Adventure Time

Ugh.

Reduced to marking my camp with bear sweat.

Those bears did not want to give up that sweat,

but it keeps the rodents from nibbling my lumps while I sleep.

Ouch! I feel something crunchy!

Like fried chicken!

Oh, it is fried chicken!

Oh, my glob -- forest creature!

I'd better eat it real fast!

Get back here!

Aah!

What my life has become!

Hello?

Oh, my glob!

Oh, wonderful!

Welcome in, LSP.

Uh, I want to go through --

This place is so clean and nice!

You're so kind.

Do you have a sink?!

Uh, there's one in the kitchen, and --

I'll use the one in the kitchen!

I need to tell you all the s--

Get me a towel!

Help me down!

O-okay, I-I really do need to tell you how to care

for Sweet P.

Uh, there's a proper procedure

for Sweet P's special tuck-in time.

You have to be real sweet to him.

Pat him gently on the head, kiss his cheeks...

What?

...and give him treats.

Sing to him real, real soft and

sweet and touch your forehead to his and think the words,

"You are more precious than anything in this world,

and I will always, always love you."

then he'll fall asleep and have sweet dreams.

Oh, my glob, I'll do all that!

Okay, bye!

Have a wonderful time!

Time to get down to the chill-out!

What a Princess like me deserves.

Aah! Don't hurt me!

I'm Sweet P.

I didn't know you were huge.

I'm hungry.

Okay, let's check what's in the fridge.

Do you like pizza?

I like pizza.

Get the pizza, Sweet P!

Now I can kick back.

Refrigerators are just great!

I never stopped to think how great they are.

Now I'm cold, though.

Oh, What?!

I'm still cold.

Rich-person indoor fire is just so great.

I'm feeling all toasty!

Must be time for toast!

I'm waiting...

waiting...

All done!

It's not black and crunchy like when I throw bread

into my campfire.

This music's way better than owls' hoots.

I deserve this.

No! You're an animal!

You can't come inside!

I'm ready to be tucked in now.

Hello?

Will you be sweet to me?

Sweetness must be out there in the night to guide my

sleepy boat right.

Yo!

Hey, Marcy!

LSPita bread, what's up?

Just chillin' in my awesome bubble bath!

Did you break into someone's house again?

I have a new life now and a career.

I didn't know you had any skills.

Success isn't about skills.

It's about being cool.

These people just randomly approached me, like,

"Hey, we will totally pay you to hang out in our sick mansion

and feed our baby or whatever."

Well, good for you, dude.

I mean, I feel like a totally new person now that I'm finally

getting what I deserve.

Oh, my Glob, what is that?!

Aah!

LSP?

Mm.

Take this, you dandruff!

LSP.

Huh?

You don't belong here in the world of decent people.

You belong in the woods with...

garbage animals!

Noooooooo!

Will you be sweet to me?

[audience booing, shouting]