Baskets

Dale! You're dislodging the toilet!

Aah!

Shit water!

Aah!

I'm home. Oh.

Hey, we found the cat.

He... He was on the bridge that Daddy jumped from.

Probably wantin' to smell him or somethin'.

Why do you hate me so much?

We don't hate you, Mom. We don't hate you, Mom.

Get out.

Mom, we're... we're sorry. Ronnie, not now, please.

You're not welcome here in my home anymore.

Can we at least help you clean things up for you?

No!

What a bunch of crazy drama that was.

She is really upset.

Eh, she'll be fine.

You wanna go to Hooters and get some soup?

Hooters? Uh, sure. I don't have anyplace to be.

Oh. What's this?

Oh, it's Trish.

I leave work for a few days and everything goes to hell.

It's gonna have to be a rain check on the Hooters soup.

Oh. Okay, well.

Not sure what I'm supposed to do, but...

Well, most people have a job, Chip.

Maybe you'd consider that.

Thanks, Dale.

Let's hear it for Baskets the Clown, y'all.

Oh, God. Chip. Martha.

Hey, look, I know you said

not to tell your mom about jail,

but I don't have... I didn't have the money,

and I thought she would have the money.

I... And I didn't even tell her...

Martha, I need a job.

I need a job.

You're rambling on like a crazy person.

Nice to see you. Oh.

How are you? I'm good. Well, nice to see you.

Uh... Okay.

Okay, so what kind of clown jobs are you looking for?

Uh, at this point, anything, I mean,

I'll do theaters, you know, galas,

store openings, fiestas. Birthdays, of course.

Oh, hey, my birthday's coming up in ten months.

I could hire you for that.

Okay, yeah, good. What's the budget?

Well, right now it's in the early planning stages,

but I can look into it. Okay.

How old are you gonna be?

Forty-nine. No what... Not what year you were born.

How old are you gonna be?

I'm gonna... I'm turning 49.

I wasn't born in '49.

Okay, yes, a birthday. Put me on your birthday, uh, thing.

That would be great. What else? What else?

Oh, have you read these stories about these clowns

coming to towns and, like, spooking children?

Yeah, like when there have been...

People have been filling out police reports and stuff.

Yeah, can you see if that's a payed gig?

Um, yeah. I don't know how you do that.

Maybe just go out in the woods?

Like, go look for clowns doing it in the woods,

and ask them if they get paid?

Yeah, but don't get in the way of their work.

Just ask them, you know, is this a payed gig?

If it doesn't pay,

but it could get you really great exposure,

would you be interested?

Now you're thinkin', Martha. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That sounds good. But only go in the woods at night,

because I think that's when most of this stuff is happening.

Don't go during the day. You're not gonna find any clowns or children.

You know what, Chip? I have to say it's great to see you

so enthusiastic about your career.

Yeah, I don't know how much of it is enthusiasm, Martha,

versus just... desperation.

I think I'd just like to function as a normal person for once.

Um, do you want to talk about

what happened in jail, or where you were?

Well, I got mixed up with some squatter types,

and, uh, their leader was a drug addled flautist.

And, uh, I witnessed his body get snapped in half

on a choo choo train.

Okay.

Um...

I'm gonna look into some of the parties and...

Yeah.

The openings and stuff. Yeah, that...

This is off to a good start, Martha.

Oh.

Baptisms. Okay. Got it.

Yeah, but no religious ones.

How much longer will this take?

Uh, hard to say.

Uh, the water damage went pretty deep.

We need to tear the floor open,

check for joist rot.

That smell you're smelling is a combination of mold and sewage,

so we need to see what we can bleach,

and what we need to toss.

If I were you, I'd rip up the sub floors...

Ma'am?

Thanks, Mom, for doing this.

It's like you're home from college.

Except you never went to college.

You're still my baby.

What have we got?

Hi, Chip, this is Martha.

Yeah, Martha. Hi. Hi.

Are you available this Saturday?

Yes, why?

Well, I might have a job for you.

Ooh.

Balloon?

There you go.

Hey. Hi, Martha.

I haven't gotten any complaints,

so I'm gonna go out on a limb and say you're a hit.

Oh. Okay, good. So, what's next?

Well, how do you feel about

taking a shift in the dunk tank?

You said shift, right?

Yeah. Well, I mean...

What's the next, you know, job?

What's the next gig? Oh, right.

Well, um, we have this picnic again next year,

and then I'm still working on the budget

for my birthday party in ten months.

That's it? Well, for right now.

Martha, look, I don't mean to be greedy,

but I can't survive on two days of work a year.

Trust me, I've tried.

Okay, well... Oh, hi.

I'll work my contacts and... Am I still on the clock here?

Yeah. I can turn one more trick?

Sure. Okay, thank you.

Oh. All right. Thanks, manager.

Hi, little lady. How are you?

There you go.

Wh... What the hell? Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Hey, hey. Hey. Excuse me.

Hey. Ma'am? Miss?

My scarves. Hey. Who are you?

My name is Baskets, Baskets the Clown.

Ba... Bassets? Baskets.

With a K. Okay, Baskets.

Nope. Should be on there.

Nope. You're not one of mine.

Who sent you, Family Attractions, Bakersfield Party?

Martha Brooks sent me, of the Martha Brooks Agency.

Okay, listen.

This is a Friendly Fun Events, LLC, event. Okay?

Dunk tank, churro cart,

that's all Friendly Fun Events.

All right? I can't have you just waltzing in here, okay?

I don't know who you are.

It's just that, uh, my manager, she's a...

Where is she? Okay, listen.

Here's my card.

All right? This is my company. There's the address.

Why don't you come by and we can talk about some employment options, yeah?

But I already have a manager.

Doesn't sound like that to me.

Shit, the bouncy castle's sagging. Corky!

Martha! Corky!

Martha?

I know. I know.

Tell her. Tell her.

What's with the barking, huh?

Well, she's telling you. She's saying,

"I'm unhappy I'm not on the table with my mommy."

See? Oh, for goodness sakes.

Now she's up on the table.

Now she's quiet.

I wish Dad were here.

Can you imagine what Dad would say?

Oh, my God, we'd never hear the end of it.

Oh, I shudder to think. Oh.

That's why I like being old,

'cause I don't have your father around to ruin my good time.

Right, little poochie poochie girl?

You're not that old, Mom.

Thank you.

Oh. Go... Uh-oh, she's gonna go.

Go pee on the newspaper, honey.

On the newspaper.

Uh-oh. Too late.

Come here, you little pumpkin.

What's the matter with you?

She's not gonna want to stay here with us.

I like having her here.

Come on. Be a good girl.

Give Mommy a kiss. Give Mommy a kiss.

Have a kiss.

Okay, great. So can you read me

that policy number on the back of that card?