Sudzo

Hi. Eugene Cordero here.

They gave me flesh-colored underwear,

so we already know it's gonna be a great day.

Today, we're giving this comedian

a total transformation.

Oh, great.

They have no idea who

or what they're about to become.

Once they see themselves in the mirror,

they'll have to make up a character on the spot,

and then sit down with me for an improvised interview.

What is happening?

This is "Very Important People".

You guys, this is so exciting.

What is happening?

I got a bunch of bubbles on my bald-ass head!

I'm superhero-ish!

My eyes shouldn't be this close together.

It takes away my whole fucking thing.

Please, zoom in on some of the details

of the fact that my ears are missing.

Am I like an island?

Does something live on my head?

Am I mid-bath right now?

Maybe it's the color of the suit.

I weirdly feel dolphin-ish.

I'm straight bleach, motherfucker.

Wee!

I just don't like the bald head.

I think that's what it is.

Vic is a good host.

Vic is a good host.

Vic is a good host.

Vic is a good host.

Vic is a good host.

Vic is a good host.

Vic is a good host.

Vic is a good host.

We all have a story to tell,

and sometimes those stories need

to be shared with the world.

Good evening, I'm Vic Michaelis,

back with another edition of "Very Important People".

Oh!

Wow! What an entrance.

- Thank you. - Absolutely incredible!

Please introduce yourself.

Sudzo!

You may have seen me over the last two weeks.

- I have- - If you didn't

know me as Sudzo before,

you probably, if you're from this town,

know me as Frederick.

This is for you, by the way.

It doesn't have any powers, that's just,

I just brought it. - Oh!

Yeah, yeah, it has bubbles.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Well, fun.

Oh, I never thought to like,

take the bubbles out and then swing at 'em.

- Oh, did you wanna- - Can I grab that back?

- Okay, yeah. Oh, no problem. - Yeah.

So I'll sort of give that back.

These bubbles. Okay.

And we'll take our seat, thank you.

Yeah!

Ah, I gotta get another one of those.

- Sudzo, it is absolutely incredible to have you here.

As everybody knows, two weeks ago, the laundromat incident.

- I was there doing laundry like any normal citizen.

- Sure, unless you have a washer-dryer in your unit.

- Yeah, that would be nice. - Yeah.

And was doing whites.

And that elderly woman put an entire box

of off-brand Tide Pods in her laundry.

I'm watching her do it.

Why didn't you say anything?

- I mean, I wasn't a superhero at the time.

- Well, I mean, you could have just said something.

Why? She's an older lady.

She's figured some of it out.

- The entire laundromat starts filling with soap.

- I thought I was done. I looked over at the old lady.

She was, you know, done.

Yes, she unfortunately passed away,

'cause the hydro cannon sort of blasted her

immediately into the windows.

- Oh, dang. - She did one of these.

- Whoa! - Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It sounds funny.

- It was pretty traumatic for her family, I think.

Oh, sure. Yeah, yeah.

And then bubbles started coming out of my mouth.

- Wow. - I'm able to

create bubbles, I believe, and-

What do you mean you believe?

- Well, I've been trying to create my own bubbles.

The best I could do is like, make one in my mouth-

- Okay. Let's see. - And then hope

that it flies away.

Okay.

Okay.

- Did it go up? - No.

- But, you know, there has to be something,

because, you know, when I woke up

and I realized that I'm still alive,

I looked into the mirror,

realized that I looked completely different

than I did before. - Sure.

- And was hoping there'd be something positive to it.

I lost the ears and everything, and I'm just like-

Oh, I didn't even see that.

Oh no, they're gone.

Okay, how is that affecting things?

Can you hear what I'm saying right now?

Weirdly, I can.

I think I can hear through my mouth

or something now. - Echolocation.

Is that a superpower?

I mean, I guess it could be.

It kind of depends on the range.

Here, let's test it out, all right?

I'm gonna sort of hide somewhere,

and you use your echolocation

to see if you can find me, okay?

So close your eyes.

I'm gonna make it hard.

Okay.

Okay.

Ah!

Ah!

I don't have it.

- Okay, so maybe, so then maybe no on the echolocation.

Yeah, I don't have it.

- I was also really well hidden, so I don't blame you.

And I'm sure that there's lots of other superpowers

- that you could have. - Yeah. Yeah, I mean,

I feel lighter than I used to.

- Oh. - Maybe my weight

has gone down.

Could that be from sort of the stress,

and also, have you been eating much since you transformed?

You know what? No.

Everything tastes like cilantro.

Oh, so then maybe that's it.

I have heard you've sort of shown interest

in joining our regional superheroes, The Justice Folks.

Is that true?

I mean, if I could get with the Folks,

that would be awesome.

- We've got Great Man. He's the hero, he can fly.

He can punch through walls.

You have A-Lady.

- A-Lady is able to like, you know, always be first.

- She's first, she's shattering glass ceilings.

Also a good listener.

And then there's Sandman.

- Sandman, of course, who sort of gathers the sand

and is able to shoot it back out.

Well, you had a meeting last week with Great Man.

I met with Grape Man and Great Man.

Well, Grape Man is famously the head

of the evil cohort, The Bad Folks.

- Yeah, and he's always so drunk on himself.

So right now, we're sort of,

we're taking meetings with everybody.

So I'm taking meetings with both,

just because I'm like, where do I stand?

I figured, let me get a suit,

so my auntie made this suit for me.

It's a great suit.

I kept the colors kind of bubble-esque,

just so if I decide,

not that anybody decides to go bad.

- Sure. - You know, they're just

traumatized by something,

and then, you know, the way

that they handle themselves afterwards feels negative.

Are you considering going bad?

Well, I just feel like I look terrible,

and people respond to me

as a negative thing- - No.

- So then I respond back of saying, "I'm here to help.

If you don't want my help, I can hurt you, I guess."

Oh, 'kay.

But that's just because I'm reacting.

- Well, I can see you're feeling a little bit torn,

so we actually have a personality test-

- Oh. - We would like to help

run on you - Okay.

to sort of see if this can help us

figure out where our feelings

on this lie. - Yeah, yeah, yeah.

One. How would you describe yourself?

Alone.

- Sort of a state of being, rather than a personality trait,

and that's really interesting.

What do you mean?

Like, how I would answer that is,

I would describe myself as a news anchor.