The Big Bang Theory

Space is the mirror of the soul.

Are we looking beyond, or are we looking within?

I'm looking at my shoes.

This is making me a little motion sick.

When we gaze out at the immensities of space,

we understand them because there are immensities

within us as well.

I'm Dr. Rajesh Koothrappali,

and thank you for taking a walk with me...

through the stars.

That pause gets longer every show.

I believe...

you're right.

Hey.

Can I get a picture with you?

Absolutely.

And if you post it on social media,

I suggest the hashtag "Koothra-poet."

Thank you. The show was great.

Well, I can't take all the credit.

I have pretty good co-stars.

The stars.

Do you say that to everyone?

Only to beautiful women.

And okay women.

Okay.

Uh, just to clarify: you're the first kind.

Okay.

Thanks for coming.

What did you handsome gentlemen think of the show?

Uh, you can turn it off now.

It's sweet of you to say, but I don't think I can.

Look at this cute picture of Halley in the bath.

Oh, ho, ho! That's great.

Want me to send it to you?

No, on your phone it's cute, on my phone it's a crime.

I also have a pretty cute picture to share.

What is that?

An equation.

Isn't it perfect?

Sometimes I just stare at it,

and I think "I can't believe that came out of me."

Well, since we're sharing pictures,

I have one to contribute.

Please don't let it be you and your dog in the bathtub.

It's not.

But don't swipe.

What are we looking at here?

Well, that's me and a beautiful woman

and my watch showing the time as 2:30 in the morning.

So, state's exhibit "A"?

No. I met her at the planetarium a few days ago,

and she invited me out for a drink.

Oh, good for you. H-Hey,

w-what's the Hindi word for "dog"?

Kutta. You kutta.

Bow-bow.

That's Hindi for woof-woof.

I am seeing her again tonight.

You know, I also have a date tonight.

But don't worry, it's not another woman.

It's string theory.

Bow-bow.

Sorry, he's a kutta, you're not.

Hi. Hello.

What you doing?

Oh, taking another picture with my baby.

Look how big he got.

It's fun to see you this excited.

Aw, thank you, that's so...

- Don't sit there! - What, what?

I, uh... sorry.

It-It's part of my organization system.

That's-that's where those papers go.

Okay. Um, how about if I just...

slide this notebook...

Eh...

You know what, it's fine. I'll just be in the bedroom.

No, no. Uh, this is your apartment, too.

Uh, look, I'll-I'll stop for the night

and clean this up.

Well, that's very considerate, Sheldon.

I know.

See, I'm trying this new technique

where I imagine how I would feel in someone else's position.

Y-You mean empathy?

Oh, I thought I came up with it.

Well, regardless, I-I appreciate the effort.

Thank you.

It's really hard.

Morning.

Good morning.

Aw, you didn't have to cook me breakfast.

Well, I wasn't sure how I did last night,

and I wanted to finish strong.

You don't need to worry.

Last night was great.

Ah, well, you say that now,

but wait until you taste this.

Oh, my God, this is amazing.

Which is why I keep an omelet pan in the trunk of my car.

Well, thank you, it's delicious.

My husband never cooked for me.

Oh, uh, y-you were married.

Yeah. Well, technically, I guess I still am.

Is that "technically,"

like, the paperwork hasn't gone through,

or "technically,"

like, he's in the closet watching us right now?

No, no, we're separated.

Do you mind if we talk about something else?

Of course.

Uh, you know, my secret to making great omelets is that

I beat the egg whites separately.

Speaking of which, how long have you been separated?

About two weeks.

That is not a lot of weeks.

In fact, that's the bare minimum to get to the plural "weeks."

Doesn't matter.

He moved out, I moved on.

Oh. Good.

Yeah, do you mind me asking what he does for a living?

He's a firefighter.

- Oh. - Interesting.

A potentially jealous man who's handy with an ax.

It's-It's okay, though.

He's almost had two weeks to cool down.

Okay, the next drug is Romatrol.

Oh, I know this one. We're actually

pushing it really hard. It treats mild dermatitis.

Uh, correct. And who can it be prescribed to?

Adults and children who have absolutely, for sure,

stopped growing.

Right again.

And what are the side effects?

Oh, shoot, shoot.

Mm, remember the mnemonic.

Ah... GRAVY, yes. G-R-A-V-Y.

Okay, gastric distress, redness, anal leakage,

vasculitis and yellow eyes.

Oh, uh, so close.

- It's actually yellow discharge. - Oh, right.

That's why we went with "gravy."

Hello.

- Hey. - Hi.

He knows he doesn't live here anymore, right?

Maybe he's experiencing memory loss because he took...

- Flaxitrite. - Yeah.

- Thank you. - Uh, Sheldon, what are you doing?

Oh, I was just checking in on my old room

to see what you've done with it.

Why?

Well, I could use a place to work in the evenings, and...

No. Well, it's just that

there's not a lot of space in our

- apartment... - No.

Well, and I feel like

- Amy's been having... - No.

And since you're not...

No.

- It's... - No.

No.

That is our room now,

and we're gonna turn it into a gym.

Do you really expect me to believe that?

- No. - No.

So I guess what's bugging me

is that they only broke up 13 days ago,

and now I'm dating her.

So, am I, like, the good guy in my movie,

or the bad guy in their movie?

Pretty sure you're the weird friend in our movie.

I like her, okay?

I just, I-I don't know how I feel about

being the third wheel in a relationship.

Says the guy in my bed with my wife.

Guys, I mean, he's around, okay?

He's apparently not happy about the breakup,

and based on the sweatpants he left at her place,

he's, like, a medium to large man.

Maybe those are his "after the holiday" pants,

like you have.

Oh, no. I mean, do you think

it's too soon for her to be dating?

If you and Bernadette broke up,

like, how long would you wait?

- Oh, well, I don't even want to think... - Eight days.

What?

Two days to cry. Six days to hit the gym.

First of all, you already look amazing.

Aw, that's sweet.

I'm gonna give him an extra day of crying.

The answer is still no.

You can say we wouldn't know you're here, but we'd know.

Because you'd be here!

So, who was that?

I can't believe you hung up on me!

What the hell?

What are you doing here?

I am proving you wrong.