Hollyweird

- Hollywood: deep, dark.

That source of infinite entertainment, wonder and mystery.

Home for the beautiful, the ugly,

the rich, the poor and the weird.

In the following film, you will experience individuals

whose lives dwell beyond the boundaries of understanding

and may appear unusual, freaky and bizarre.

Man is an animal of compassion and evolution.

What we don't understand we can learn from.

What you're about to see is an eye-opening journey

into the underbelly of Hollywood.

Porn stars, freakshows, transvestites and fire eaters

exist among the rich and famous

as an integral part of the entertainment industry.

These are the underdogs, the unsung heroes of the business.

Join our host Dark Infinity as we begin our journey

at the California Institute for Abnormal Arts

where Carl Crew gives a tour of many of the freaks

and oddities that await you behind their alluring doors.

Welcome to "Hollyweird."

- My name's Carl Crew and I am a writer,

an actor, producer and do a mean soft shoe

and many, many things.

I was a mortician.

I had an antique store in Haight-Ashbury.

Basically I grew up in a repertory theater group

from a kid 'til I was like 20 for like 17 years.

And I studied film and I decided to move to Hollywood.

And I got down here.

Six months later, I got my firstlead role in "Blood Diner."

And I actually met

one of the producers, Bill Osco

who was famous for such wonderful hits

as "Alice in Wonderland: X," which was really R back then.

And "Flesh Gordon".

He was like 23 and he made like 23 million dollars

like 50 years ago.

I mean you know what kinda money that is?

He moved into the Bee Gees mansion.

You know, like wow.

Anyway, so we started makin' movies together.

I did one more movie with

Jackie Kong and Bill Osco.

They were married.

It was called "The Under Achievers."

Originally "Night School," but they had to change the name.

But my costar Rick Burkes, brilliant actor.

Fantastic.

He was "Blood Diner."

We got two little roles in "Under Achievers."

And then I started writing, producing

and making my own films with Bill Osco.

"Gross Out," "Urban Legends," "Lunch with Larry."

And we were talking on the phone one night

and he's going, "You know what?

"You look exactly like Jeffrey Dahmer."

I'm like, "I'm gonna punch you."

And then I go, "Huh."

And then I literally got on the computer

and I found the police interviews with Jeffrey

and I wrote the script

for "Jeffrey Dahmer: The Secret Life."

And we immediately got funding for that and we did it.

We did it in secret.

That's what I told the trades, you know.

I said, "We're shooting this in secret."

And my fax machine explodedwith 20,000 faxes in one month.

Literally, there was a puff of smoke coming from it.

If you ever wanna do something and get it out there,

you tell people you're doing this part in secret

for whatever reason andeveryone go out and talk to you.

But that got a lotta press.

It never was released in the theaters though.

It just went straight to video,

but we had just a lotta, lotta, lotta pressure.

We did "Maury Povich" and we did "Milwaukee's Talking."

I literally got interviewed

at Jeffrey Dahmer's apartment door

and I reached out and touched the door.

Next day the papers, "Oh yeah, that Carl Crew.

"He made love to Jeffrey Dahmer's door."

I'm like, "Wow, this is hilarious publicity."

The director was pissed.

He was like, "No, that's terrible."

I go, "Relax.

"Publicity's publicity."

Then when we did "Milwaukee's Talking,"

the family would kind of, you know.

Of course a movie's gonna be made

about one of the most heinous serial killers.

So like we settle them down.

By the time we got to "Maury Povich,"

they had whipped 'em into a frenzy.

So it was the "Barbecue Carl Crew Show."

Which I'm a debater and I loved it.

But I got called Jeffrey Dahmer number two

you know, and all this stuff.

Actually I have a Facebook page Facebook.

It's called "Jeffrey Dahmer: The Secret Life"

and it's about the film

and the archived "Maury Povich" is on there.

If you want a cheap thrill.

But then I got involved with making.

Well I got involved with Chris Miller.

We did a bunch of films together, not lead roles.

I've always had lead roles.

But for a while I was so busy with this club

we've had for 25 years,

California Institute of Abnormal Arts.

We're still here after 25 years.

Freakshows, magic shows, puppet shows.

We have a museum.

We're in the Ripley's hardback book last year

because I have three dead bodies from 100 years ago.

I used to be a mortician.

I lived in a mortuary for five years and I know the rules.

Pre-1925, I don't need a permit.

So I have a dead clown and two dead Chinese magicians.

Yup.

I'm sorry? - Freakshow in St. Louis?

Say again?

"Freakshow: Los Angeles" the book.

- Oh, that was a book that got ruined.

This is the original book, okay?

And it's 500 pages.

It's full color and this guy did a deal with me.

He's like, "Yeah, we're gonna publish this book."

And he put it down to 200 pages

and he screwed it all up and made blank pages

so you could write notes like what are you doing?

And finally his company went bankrupt

and I got my rights back.

It was ridiculous.

I was furious when I saw it.

But yeah, this is literally about 18 years

of all the press, all the publicity, the whole story.

Every freakshow picture,

every flyer ever designed from 25 years.

Hold on.

I'll wait for this to go by.

Oh, it's good.

Anyway, yeah.

So I did it on CreateSpace and we got like 300 copies

and it cost me $39 a book to print.

And we had to sell it for like $45, you know?

It's like a textbook.

But I got the deal with Amazon.

They go, "Oh yeah, we'll give you some money

"for every book."

I go, "Really, how much?"

Goes, "A penny."

I'm like, "No."

The club started here and we got some really amazing people

attracted to their club.

A friend of mine was a producer and he goes,

"Dude, I have to show you something."

And I said, "What?"

He showed me this DVD of a thing

called "Happy Turkey Day" with Shaye Saint John

and it literally blew my mind.

I didn't know what I was lookin' at

and I said, "I have to meet this person.

"Whoever these people are, I have to meet them."

So he gave me Eric's number and I called him up.

And we struck it off and he came over here

and he introduced me to Shaye Saint John

who was

an enigma.

They were two separate people, Eric and Shaye.

I worked with them both for 10 years.

Shaye was a handicapped.

Well she was in a train wreck.

She was put into a military hospital.

And they have been doing all this MKUltra stuff there

and they thought they killed her.

They did the most implantation they've ever done on anybody.

There were cool people in the hospital

that snuck her out and hid her in an art colony

and that's where my friend Eric met her.

And so he would bring her over here

and we would give her some props and wigs and whatever

and set her up with some.

Very hard to talk to her.

She talked like this, .

I mean it was like

and she wore a wig mask over her face.

When go into a wig store,

the same face that's on all the wigs, that was her face.

In other words, she bought 100 of those

'cause she was disfigured.

I've never seen her face and I worked with her for 10 years.

No one has ever saw her face.

She was in a wheelchair.

She had to have her arms and legs amputated

because of the lack of flow of blood or whatever.

And she didn't want prosthetics,

so she used mannequin arms and legs.

She was just a movie star.

She thought she was a movie star.

It was like so bizarre.