Edward Scissorhands

Snuggle in, sweetie! It's cold out there.

Why is it snowing, Grandma? Where does it come from?

Oh, that's a long story, sweetheart.

- I wanna hear. - Oh, not tonight. Go to sleep.

I'm not sleepy. Tell me, please.

Well, all right.

Let's see...

I guess it would have to start with... scissors!

Scissors?

Well, there are all kinds of scissors.

And once there was even a man who had scissors for hands.

- A man? - Yes.

- Hands scissors? - No, scissor hands.

You know the mansion on top of the mountain?

It's haunted.

Well...

A long time ago...

an inventor lived in that mansion.

He made many things, I suppose.

He also created a man.

He gave him insides, a heart, a brain, everything.

Well, almost everything.

You see, the inventor was very old.

He died before he got to finish the man he invented.

So the man was left by himself,

incomplete and all alone.

He didn't have a name?

Of course he had a name.

His name was Edward.

Avon calling!

- Weren't you just here? - No, not since last season!

Today I've come to show you our exquisite new line of softer colours, in shadows,

blushes and lipstick.

Everything you need to accent and highlight your changing look.

My changing look... That's good!

I also have a complete selection of your old favourites,

those tried and true products we've all come to depend on year in and year out.

Come on, Peg, I never buy anything from you.

I know. Bye, Helen.

Um, you didn't have to call me, ma'am. You could have taken care of this by yourself.

I could? I don't think so.

It's easy. Your food trap's clogged, that's all.

See this bolt here? You just unscrew this...

Mm-hm...

And out she pops.

On TV they say you repairmen are a lonely bunch.

Housewives get lonely too, though you may

not realise it since they haven't made an ad.

And then you just take this and put it back in

here nice and easy. Be careful not to force it.

And then you just screw this back on.

Oh, now who could that be?

Will you excuse me for a moment?

Now, don't go anywhere. I'll be right back. This is fascinatin'!

I wouldn't wanna miss a moment of it!

- Good morning, Joyce. Avon calling! - Why, Peg...

Have you gone blind? Can't you see that vehicle in my drive?

Oh. Yes.

Don't you realise that means I'm busy?

OK, now we should decide on lipsticks.

OK, dear, did you like the Winsome Wahini, which looked charming on you,

or the Bahimini Bliss?

- I like 'em both. - Well, great!

You don't actually think I have any money, do you?

Ding-dong! The Avon lady!

Just not my day.

Oh, my goodness!

Oh, it's so beautiful!

Hello?

Hello?

Hello? Avon calling!

Oh, my!

Hello?

Hello?

I'm Peg Boggs. I'm your local Avon representative. Hello?

I... I'm sorry to barge in like this, but you don't have any reason to be afraid.

Ooh! This is some huge house, isn't it?

Thank goodness for those aerobics... classes.

Hello? Hello?

Why are you hiding back there?

You don't have to hide from me. I'm Peg Boggs.

I'm your local Avon representative

and I'm as harmless as cherry pie...

Oh, my!

I can see that I've disturbed you.

How stupid of me. I'll just be going now.

Don't go.

Oh, my!

What happened to you?

- I'm not finished. - Ohh!

Put those down. Don't come any closer. Please...

Those are your hands?

Those are your hands!

What happened to you?

Where are your parents? Um...

Your mother?

Your father?

He didn't wake up.

Are you alone? Do you live up here all by yourself?

What happened to your face?

I won't hurt you.

At the very least, let me give you a good astringent.

This will help to prevent infection.

What's your name?

Edward.

Edward...

I think you should just come home with me.

Ohh!

- I'm... I'm sorry. - No. No, don't be.

You go ahead and look. You have every reason to be excited.

Oh! You OK?

You OK?

Hello?

Hi. Yeah, it's Marge.

I was standing outside talking to Carol,

and Peg drove by. She had somebody with her.

- Did you get a good look at him? - No, I didn't.

Did she say anything to you about having a guest?

Nothing at all. She rang my doorbell at the crack of dawn.

No... OK, I'll meet you on the corner.

Right. Bye.

Oh! Damn!

Here we go, dear. This is our house.

You can just go right in and make yourself right at home, OK?

We'll have something to eat or drink, or... Whatever you...

Here, dear. Here we go. This is the front door. Here we go. Right in here.

Joyce? I just saw this strange guy drive in with Peg. I didn't get a good look.

He looked kinda pale.

On my way. Don't do anything without me.

Yes! Be right there!

Here we are.

So... um, this is the living room and back here are the bedrooms.

You want to see the pictures? All right.

Well, this is my husband Bill. He's a bowling champion.

Do you know what bowling is?

Bowling?

No. Well... Here they are down at the lake, fishing.

I think Kevin looks a little glum because they didn't catch anything that day.

And, um... here's my daughter Kim.

All dressed for the junior prom.

She's a senior now, if you can believe it!

She's camping in the mountains with friends,

but she'll be back in a few days. You can meet then.

Isn't she beautiful?

That's my family.

Come along. I'll show you the rest of the house.

Then you can just freshen up and make yourself at home.

That's the kitchen over there. Help yourself to anything you want.

Those are grapes. And, um... back here are the bedrooms.

Let me get you some towels and I'll see what we can find for you to wear.

You know what? I think I have some of.

Bill's old clothes in here. This is perfect!

Here. These should just fit you.

Oh! Don't be alarmed. That's just the phone.

Now you can go in Kim's room and put these on, and I'll be right with you.

No, no, scissors. No, scissors.

That's right. Well, he was... born up there or... something.

Have you seen him before?

No, I doubt he's ever been off the grounds.

Then how did you ever get together with him?

Listen, I have to go now. I'll talk to you later, Marge. Bye-bye.

Sorry, Edward, I didn't...

May I help you with this?

Thank you.

There you go. Oh dear, you've cut your face.

Here. Let me just get this right off.

- Does that hurt? - No.

Good. OK. Now, let's get you dressed.

OK...

There we go. Very fine!

You look fine, just fine!

Helen, come on! She wouldn't wait for you.

I've got rollers in my damn hair!

OK...

Now, what did I do with my sciss...?

Edward, um... would you?

Thank you.

You know, I have a doctor friend who I think could help you.

- Really? - Yes.

Now, I can help with the scars...

But I just wanna consult the big Avon handbook before doing anything.

Kevin!

Kevin!

It's not polite to stare, dear.

Think how it would make you feel if somebody were staring at you.

- I wouldn't care. - Well, I would, so don't do it!

Well, this must be quite a change for you, right, Ed?

- Edward, dear. I think he prefers Edward. - Oh, sure.

So what have you been doin' with yourself

up there in that big old place? I bet the...

I bet the view must be spectacular, huh, Ed?

Edward!

Yes?

No, I... I just...

See all the way to the ocean, I bet, huh?

Sometimes.

Bill, could I have the salt and pepper, please?

Bill, dear, could I have the salt and pepper, please? Thank you.

Kevin!

Kevin!