The Girl Next Door

Hey David, it's Charlie Franklin calling to say happy birthday.

Sorry I couldn't get those tickets, man.

I know you were counting on me, but my brother-in-law's in town.

I'll give you a call you next week, and maybe we can get together.

Have a good birthday. Take care.

If you wanna reach me on my cell, you can...

You think you know about pain?

Talk to my second wife.

When she was 19, she got between a couple of fighting cats.

And one of them went at her. Climbed her like a tree.

Tore gashes out of her thighs and breasts and belly, that you can still see today.

She got 30 stitches, and a fever that lasted for days.

My second wife says...that's pain.

She doesn't know shit, that woman.

If I could have stepped in front of that car today, in the place of that man...

I would have.

Perhaps for a moment, bearing his pain may have numbed my own.

It was the fifties.

A period of strange repressions...secrets.

A time when even the guilty displayed a rare innocence.

Remembering what happened.

Remembering what we did.

I'm on the wrong side of fifty, now.

I make $300,000 a year on Wall Street...

two marriages, no kids...

a house in Rye, a company apartment in the city

My preseant wife knows nothing about what happened all those years ago.

And I don't know if I mean to tell her.

Why should I?

Nothing in my life has been right, since the summer of 1958.

When Ruth, Donnie, Willie, and all the rest of us met Meg Loughlin...

and her sister Susan.

Whatcha looking for?

Crayfish. - Can I see?

I'm Meg. - I'm David.

They're really neat.

Jus' catch them and look at 'em a while, then let them go.

Do they bite?

The big ones do, but the little ones try and run.

Ah!

You never seen a crayfish before?

We don't have 'em in New York City. We do have lobsters, though. Now, they can hurt you.

Can you keep one like a pet?

No. You eat them silly.

Peoply eat crayfish too.

In Louisiana and Florida, someplace.

Doesn't look like there's a lot to eat.

Let's try and get some big ones.

Can I try? - Sure.

What's that?

My family, they were in an accident.

Got any more of them...scars, I mean?

A few, but that ones the worst.

Can I see 'em?

I got one. I got one. -You got a big one.

First try...

Good boys. Sometimes they kill their own kind, you know?

You'll put 'em back though, won't you? - Sure, I always do.

I gotta get back.

But I wanted to look around, first thing.

We had never had a woods before.

Thanks, David, that was fun.

Hey, back where?

We're staying with our cousins, the Chandlers.

The Chandlers? We're neighbors. - See you, David.

One more day at your sister's and, I swear, I would have asked someone to... bring out the white coats.

David, you wanna lend a hand?

Hey Woofer. - Hi, Dave.

What's in the can? - Nightcrawlers.

Is Donnie around? - Yep.

Sick, Woofer. That's really sick.

Got some black one's too.

Gonna collect 'em and put 'em in with these guys here. Start an ant war.

Want to bet who wins?

The red ants will win. Red ants always win.

Olly olly ox in free.

Hey geeks, it's me.

You guys there?

Gotcha!

That wasn't funny, dufus. - The look on your face sure was.

Hey, give me a hand here, will ya.

Race to the top.

Dork. - Homo.

So you've met her. - Who?

Oh, your cousin. Yes, down by the rock.

She caught a crayfish, first try.

Yes, she's pretty good at stuff.

Cute too, ain't she? - Shit, your own cousin?

Second cousin. Mom says it makes a difference.

So what's her sister like? - Susan? Like nothin.

She got really messed up in that accident.

She has to walk with those, uh, what do you call 'em...

The things, kids with polio wear 'em.

Both parents died too.

Mom said they must have died instantly.

Mom says they didn't even know what hit 'em.

Fact is, what hit 'em was a goddam Chrysler.

Anyhow, that's why we got 'em.

Mom says Meg's the lucky one. She said Meg got off easy.

What are you two dorks doin' here?

Goin' down to the carnival. Carnies set up this morning.

Gonna go see 'em set up.

Another summer of kiddies and carnivals. Whoop-te-fuckin'-doo.

Oh look, it's dufus and David.

Shut that trap of yours, before I shut it for you.

Dad wants to know where you're going. He says you're grounded.

Tell Dad to stick it up his ass.

Now you're really gonna get it. I'm telling.

Do it, and I tell him what I caught you and Cheryl doing with your pillows the other night.

Hey, guys. - Hi Willie.

Have fun at the dentist? - Shut up, moron.

Mom's pissed you left. Says Woofers tearin' up the garden and you were suppose to babysit him.

I've had it with you kids. Time to find me some real action.

It's summer. So, why haven't we played the game?

Are you sure she can't see nothing? - She can't see shit.

Get ready to run. The big tree is the safe zone.

1,2,3...24,25

Eddie, stop it. I know thats you. - Shut the fuck up.

19,20... ...39,40!

Bitch, bitch, bitch.

Oh, Shit!

Brown Pony!

Capture!

Now what? - Now...she has to confess.

Only Lila get's to play. The rest of us just watch. - Me first.

Now tell the truth.

Have you ever kissed a boy? - No. But you have.

Tell us how you and Cheryl play with yourselves.

We didn't. - Liar.

Have you ever sucked dick?

A big, long, pussy-pounding dick?

No! Stop it. I'm telling Dad.

What is it?

Tell us what you bitches really did with those pillows.

Hi, Meg. - Oh, Hi David.

It's neat, huh.

It's beautiful.

Want to give it a try?

If you wanted to, I mean.

If you're too scared to, I...I don't mind.

Sure.

C'mon.

I feel like I could just fly off and see the whole world from here.

My parents...

I know they always meant to take us someplace like Playland or Atlantic City.

Just never got around to it, I guess.

I heard about what happened.

I'm sorry.

David, this is... ...is...this is amazing.

You ride like a real pro.

You mean it?

Sure.

I've got two more tickets, if you want to go again.

Oh, I'd love to.

But I have to get back early, Ruth said be home early.

She can be kind of funny sometimes.

I know, Ruth's great, just like one of the gang.

I'll tell you what's missing from that goddam carnival, is a good old-fashioned hoochiecoo.

What's a hoopiecoo, ma?

Hoochiecoo. You know, the hoochiecoochie...

Dancing girls, Ralphie.

That...and the freak show.

When I was your age, we had both.

Once I saw a man with three arms. - There ain't no such thing.

Don't contradict your mother. I did.

I saw a man with three arms.

One of 'em, just a little bitty thing, comin' outta here.

What else? What other stuff did you see?

Things in bottles.

Stillborns.

Little shrunken things. Cats and goats, all kinds of things.

I tell ya, the carnval was somethin' when I was a girl.

So tell us about this hoochiecoo.

Yeah.I still don't get it. What's it supposed to be?

I told you. It's dancing girls.

Some of 'em half naked, too. With skirts up to here...

and little teeny brassieres.

Maybe just a ruby in the belly. With dark red circles pain'ted

Here and here.

What do you boys think of that?

Suppose nothing like that's ever gonna be sponsored by those little kiwanis, is it. Not those boys.

But, they'd like to.

Hell, they'd love to.

But they've all got their wives.

Finish up your beers, boys.

Time to get going to that carnival.

Don't want to miss the last night.

Meg! I'm takin' these boys out for a Mr. Softy at the carnival.

You stay here and look after your sister.

And stay out of the ice box.

Can't have you getting fat on us.

Especially if you ever want to do the hoochiecoo.

Yeah, I heard that one.

Maybe I read it in Playboy.

You read that in Playboy and I fucked Debra Padgett.

My old man buys it every month, ass-lick.

I heard theres one with Jane Mansfield? - Yeah, I saw that one.

The biggest tits I ever saw. - Bigger than Carol Baker's?

Bigger than June Wilkinson? - Shit, bigger than Willie's.

Where's Donnie?