Breaking In

Just four hours of my time gone in a gobble?

Hey, hey. What's up?

Hey.

Hey.

What up?

Oh. Well, look at that.

5 past 9:00. Off to work.

Mmm. Mmm. Mmm, mmm!

My God. I'm having a mouthgasm.

Actually, the chocolate is flooding your brain

with serotonin, which gives you

the same sensation as a sexual release...

Ricky, you're ruining this for me.

How can knowledge ruin anything?

Wait. What? Everybody got one of Molly's cupcakes?

These are Molly's?

Whoa!

Ohh. I would have eaten that.

Are you gonna let that stuffy corporate cog

butter cream you up?

Oh. I see what this is... A little...

I'm not jealous, okay?

I just don't buy that whole nice British act.

She's conning you guys with cupcakes. Wait.

You think she's hot?

She's very... Symmetrical?

She's slave Leia hot,

chained to Jabba for his delight.

My hoochie!

Yeah, I'd tap it.

Uh, okay. Mel, just cut her some slack.

Trust me. It sucks being the new kid in this office.

I have been nice to the girl since the moment she walked in.

So sorry. Uh, Veronica's calling a bit of an impromptu meeting.

If you...

"Uh, so sorry.

"Impromptu meeting. Pip-pip.

Cheerio. David Beckham."

Uh, hello. Jealousy?

In my hands, I hold a stack of beautiful, beautiful money,

and... uh-oh...

I'm making it rain.

Oh. Oh, look at that.

Um... Molly, should I be doing this?

Um, no. And why is that?

Uh, because we're... we're actually quite broke.

Ah, that is correct.

We are flatlining. Whoa. Oh.

But I am here to... "Clear!"

Ooh.

We got a heartbeat.

Yay! The company is alive!

Okay, and how will we do it, you say? Molly?

New clients, and Contra is in desperate need of some.

Great news on that front, ladies. I just landed us a doozy.

And how much money does it pay, dare I ask?

Well, to be perfectly honest with you, it is a pro Bono gig,

- but there are certain hidden benefits. - I'll pass.

- I think you should hear me out. - Pass.

There's somebody there that I would love for you...

Paso doble. Mm.

Now I do have a very long list of rich potential clients,

but I'm not gonna bore you with that right now.

Molly's going to.

Ciao, lovers.

Who here likes going to Las Vegas?!

Oh, dude. Yeah!

Vegas, what?

Excellent, because...

Halfway to Vegas is...

The Crazy Horse Indian casino and leather boot emporium.

Ohh!

They are having major security issues

and need our magic touch.

Well, we are gonna kick the butt out of this job!

I'm gonna put some of my best men on it.

Oh, look. There's some chi over there.

Let me pull it back with my big rope.

Oh, no. Oh, what's happening?

Mei wei, I'm stuck in a box!

Terribly sorry to interrupt your tai chi lesson.

I've noticed that everyone in the office

is now looking to Oz for directions

instead of you, and he's developed this...

This secret code of sorts.

Excuse me, chaps.

Uh, Veronica's requested that you have

a staggered feeding schedule.

That means you both can't go to lunch at the same time.

This means ignore what you're saying.

Per Veronica, no more pornography

on your work computers.

This means he agrees with you.

I'd like you to alphabetize all of your receipts.

And when he taps his chin, it means "Molly sucks."

You know, I may not look like it right now

because I'm in my special chi place,

but I'm actually uber pissed off.

Well, I thought maybe I could arrange a meeting,

um, so you could nip this whole thing

in the bud.

I have an even better idea.

How about a fun little game of good cop, bad cop?

And unless you want to lose your jobs,

there will be an immediate stop to all taps, rubs, and tugs.

And no more of that. I do not suck.

Personally, I am very impressed that you figured out

my little Da Vinci code. I mean, how did you do it?

Oh, well, I-I have this, um,

this whole hyperattentive brain thingy.

Come on, Waldo. Where are you, brotha?

Oh. He's there.

And there.

And there and there.

And I bought this for me!

Anyway, the point is, Veronica is now

the only authority in this office.

Oh, my God. Is bad cop almost done?

V., I just want to say, from the bottom of my heart,

that I am very, very sorry

that we got caught.

From this point forward, anything that happens

in this office I am going to run right through you.

It's here. It's here.

It's here!

220 brilliant-cut diamonds,

hand-sewn onto a buxomy 32c dramatic-lift demi brassiere.

Ohh.

He's a regular bra-fficianado.

Ask him anything.

Uh, have you ever seen one on an actual woman?

This is the pro bono case I was telling you about.

Every year, "Maxim" magazine hires us

to protect their million-dollar diamond boob sling

at their annual event.

Just sounds like gobs of fun.

- Yeah? - Bad cop.

Uh, yes, as I believe we covered earlier in the meeting...

If we're not getting paid,

then we're not taking the job.

Oh, who cares? We're gonna have the breast time.

"The breast time"! Oh, my God. So, so hilarious.

Bad cop.

Yeah, we still can't take the job.

Yeah. Captain bummer over here, right? She's...

The top rung of the ladder has spoken.

We are not going to do this job.

- You know what? Come on, Oz. - We need this! Come on, man.

No, no! No secret signals. I am not touching my nose.

I am no longer in charge.

Hmm-hmm.

Oh, I can't wait to go to this party tonight.

There's gonna be so many models there!

I need another slice.

No, hey, I wouldn't do that if I were you.

Rickey Borten's over there, and dude is a talker.

The last thing you want to get caught up in is the bortex.

But it's the lattice crust that makes this

a classic Dutch-style apple pie.

It's got nothing to do with the apples.

- I mean, Dutch apples... - They don't exist.

It's a total fallacy.

Just let me enjoy this, please.

You should be enjoying it, because this is a really...

What's up, boys?

I see you're diggin' my handiwork.

- You made this? - Yep.

Wow. It's so flaky and competent.

- Why do you sound so surprised? - Because you can't cook.

You use your stove to light cigarettes.

You, missy, have broken into my car

and burgled those pies, you... you pie burglar.

- And there it is. - Slow your roll, Pippa.

No one here knows what you're talking about.

I have read your file.

I know you come from thief blood.

Said the nark who ratted us out

and told Veronica about our secret code.

I am just trying to do my job,

but if you all blatantly break the rules,

then I have to let Veronica know.

Well... Then I guess we won't be

so blatant about it, huh?

My mummy's Timex!

Pip-pip. Cheerio.

God save the queen.

Unbelievable.

I only baked those pies as a... as a nice gesture

because you all have to work so late tonight.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Who... who's working late tonight?

Yeah, how late are we talking...

Like, dinnertime late, 5:00, 5:30 late?

Like, we can leave and go somewhere else late?

Didn't Veronica tell you?

She's booked the Indian casino job,

so we have 900 hours of security footage

to go through.

They think they might have a card counter,

and your job is to catch them posthaste.

Sorry Cruella here is bringing the hammer down.