Jane the Virgin

Ah, friends, when we last left our Jane,

her world was turned upside down.

See, she was about to move in with her baby daddy Rafael,

- plus... - I was actually planning on proposing.

But then he started to pull away,

leaving our Jane confused and devastated.

Also devastated, Petra.

See, she lied

to her girlfriend J.R. To protect herself,

but then J.R. Found out the truth.

I know

you murdered your sister.

And Petra tried to explain, but J.R. Left her.

That is, until she realized Petra was in real trouble.

And luckily, J.R. Got back in time

No!

And that's not even the craziest part.

The craziest part was...

Well, let's just dive in.

When Jane Gloriana Villanueva was seven years old,

she celebrated her very first day of the dead.

Wait! Are those actual dead people?

JANE (CRYING): I can't believe he's gone.

And so, friends, after Michael died,

Jane did her best to keep him alive.

I just miss him so much.

I miss his laugh .

And the way he used to crack up at his own impressions.

And man, did he love that freakin' cat.

And so, Mateo, that's what this day is all about.

We tell stories to keep Michael alive.

But friends, she didn't expect him

to actually come back from the freakin' dead.

MICHAEL (ECHOING): Bo. Bo.

Bo, Bo, hey. Come here.

Come here, buddy.

Bo. Bo.

Come here. Come here, buddy.

Michael?

Actually,

I go by Jason now, ma'am.

Ma'am?

Uh, Jane.

Right?

He has amnesia.

What?

Amnesia.

What?

Like,

no memory.

You don't remember me?

No, ma'am.

Jane.

Jane, breathe...

Okay. To do this formally...

I don't understand.

You were dead.

He was dead. We buried him.

Rose orchestrated everything.

Michael is alive.

What?

I faked his death.

Tetrodotoxin to slow his heart rate,

and then my EMT drivers took him away.

You wouldn't believe how easy it was

to incentivize a morgue pathologist

with a gambling problem to sign a death certificate.

So, yes.

He lives.

He lives.

Unfortunately, he does

have amnesia, though.

Goes by Jason now.

After Jason Bourne.

I always did love a good play on words.

- H-how did you...? - Electroshock therapy

focused on the hippocampus and temporal lobe.

Until it worked.

Where...

- Is he? - Mm.

I'll tell you where Michael is

when you tell me where Luisa is.

I got a DNA test.

It's him, Jane.

Inhala, exhala, Jane.

Rafael: Go on.

Why don't you tell her your story?

Actually, can you?

Sorry, I'm just not much of a talker, you know?

You should really tell her.

(EXHALES) Well, four years ago,

I woke up in a field in Montana

with no memories.

Um, some lady was there, um,

said I should start over,

so that's what I did.

Didn't you try to find out who you were?

The lady said that I was in

a whole lot of trouble, so...

I didn't know if I was a good guy or a bad guy.

You were a really good guy.

Anyway, I should

take Bo out to do his thing.

- JANE (OVER PHONE): Hello? - We couldn't wait.

Are you engaged?

Oh. No.

But she might be married.

Hon, i-is everything okay?

- Um, can-can you...? - Yeah, yeah.

- Mm-hmm. - Yeah, yeah. Hey, hello?

Yeah.

And so, friends, the story spread quickly...

Michael's alive?

As stories do.

Until it didn't.

To be fair, Petra was also dealing

with an unexpected return.

This whole time, it was you? Get the gun.

Who is it? Who did I just shoot?

My ex-husband.

- Milos. - To remind you...

I can't believe this.

I was just trying to get you in jail,

since you get me in jail.

Not a great one, apparently.

You were going to kill me.

Oh, stop.

- I wasn't going to kill you. - You saved my life.

Just scare you. Maybe...

Shoot off a leg or something.

Wait. Why are you looking like that?

Are you two really dating?

What?

I read all of Petra's e-mails and texts.

Oops, forgot one last reminder.

I thought that was just cover since you were working together.

Now I know why you didn't love me.

You are lesbian.

To remind you, he sold grenades out of the hotel.

- (MOANS) - But sure,

we'll go with the lesbian thing.

I'm calling the police.

Wait.

Are you sure you want to call police

on man that owns

two-thirds of Marbella hotel?

What?

Crazy doctor Luisa put all her shares in trust

and gives to cute little baby ferrets.

I don't understand

It was simple.

Just like Cambridge analytica- Facebook project.

I target Luisa perfectly,

get her to donate to my charity,

and now,

I own hotel.

For my freedom,

I give back to you.

Y-you're actually considering this?

- I can't believe it. - What? No, I-I wasn't...

- You were. I just saw you! - I was... surprised.

: Yes. This guy just tried to kill you.

- I actually don't think he'd kill me. - He should be in prison.

And the fact that you just hesitated

is exactly why I can't be with you.

No, don't-don't, don't say that. I...

I was just surprised, okay?

Here, look, I'm calling them now.

Milos, you're going to jail.

Oh...

Where is he?

It's been over 30 minutes. Do you think he got lost?

Should we go look for him?

I'm... sure that

Jason is fine.

He's just getting air.

Hey, Petra.

- (ECHOING): What? - (HEART BEATING)

Okay, okay, I'm coming.

- Huh? - I have to go get the girls.

Milos is back.

Don't worry, everything's okay.

Oh, my god, okay. Of course, go.

I should wait here for... him.

I'm about ready to hit the hay.

Point me towards a motel?

No, you should stay here.

We'll all stay at my abuela's place.

Okay.

Just for tonight.

Okay.

Ah, yes, how do you say good-bye

to your ex-husband who recently returned from the dead?

Awkward hug.

Good to know.

When Rogelio de la Vega

was 45...

okay, 46 years old,

he prepared himself to see

his best brogelio Michael again,