Danny Phantom

SO, DANNY.

YOU AND YOUR LITTLE FRIENDS

WANT TO HUNT GHOSTS.

UH, ACTUALLY, DAD,.

I WANT TO BE AN ASTRONAUT.

SORRY, MR. FENTON.

I WAS INTO GHOSTS,

BUT THEY'RE SO MAINSTREAM NOW.

THEY'RE LIKE CELL PHONES.

WASTE THESE LOOKS AND ALL THIS CHARISMA

HUNTING GHOSTS? CRIMINAL.

WELL, IF YOU DO WANT TO HUNT GHOSTS,

THERE ARE A FEW THINGS YOU NEED TO LEARN.

OH, NO.

THIS ISN'T GOOD.

TRUE, I'VE NEVER SEEN A GHOST,

BUT WHEN I DO, I'LL BE PREPARED,

AND SO WILL YOU,

WHETHER YOU WANT TO BE OR NOT.

IT ALL STARTS WITH YOUR EQUIPMENT.

SAM, TUCKER, THIS IS THE FENTON THERMOS.

IT'S SUPPOSED TO TRAP GHOSTS.

BUT SINCE IT DOESN'T WORK,

AND IT'S JUST A THERMOS,

A THERMOS WITH THE WORD "FENTON" IN FRONT OF IT.

AND THAT? THAT IS THE FENTON PORTAL.

IT RELEASES GHOSTS INTO OUR WORLD,

WHETHER I WANT IT TO OR NOT.

SOMEDAY, I'LL FIGURE OUT HOW THAT WORKS, TOO.

NOW, WHO WANTS TO HUNT SOME GHOSTS?

YOU KIDS. LOOK AT YOU.

YOU'RE TOO EXCITED TO SPEAK.

SO I'LL JUST GO ON SPEAKING.

I WAS BORN MANY YEARS AGO

IN A LOG CABIN IN THE WOODS.

I DON'T EXACTLY REMEMBER WHERE, BUT I DO KNOW I WANTED A PONY.

NEVER GOT THE PONY.

AS A MATTER OF FACT, WE HAD TO EAT HORSEMEAT

DURING THE WAR.

I HAD A PROBLEM WITH THAT.

AAH!

OK, TWO MORE DAYS AND IT'S DONE.

WHAT DID YOU SAY? IT'S DONE?

THE FENTONFINDER IS DONE.

THIS BABY USES SATELLITES TO LEAD YOU RIGHT TO THE GHOSTS.

IT USES WHAT TO TRACK WHAT?

Computerized voice: WELCOME TO THE FENTONFINDER.

A GHOST IS NEAR. WALK FORWARD.

GHOST LOCATED. THANK YOU FOR USING THE FENTONFINDER.

WHAT? THAT CAN'T BE RIGHT.

ACTUALLY, I NEED TO TELL YOU GUYS SOMETHING.

THAT'S NOT ALL YOU NEED, DANNY.

YOU NEED GUIDANCE,

AND PARENTS WHO CAN PROVIDE IT.

SWEETIE, I KNOW WHAT WE DO

DOESN'T MAKE SENSE SOMETIMES,

BUT YOU'RE ONLY--

16. BIOLOGICALLY.

BUT PSYCHOLOGICALLY, I'M AN ADULT,

AND I WILL NOT ALLOW

YOU INSANE OBSESSION WITH GHOSTS

TO POLLUTE THE MIND OF THIS IMPRESSIONABLE LITTLE CHILD.

COME, YOU ABUSED, UNWANTED WRETCH.

I'LL DRIVE YOU TO SCHOOL.

HUH. THAT'S WEIRD.

JASMINE NEVER OFFERS TO DRIVE DANNY TO SCHOOL.

THAT CAN ONLY MEAN ONE THING.

THAT'S NOT OUR DAUGHTER.

THAT'S A GHOST.

DANNY, NO! IT'S A TRAP!

I THINK I SHOULD TELL THEM.

WHY? PARENTS DON'T LISTEN.

EVEN WORSE, THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND.

WHY CAN'T THEY ACCEPT ME FOR WHO I AM?

SAM, I'M TALKING ABOUT MY POWERS.

MY PROBLEMS.

OH, RIGHT. ME, TOO.

IT'S BEEN A MONTH SINCE THE ACCIDENT,

AND I STILL BARELY HAVE ANY CONTROL.

IF SOMEBODY CATCHES ME, I GO FROM GEEK TO FREAK AROUND HERE.

KIND OF LIKE WHAT YOU'RE DOING NOW?

AAH!

DARN IT!

IF MY DAD CAN INVENT SOMETHING

THAT ACCIDENTALLY MADE ME HALF-GHOST,

WHY CAN'T HE INVENT SOMETHING

THAT TURNS ME BACK TO NORMAL?

DANNY, YOUR POWERS MAKE YOU UNIQUE.

UNIQUE IS GOOD.

THAT'S WHY I'M AN ULTRA RECYCLO-VEGETARIAN.

WHICH MEANS WHAT?

SHE DOESN'T EAT ANYTHING WITH A FACE ON IT.

OH, WHO CARES ABOUT THAT STUFF?

DANNY, TWO WORDS: MEAT CONNOISSEUR.

LAST NIGHT,

YOU HAD SLOPPY JOES.

IMPRESSIVE.

MEAT HEIGHTENS THE SENSES,

AND MY ALL-MEAT STREAK IS 14 YEARS STRONG.

AND IT'S ABOUT TO END.

THE SCHOOL BOARD FINALLY AGREED TO TRY

A NEW CAFETERIA MENU.

I WORE THEM DOWN.

WAIT. WHAT DID YOU DO?

WHAT IS THIS? GRASS ON A BUN?

WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?

TUCKER, IT'S TIME FOR A CHANGE.

OOH! SOMEBODY CHANGED THE MENU!

MAYBE THIS IS A BAD IDEA.

NO, IT'S PERFECT.

WHEN JAZZ GETS HOME,

WE SUCK THE GHOST OUT OF HER

WITH A FENTON XTRACTOR.

BUT WHAT IF JAZZ ISN'T A GHOST?

WHAT IF WE ACCIDENTALLY HURT HER?

MADDIE, THE FENTON XTRACTOR DOESN'T HURT HUMANS.

UNLESS IT GETS IN YOUR HAIR.

AAH!

SEE?

DON'T YOU THINK THIS IS A LITTLE EXTREME, SAM?

AH, MISS MANSON.

THE SCHOOL BOARD WANTED ME

TO PERSONALLY THANK YOU

FOR USHERING IN THIS WELCOME EXPERIMENT TO OUR CAFETERIA.

MEAT. NEAR.

NO, NO. THE RUMORS ABOUT

THE NEW ALL-STEAK BUFFET

IN THE TEACHERS' LOUNGE ARE COMPLETELY UNTRUE.

THANKS AGAIN.

YEAH. THANKS AGAIN FOR MAKING US EAT GARBAGE, SAM.

IT'S NOT GARBAGE. IT'S RECYCLABLE ORGANIC MATTER.

Danny and Tucker: IT'S GARBAGE.

UH, GUYS, I'VE GOT A PROBLEM. AAH!

Boy: FENTON!

MAKE THAT TWO PROBLEMS.

I ORDERED 3 MUD PIES.

DO YOU KNOW WHAT THEY GAVE ME?

3 MUD PIES.

WITH MUD. FROM THE GROUND!

ALL BECAUSE OF YOUR GIRLFRIEND.

SHE'S NOT MY GIRLFRIEND.

I'M NOT HIS GIRLFRIEND.

UH--AAH!

THESE ARE THE BEST YEARS OF MY LIFE.

AFTER HIGH SCHOOL, IT'S ALL DOWNHILL FOR ME.

HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO ENJOY MY GLORY DAYS EATING MUD?

ACTUALLY, IT'S TOPSOIL.

WHATEVER!

EAT IT. ALL OF IT.

UH...

UH...

GARBAGE FIGHT!

IT'S NOT GARBAGE, IT'S--

YOU'RE GONNA PAY FOR THIS, FENTON!

GREAT. I'M STILL HIS FAVORITE.

HUH. SHOULDN'T BE SO BAD.

SHE LOOKS A LITTLE LIKE MY GRANDMOTHER.

SHOULDN'T SHE BE HAUNTING A BINGO HALL?

HELLO, CHILDREN. CAN YOU HELP ME?

TODAY'S LUNCH IS MEATLOAF,

BUT I DON'T SEE THE MEATLOAF.

DID SOMEONE CHANGE THE MENU?

YEAH. SHE DID.

YOU CHANGED THE MENU?

All: AAH!

THE MENU HAS BEEN THE SAME FOR 50 YEARS.

GET BEHIND ME.

WOW. I FEEL SAFE.

I'M GOING GHOST!

I COMMAND YOU TO GO AWAY.

WELL, IF THIS SUPERHERO THING DOESN'T WORK OUT,

I CAN HAVE AN EXCITING CAREER AS A BUSBOY.

I CONTROL LUNCH.

LUNCH IS SACRED.

LUNCH HAS RULES.

ANYBODY WANT CAKE?

TOO BAD.

CHILDREN WHO CHANGE MY MENU

DO NOT GET DESSERT.

HEY, IT WORKED!

THIS IS THE THANKS I GET

FOR THINKING LIKE AN INDIVIDUAL?