Hard Eight

What?

Want a cup of coffee?

Want a cigarette?

What?

I'm a guy that's offering to give you a cigarette

and buy you a cup of coffee.

What's your name?

John.

Sydney.

Want to see the menus?

No, I don't think so.

Come from Vegas? Reno?

From Vegas.

You lost some money?

No.

You won some money?

I broke even.

What were you playing?

Blackjack.

You know how to count cards?

What?

You said you were playing blackjack. Do you know how to count cards?

No.

In my experience, if you don't know how to count cards,

you ought to stay away from blackjack.

- Thanks for the tip, Mr. Helpful. - Hey, John.

What?

Hey, John, we're sitting here, I bought you a cup of coffee,

I've given you a cigarette. Hey, John, look at me.

You wanna be a wise-ass, go outside and take a seat.

If you want to talk to me, you want to talk to me...

Well, then.

Never ignore a man's courtesy.

Let's talk about Vegas.

Let's talk about what happened to you,

because something did happen.

Maybe I can help.

You wanna help me?

You look like a man that could use a friend.

You wanna be my friend? Then give me $6,000.

Do you have that? Can you give a total stranger $6,000?

Because that's my trouble, okay?

- What do you need $6,000 for? - I need it.

For what?

To bury my mother.

You went to Vegas to win some money?

No, I went to lose some money.

You went to win some money to bury your mother?

To pay for her funeral?

That is very admirable.

I admire the intention.

I can't say it's wise, though.

Do you have $6,000 to give me?

No, I can't.

I didn't think so.

Isn't there someone who could...?

Nope.

Family?

There's no one else, okay? It's me, it's just, I'm alone

and that's it, okay? There you go.

That gonna be it?

- Uh, yeah. I think so. - Thank you.

How much money do you have left?

Nothing.

If I were to give you $50, what would you do with it?

I'd eat.

How long can you eat, how long can you live on $50?

I don't know.

I would bet not very long.

You would bet.

I tell you what...

You come with me back to Vegas, I'll loan you $50,

I'll show you what you did wrong.

Why? What are...? Look, what are you, man?

You think you're St. Francis or something?

No, I don't think I'm St. Francis.

Are you looking for a fag? I'm not some boy hooker if you are.

I'm not looking for a hooker, John. I'm offering you a ride.

I'm offering to teach you something.

Well, I'll telling you something right now. I don't suck dick, okay?

I understand that. And this is the last time I'll ask.

Do you want my help?

I'll fuck with you if you fuck with me.

I know three types of karate, okay? Jujitsu, aikido and regular karate.

Okay.

Alright.

A, you give me a ride.

Two, you give me 50 bucks.

And C, I sit in the back.

And believe me, if you pull anything, I will fuck you up.

I believe you.

This is a nice ride, actually.

Comfortable.

Can you pull over for a second?

Can I get a cigarette from you?

Thanks.

The lighter, there, it doesn't work. Here.

No, thanks.

Lighter doesn't work.

I heard ya, I just... I just don't use matches.

Wanna hold the wheel a minute while I light mine?

Thanks.

You gonna smoke that?

Nope.

So why don't you use these matches?

It's just a rule with me, okay? I don't use matches.

Why not?

I had a bad experience once, and I promised I'd never use them again.

Tell me.

You know those big monster books of matches,

like those big daddy ones with, like, 40 matches in them?

I had one of those in my pocket once and they just lit, just exploded.

- Matches just went off? - Yeah, it was like...

Something to do with spontaneous friction. They just went off.

I'm standing there in a line for a movie and all of a sudden... wham!

Like that, you know? Scared the shit out of me.

I had a third-degree burn on my leg. It was this close to my dick.

I mean that was a, that was a brand new pair of jeans too, you know?

I mean, I thought about suing that match book company too.

You know, what are, what are ya gonna do?

Things happen. Shit just happens, you know? You just deal with it.

John, I'm gonna loan you 50 bucks.

So, why don't you tell me what you're gonna do with it?

- You asked me before, you know. I... - You could take it and play with it.

Play it a certain way. Long enough and hard enough

to get a bed and a meal.

You're not gonna win $6,000, though.

I can assure you of that.

Well, you, if you show me how to do that, you know,

I mean, how to get a meal and a bed, then I'll do that. You know, I mean,

if you wanna show me.

First thing you do is you go into the bathroom, clean yourself up.

There's an attendant in there has a razor you can use.

- Yeah, but I'm growing a beard. - Once you're done, look in the bar.

- How's that? - Much cleaner.

Okay?

- Much better. - So, what now?

First of all, I lied when I said 50. You're gonna need 150.

I knew it.

Hey, hey, hey. Just relax, John. Listen to me. You listening?

Go over to the slot machines to that woman in the cashier's cage. Ask her

where you can find the floorman.

She'll point to a guy in a tuxedo, the floorman.

You find this guy, you approach him, and you say...

"John Finnegan."

So, anyway, I just, like, I just flew into town, and...

You know, I'm gonna be playing this casino. I like this place.

And I'm gonna be spending some money

and I hope I win some money.

I just need someone to keep track of what I'm spending, you know,

'cause I'm an impulsive gambler And...

can I get a rate card?

I got it. He gave it to me.

Good.

You take this $150.

You take it to that cashier and you cash it in for dollar tokens.

He'll make a note on the card saying the amount and the time of day.

- Hi. - Hi.

I'd like 150 in dollar tokens

and here's my rate card.

- There we are. Good luck. - Thanks a lot.

Now you're gonna find a slot machine. Find one to the side a bit,

but don't go unseen by the floorman.

You sit at that machine and you play $20. Only 20,

so make it last. Play slowly, one dollar at a time.

Did you order a drink?

- Did you order a drink? - Oh, yeah. They're free.

It'll turn out to be a $150 cocktail. Don't drink.

- Okay. Sorry. - It's all right.

- Did you finish that 20? - Almost.

Get your stuff. Come with me.

Give the cashier $100 in tokens. She'll give you cash. Get a bill.

- Hi. - Hi.

I'd like to cash these in, please.

Would you like a bill or some twenties?

A bill.

- There you are. - Thank you.

You're welcome.

Now you're gonna give this cashier the bill and the rate card.

And ask for more tokens.

I'd like another $100 in tokens, please. Here's my rate card.

- Good luck. - Thank you.

So how much do you have on your rate card now?

Uh, well, I cashed 150 first,

then another 100, so, 250.

And you have only spent $20.

So you just keep circling the bill, John.

Cash to tokens,

tokens to cash.

Now, slowly spend what's left of the 50.

That's just for show when the floorman comes around.

Do it for an hour, take a break, do it again for an hour, and so on.

See ya around.

- Where? - I'll find you.

- Hi. - Hi.

Look at that. Started with half of that.

- We're not as lucky. - We're losing big time.

You are?

Yeah, I haven't been playing that one. Put a lot in here, though.

I'd like to cash these in again for a bill, please.