Jack Brown: Genius

Kaspar?

Huh?

- Master... - Hush, boy.

Thou wilt waken the others. Tread softly.

We must hasten, Kaspar. The sun is nearly upon us.

Whence thou fly heavenward and reacheth thouest devout Father,

wilt thou advise the Lord God of my eternal devotion to him?

I shall indeed, Kaspar. I shall indeed.

Master, wilt thou confirm that the Lord God's beard reaches his midriff?

I shall see it with mine own eyes, Kaspar.

Okay.

'Tis a high perch, Master.

Aye. I shall take to the air like a mighty kestrel.

Master, whence will thou be back?

At the setting of the sun, Kaspar.

In time for vespers.

I will be waitin', Master.

Good lad. Oh, and bring with thee a flagon of fine ale.

Indeed, Master.

Farewell, Kaspar!

Godspeed, Master!

Oh...

Oh, Master. Master.

Thou hast committed self-murder.

Nay, Kaspar.

Thy soul is doomed to a thousand years in Purgatory.

Nay, Kaspar.

I... will... fly!

Merciful Father, take thy child, Elmer,

into the bosom of thy forgiveness.

Hi, and it's another great day here in the capital city here on Pirate Radio.

It's not quite so warm today. Expecting a high of about 36.

Well, we all celebrate Wellington's great win over Auckland

at the cricket once again.

When will those guys learn...

Right now, Jack. All set?

Uh...

Come on, Jack.

Excuse me, girls. Good morning.

Here we go.

That's us.

Mr. Chan, we are incredibly proud of our research.

We've been working on this for the last two years,

and our team has perfected this model.

It is completely energy efficient.

Right. Now, when we're meeting them,

I want you to bow.

Like this. And don't look 'em in the eye.

They don't like it. Come on. Get 'em on, get 'em on.

In fact, this generates enough power

to supply 60 domestic homes.

We've had one running for a while now.

[Mr. Chan speaking Chinese]

Mr. Chan say thank you,

but he must have one thousand time the energy of such a device

to drive his steel mills.

You know, Jack, there are those in life who sniff arses...

and those who have their arses sniffed.

This is-- Oh!

I'm completely confident that--

Good morning. Alan MacGreenberg, Am-Fac Industries.

Picture, if you will, the entire population of Hong Kong

going to work on these.

Allow me to introduce you to Am-Fac's top man, Jack Brown,

and the prototype of his latest invention,

the Bigger Strides.

Revolutionary.

One small step for Am-Fac, one giant leap for mankind.

Nature's energy harnessed for all.

Mr. Chan would like to know, what is the tape recorder?

Jack?

It's the power amplifier. Works the hydraulics.

You see, you can decrease or increase the power like this.

Oh, my gosh!

You bloody idiot!

You've stuffed the Bigger Strides.

I don't believe it. My big break ruined!

What a bloody disaster.

Alan Ian Donald Lawrence MacGreenberg?

Yes.

No.

Bloody tax department.

They're shutting me down.

Bastards!

My empire.

Finished.

When I first came to this town,

I only had one shoe.

And that's all I'll have when I leave.

Tell 'em I'm uncontactable.

- Hello. - I'm not here. I've left town.

This is Miss Wong, calling on behalf of Mr. Chan.

- I'm sorry, Miss Wong-- - Good morning.

Am-Fac Industries, Allan MacGreenberg speaking.

Mr. Chan was most impressed by your demonstration.

Mr. Chan say this machine could be what he looking for.

Mr. Chan say he can purchase your machine

if proper demonstration successful.

Mr. Chan has one hour free. Thursday, six o'clock.

Fine. Perfect.

Thank you. Thank you.

No, thank you. Thank you.

Sayonara, Miss Wong.

Konichiwa.

- Three days? - Fix 'em!

I'll need cadmium bolts, new pistons,

Kevlar, gerelium sheet, titanium.

I've got to replace the superconductors in the power amplifier.

Boss... Boss, that's at least eight grand.

Mmm...

Am-Fac are gonna be a major partner

in revolutionizing the Hong Kong transport system.

I feel tension.

Ah, the Bigger Strides.

Bloody triumph of Kiwi ingenuity.

You shouldn't swear so much.

- I don't do it in front of strangers. - You shouldn't do it at all.

I hope you didn't wear that tie to meet with Mr. Chan.

Hmm?

The silk Yves Saint-Laurent would have been more suitable.

Mmm. I'm gonna make a fortune.

Tourists. They could walk the Milford track in 20 minutes.

I'm gonna get listed on the stock market.

I'll be floating some shares.

There's a killing to be made by somebody.

Somebody will make a wee fortune,

if they've got the courage to invest.

Do friends get first... bite of the cherry?

What are friends for?

How much?

Ten thousand. Maximum five years.

Guaranteed 30 percent over your original investment per annum.

And your money back at the end.

Shit!

Come on. We'll be safe in bed.

We can seal the deal.

Direct Drive, Pseudo Byte,

Seminuclear Physics Monthly and Hang Gliding For Fun and--

What?

Oh, God!

Shit!

Oh...

- -

Dennis?

Dennis!

Dennis!

- Dennis! -

Can't you see I'm closed? Jack!

- - What happened, mate?

- It's my eye. - Eh? Who hit you?

- I don't know. - Come on.

Better get something on that. You'll have a face like a pug's ass in the morning.