The Big Bang Theory

Previously on the big bang theory...

What's this? Oh, nothing,

just some math we don't need.

This is a different approach.

You trying to get the guidance system even smaller?

It's just a... theory.

Well, it's not even worked out.

Oh.

I want this.

Uh, but we've already met the agreed upon specs.

Going smaller would require

weeks' worth of new computations.

So get the kid with the two shirts to do it.

Sir, I mean, If I may,

uh, we've put a lot of thought and effort

into this current prototype.

It's a really elegant solution,

and most importantly, it works.

You both make excellent points.

And thank you for presenting it so articulately.

Make this.

Champagne,

champagne, thank you.

And for the world's tallest second grader, apple juice.

No bendy straw, some party.

Hey, a-a toast.

Thank you all for your support

while we worked on our air force project.

And please know that

we could not have done it without you,

so cheers.

All: Cheers.

You know, it's nice of you to acknowledge us,

but this is your accomplishment.

Yeah, you guys did this all on your own.

Without me.

To success without raj.

So what happens next?

Phase two,

we test it, perfect it,

and hope to live long enough to see the movie

based on our lives starring more attractive versions of us.

Yeah, I'll definitely live long enough...

Vitamin c.

First thing tomorrow morning, we're back at it.

Without me.

I hope his character doesn't make it into the movie;

He's kind of a bummer.

Female voice: Leonard hofstadter.

Access granted.

Hmm. I don't care if this thing's burning out my retinas;

It makes me feel special.

Now, before we field test, I think we...

What the hell?

Where is everything?

Who else has access to this room?

It's a secure lab in a classified facility;

Only the U.S. government and us.

This is very disconcerting.

But the movie did just get good.

Sir, I-i-I'm sorry but I just don't get it.

Y-you came into our lab

in the middle of the night and took our prototype

and all of our research and didn't even tell us?

Sounds like you get it.

Well, why would you do that?

You guys completed phase one, we'll take it from here.

Where did you move it?

I can't tell you that.

Are you implementing phase two?

I can't tell you that.

Wait, so you're just going to take all the work

we've done for the last year and toss us aside?

That one I can tell you, yes.

This is all very upsetting.

I'm sorry to hear that.

As you know,

the primary focus of the United States military

is people's feelings.

If that's sarcasm, please save it for our enemies.

Well, I may be moving out soon.

I think I found a place to live.

Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.

Really?

You kept sending me apartment listings.

Um... well, I...

Yeah, you got me.

Where are you moving?

And when? But a-also where?

Bert has a room for rent.

So you're gonna be roommates with Bert?

Uh, no, it's, uh, pretty private, actually,

it's over his garage.

So the only time I'll see him is when he pulls his car in,

does his laundry or practices drums in my dining room.

Well, good for you. Mm-hmm.

I actually have a little news myself.

Okay, we're just gonna circle back to when he's moving out?

I was, uh, asked to be a visiting researcher

at Princeton.

Hey, that's amazing. Good for you. Congratulations.

Thanks, but the thing is I'll be gone for a few months

and I don't know how Sheldon's gonna feel about that.

Oh, come on, he's a grown man, he can take care of himself.

You really believe that?

Once again, you got me.

How can you work on something for a year

and they just take it?

I can't believe the air force would treat us like that.

You know, I have a good mind to stop paying my taxes.

It's too bad I enjoy doing them so much.

The air force did it again.

They're erasing our lives!

Third floor, wrong apartment.

Although, if anyone's gonna clean out your apartment

and disappear, it'd be penny.

She might disappear,

but she's definitely not cleaning anything.

It's okay, everything's here.

Oh, hey, what's going on?

You won't believe it;

The military confiscated our project.

What? You're kidding.

Why would they do that?

They wouldn't say.

I feel so betrayed.

You know, all my life I thought uncle Sam was a friendly uncle

who brought you presents.

Turns out he's the other kind.

Sheldon, I'm so sorry.

Thank you. Can we just talk about something else?

Yeah, what's going on with you guys?

Give us some good news.

Amy's got some news.

Yeah, um...

Raj is moving out.

Oh, no.

When?

You doing okay?

Not really.

Want me to put on some Neil diamond?

That always makes you feel better.

No.

Then you'll get all sexed up and I'm not in the mood.

I mean, an entire year wasted.

You might be forgetting another accomplishment of the past year.

Oh. Yeah, yeah, we brought life into the world.

Really?

That's the importance you put on us having a baby?

I'm happy about it, but, I mean, it's not like I did much.

I mean, after the first three minutes

it was pretty much all you.

So, did you tell him about Princeton yet?

No, I'm waiting till he's in a good mood.

Oh, sweetie, you might not live that long.

I don't know, maybe I shouldn't go.

Oh, stop it, he'll be fine.

I guess. And he'll have you and Leonard right across the hall

the whole time.

Oh, damn, wait, you know, maybe you shouldn't go...

Got to go.

Morning.

I apologize for exceeding my allotted bathroom time.

Are you feeling okay?

Not really.

Apparently grief can make one less regular.

Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.

No, I sat and I sat, but to no avail.

Oh, the-the more details, the more sorry.

Well, maybe this'll cheer you up.

I made your favorite oatmeal...

Plain.

What's the occasion?

No occasion, I just wanted to do something nice for you.

You're so kind.

You know, I don't know how I ever got by without you.

Oh.

That's sweet, but you... You did just fine on your own.

Well, I thought that, too,

but I've come to realize, I am completely dependent on you.

Sheldon, you're, you're being silly.

No, to wake up every morning and know you're there

is a great comfort to me.

Mmm, tasteless.

How do you do it?

You know, what you need to do is

put this air force project behind you

and just dive into something new.

Well, there is our quantum cognition experiment.

You and I could spend more time on that.

Oh, I don't know,

I mean, let's say we succeed in proving

that our consciousness creates reality.

I mean, what will we have really accomplished?

You know, a loaf of bread's still three bucks.

I'm confused.

You're always saying that you want to spend more time with me.

That is true, I have said that.

Well, a lot, it's very annoying.

Has something changed?