Search Party

So, you want to know the truth.

Well, this is the truth.

[ Car door closes, police radio chatter ]

Officer: I'm telling you, it's Lieutenant Einstein, okay?

Einstein has the biggest feet at the dispatch.

Officer #2: No. He buys big shoes. It's an optical illusion.

Why would anyone buy shoes that are too big for them?

Because he wants you to think he's got big feet. It's a ruse.

What's the difference? He does have big feet.

I saw them in the locker room. Okay. So what?

I'm telling you, man, they're like pizza slices.

They're huge feet.

We were all involved.

Can you find who killed him?

Dory: Well, it's not like I meant to kill him!

Drew: But you did!

He's got the biggest dick at the dispatch.

You know what? I don't need to hear this. You're jealous of him.

What? You didn't see my dick.

I've seen your dick. You got a thumb.

Let's go.

Officer: Damn this thing.

Gets sticky.

Maybe the battery's dead.

Acting pretty calm for a murderer.

I'm not a murderer.

Well, you're acting pretty calm

for someone wrongly accused of murder.

Officer: One purse, set of keys,

one New York State driver's license.

One cellphone,

one credit card,

one deep-red lipstick.

Five bobby pins --

the little kind.

And, uh, one --

Oh, man.

It's a cassette tape.

They're so useless now.

It's cute, though.

God damn it!

What happened?

This system sucks!

I log the thing in, I press return, like they said,

and guess what -- it disappears.

Piece of shit!

Just leave everything on the desk for now.

Got to call that old bitch to come fix it.

Okay.

Do you want your phone call now?

Uh...yeah.

Yeah, sure. Whatever I'm allowed.

Okay.

Come on. This way.

Here you go.

Mm, I don't know any numbers off the top of my head.

Could I just look at my phone for a sec?

You've obviously never been arrested before.

No, you can't have your phone!

You don't know a single phone number, huh?

A boyfriend? A friend? Anybody?

I do know... one number by heart.

There you go.

Man: I'm gonna ask you once more.

Do you see me?

Woman: I don't know what you mean.

Yes, you do!

Do you see me, Amy?

I see you!

Oh! I see you!

No, you don't!

Oh, God!

Dory: Gail? Gail? Are you there?

Yeah. Dory, shh! Shh!

I'm trying to hang up, okay? Stop.

No, no, no! Don't hang up on me, Gail!

Gail, listen.

I've been arrested.

For murder. It's insane!

What?!

Man: Shh! Murder?!

Woman: Did she say "murder"?

I know. I-I can explain everything.

I just -- I need you to come to the 85th precinct.

Okay?

I can help out if the bail is small,

but I don't really have access to real money Man: Shh!

until the divorce is settled.

You know?

Yeah. That -- That's fine. Okay?

J-Just -- Just please figure something out, okay?

Okay. Okay. I got it.

Shut up! My son's in this movie.

Dory, Dory, can you hang up?

Because my watch phone won't hang up until you do,

and there are a lot of people

who are really angry with me in the theater,

even though they're the ones that are yelling!

Yeah.

Thank you so much, Gail.

Which one is he? Shut up!

Man: I...see...you.

Portia: Then yesterday, you were like,

"I don't think there's any such thing as a bad idea."

I hate to do this to you, but I have to tell Drew. What?

Why?! I have to tell Drew what you said.

I just -- I just think you're being --

Where's Dory?

I don't know. I've just been waiting here for everybody.

Okay. Okay. Drew, settle an argument. God!

What did Dory mean when she texted, "I paid the debt"?

No, Elliott! Just stop! Just drop it.

I assume she meant that she paid off April.

Mm-hmm. There you go. See?

Yeah.

When I read the text...

exactly -- that's what I thought, as well.

That's not... what you thought.

What -- Uh, what else could it be?

Tell him.

Tell him what you said.

Drew, for one very teeny, tiny second,

I thought maybe Dory was referring

to paying off her student loans,

and Elliott's being a really big jerk about that.

Well...

Then why would we be meeting under a bridge?

Exactly! It's just a really big deal to pay off your student loans!

I don't want to talk about it anymore!

Oh, wait. Wait.

I think Dory's calling me from Gail's phone.

Don't! Why?

I'm scared. Ugh! Just answer it!

Yeah.

Hello? Gail: Drew? Drew?

Hi. It's Gail. It's Gail. Listen.

There is no right way to say this.

Dory has been arrested. Can you believe it?

She's making another phone call.

Look at her! She could care less!

I'm sorry?

Dory's been arrested?

Ask why. If you don't ask why, it'll be obvious we already know why.

Uh, o-oh, I mean, why on Earth would she be arrested?

I mean, my sweet, little Dory

can do no harm, and that's --

Why are you talking like that? I don't know.

They -- They say that she committed a murder!

I mean, can you believe that? Our Dory?

Uh, no. That is unbelievable.

I mean, w-who in the hell would she murder?!

She's so small!

You know what, Drew? I got to go.

I love you so, so much.

We're gonna get through this.

Um, yeah.

Gail, I'll -- man, I love you, too, so...

Love you so much. Okay, bye.

Okay. So, who told? Out with it.

What do you mean?

Obviously, one of us told the authorities, okay?

I don't want to waste one more second wondering who it was.

Who was it? Well, it wasn't me.

It wasn't me. Great. Then, it was Elliott.

How could it be me?! I brought it up!

Maybe it was Dory!

Maybe she turned herself in, you guys!

Oh, my God. Grow up. Why would she do that?

Because she's trying to save us and had a master plan!

Think about it! Oh, sweetie.

Yeah, I bet it was April.

If it was April, we'd all be arrested by now, Drew.

Yeah, well, maybe we're next, Elliott.

Stop scaring me, Drew!

Well, it is scary, Portia! Okay?!

This is the reality we live in! This is America now!

What do we do?!

There's nothing to do. Right?

Let's just...

Let's go home and act like we're innocent,

and we'll just pretend.

We'll pretend that we don't know why Dory's arrested,

and that will be that.

Yeah. Right?

Yeah. Yeah.

Okay, so we do nothing.

It's a pact.

Hands in.

No. Let's just go.

Yeah. Okay. Let's -- Yeah.

And please call me

if you get arrested or something, okay?

Drew, where are you going? Let's just all go home together.

Yeah, I don't -- I don't know w--