Odd Thomas

My name is Odd Thomas,

though in this age when fame is the altar at which most people worship,

I'm not sure why you should care.

I'm not a celebrity. I'm not the child of a celebrity.

I've never been married to, abused by,

or provided a kidney to a celebrity.

But I do lead an unusual life.

Penny Kalisto.

My name really is Odd.

According to my mother, it was a screw up on my birth certificate.

She says I was supposed to be called Todd, after a Lithuanian uncle.

My father insists my name was always Odd,

and he notes that all of my uncles are Bulgarian.

My father claims my mother is insane.

My mother, of course, begs to differ.

My abilities are a gift from God!

My father won that argument.

I was 12 years old when they finally locked her up and threw away the key.

I've come to believe that my mother and I share certain...

...abilities.

Since I don't want to be locked up with the key thrown away,

I've pretty much kept mine a secret.

Odd Thomas.

Hello, Harlo.

Long time, no see.

Whoa! Whoa! Hey, hey. Come on, man. No touchy, no feely.

Sorry, but I love this car.

I know.

It's too bad a car can't love you back.

Huh?

What's wrong, Odd? There anything I can do?

No, it's something you've already done.

Hey! Hey! Come on, Odd.

No fooling around, man. Give me my keys.

Her blood is in your pocket.

Most people think that's a weird thing to say,

but you don't think it's very weird, do you, Harlo?

On that night... - (CAR DOOR CLOSES)

- (PENNY SCREAMING) - (TIRES SCREECH)

...you took a piece of white felt

and after killing Penny,

you collected some of her blood.

And now it's dry and stiff

and brittle like a cracker,

and it's still in your pocket.

In moments like these, pity tears at me...

And a kind of madness comes over me,

forcing me to hunt people like Harlo Landerson,

who I have no pity for whatsoever.

Sorry, Mrs. Curtees!

- Ah! - Sorry, Saleen!

Oh, my God!

What the hell are you doing?

Mom, what's going on?

Honey... Run, honey, run.

Come here!

My life is filled with guys like Harlo Landerson.

And since I like my face just the way it is...

I learned how to handle myself.

I may see dead people,

but then, by God, I do something about it.

- (SIREN WAILING) - Hey. Hey!

Shift it down, man! Go easy.

I'm sorry, sir, but I don't have a go easy gear.

You should probably get that looked at.

Now, Officer Eckles,

does being a police officer give you the right to beat the shit out of people?

Not at all, Officer Varner.

But it is one of the perks of the job.

(INDISTINCT POLICE RADIO CHATTER)

I believe in a higher power and the afterlife.

Call me strange.

Others do.

He's so strange.

Don't worry, Penny.

I think where you're going is a home for the spirit

and it's filled with kindness and wonder.

I'm sorry, Penny.

I'm sorry your life was so short.

The dead don't talk.

I don't know why.

Here we are again.

Busted furniture and shattered glass everywhere.

- Ah, most of it was not my fault. - Oh.

Except the panda bear lamp...

And the Biffy the clown mirror. That was this guy.

Why didn't you come to me first,

give me a chance to find a way

to get Harlo to entrap himself?

Whenever we do it that way, it's always more efficient and less destructive.

Yes, I know, but he had to be stopped right now

or he was gonna do it again soon.

That's what Penny wanted to tell me.

That's why she hadn't left yet.

Son, you so complicate my life.

Well...

Look...

Besides her blood, Harlo had these photos

of Penny postmortem in his wallet.

If there's any fuss about how you pegged Harlo,

just say he opened up his wallet to pay off a bet.

Five bucks on yesterday's Dodgers game,

the photos fell out, you saw them...

He ran, and, naturally, I gave chase.

Naturally.

Save me! Save me!

Save us! Save us!

- Save us! - Save us!

Save us!

Save you from who?

- (GUNSHOTS) - Who is that?

Who is it?

- (ODD GROANING) - (SCREAMING)

Evil is coming.

And it's up to me to figure out

who's gonna be holding the gun.

Morning, Elvis.

So much of my life is out of my control.

I would have gone seven kinds of crazy if I hadn't simplified.

So I have no motorized vehicles, no homeownership,

no insurance, and no grand ambitions.

- Ladies. - (BOTH CHUCKLE)

Eggs! Wreck them and stretch them!

Wreck them means scrambled,

and stretch them means add an extra egg.

Cardiac shingles and hash browns!

Cardiac shingles are toast with lots of butter.

And hash browns are just hash browns.

Not every word we use is diner lingo...

Whoa!

Just as not every short-order cook

is an undercover detective for dead people.

Duck.

That is Stormy Llewellyn.

Stormy and I are destined to be together forever.

"You are destined to be together forever. "

Hey, Chief. Tummy tickler coming at you.

You know, I'm still not happy about what you did yesterday, Oddie.

You could have gotten yourself killed.

I am not afraid of death.

Of course, I'm not ready to go on a date with him, either.

- Would you throw yourself off a cliff for me? - Of course I would.

- Into a river of razor blades and lemon juice? - Absolutely.

Of course, I'd like to know the reasoning behind such a request,

but, fortunately for me,

you reek of intelligence and integrity.

And you reek of peach shampoo...

Just the way I like you.

- Chief. - Morning, Stormy.

What's with the cat-ate-the-canary smile?

Tonight is date night.

Mmm-hmm. So you think you're gonna get yourself some, huh?

I wouldn't put it quite that way.

Stormy special.

- Girlfriend. - Morning, dude.

I call them bodachs.

Well, not to their faces, I hope.

I never met anybody that could see them before.

Neither have I.

Everyone told me it's in my head.

Well, you should stop telling everyone.

I tried telling my parents.

If I told my parents, I'd have spent my whole life

picking winning lottery numbers.

You can pick winning lotto numbers?

No, I can't. Stay... Stay on point.

Right. Yeah.

Yesterday, when I finally saw one,

I gave him the finger, homes.

Don't you know?

If they find out you can see them, they will kill you.

They will kill you.

Little advice? Yeah?

Karla prefers chocolate to flowers

and you should get yourself some candles.

Candles? Mmm-hmm.

- Thanks. Good idea. - Mmm-hmm.

- Whew, close. - (CHUCKLES)

That would have been a little awkward.

You two are really something.

I don't know what, but something.

We're weird and screwed up, but we're okay.

I don't know. You are...

...so cool.

So, you deny me my weirdness,

but agree that I'm screwed up?

You're right. I see your problem.

Weirdness... It can be fun. It can be kind of cool.