believe what's coming out of your mouth.

Come here, doll. You are gonna love this.

"Adult Pool"?

Go ahead.

We are gonna make bank on this!

What do you think?

I think this is a very expensive joke.

The world's first strip bar at a water park?

That's a stroke of genius. Franchising, baby.

- No, no, no, no. - Oh, don't worry about that.

You just throw a little extra chlorine

and sulfuric acid in the pool, sanitizes everything.

Hey, Kiki, why don't you get your shapely ass out of the pool.

Russian. Huh? She's a doctor.

Now keep your eyes over there on the flat screen TV.

I call this the "Cooch Cam," but I'm open to suggestions.

Check it out. Oh...

- That's disgusting. Absolutely not. - Do not touch it.

- I'm getting rid of it. - Don't you touch it!

That's not your call.

Don't you forget that I'm still half owner of this place.

Oh, is that right? Raise your hand if you own 51 percent

of this water park

Now raise your hand if you're a 49 percent minority owner.

That's you.

- Hey! Hi, ladies. - Hi, Maddy.

- Hey, Maddy. - How are you? What's new?

Well, this is the summer Shelby finally abstains from abstinence.

- Ah! - Shut up!

She's afraid to have sex

because her slutty cousin gave birth to a flipper baby.

Stop it! You're not supposed to say that.

- That didn't happen. - Ooh, here he comes.

The boy who's gonna pop her cherry.

He just doesn't know it yet.

Hey, Maddy. What do you think of all the new changes around here?

- Josh, meet me at the lake. - Hi.

- Come on. - All right. See ya. Cool.

What, am I the last guy to know you're back?

- Hi! - Hey there!

- How are you? I missed you. - Oh, me too.

Bet you wish you were still in grad school for the summer, huh?

- I can't believe what Chet's done. - I know.

This place is everything to me.

Working here, hanging out.

I know. I miss those moments, too. So, look, now that you're back...

Hey, you guys, are you sure that's such a good idea?

Ho!

Whoa!

There better not be any underage drinking going on here.

- Hello, Kyle. - Hey, come on, man. I'm on duty.

I can't be drinking.

We got fireworks, indecent exposure...

...probable drugs.

Definite drugs.

I may just have to write you up.

Hi, Kyle.

I don't see what he has that I don't have.

Six inches and a badge.

I heard you were back in town,

so I figured I'd stop by and say hey.

And I also feel like I should

say something about the last time we talked.

No, you don't have to. Long-distance relationships, they're weird.

- But you're back now. - For the summer.

Should be an interesting summer.

I... I...

- I'm still on duty, so... - OK.

Welcome back.

I had fun at the party tonight.

Yeah, yeah. Me too.

I love the water.

It's, uh, really...

...wet.

What are you thinking about?

Nothin' much.

Hey, let's take off all our clothes and go swimming.

Uh...

OK, cool. Sure. Yeah, all right.

- Turn around. - Oh, right. Sorry.

Shelby?

Shelby?

Shelby!

- You coming in or what? - Yeah, I'm coming.

No funny stuff, OK?

All right.

You want some of this? You want some, huh?

You're not supposed to splash me back!

- What? - I just felt something against me.

- Is that you? - What? What are you talking about?

Ow! What are you...? What are you doing?

- I didn't... - Well, whatever it is, I don't like it!

I didn't do anything.

Shelby, where are you going?

I'm cold. I'm getting out.

- Wait. You have to do it. - OK, fine.

OK.

Dear Lord.

- Come on. - OK. Dear Lord.

Please forgive us for what we are about to do.

We each know that having relations before marriage is a sin,

but...

...we know that we will be forgiven...

...for it because...

...we're praying about it.

- Amen. - Amen.

- You can fuck me now. - Amen!

Oh, look at this.

Do you like that?

Aw...

Mine.

Ah.

Don't make me cuff the other one.

We're moving, Travis.

- I know, I know. - No!

Look, you idiot!

- Ashley! You OK? - Yeah.

Water's coming in. Shit!

Give me the key for the cuff!

- Uh, it must've fallen out. - Find it! Now!

Where is it?!

Shit, shit, shit, shit. Shit. Damn it!

Where's the key for the damn cuff?!

- I should go for help. - No!

- I can't see anything! I'm sorry! - Ashley!

Hit the dome light and keep looking.

Shit!

What are you doing?! Get over here!

- Ashley! - I'm gonna go for help!

Get back here! What are you doing?!

Ashley! Damn!