Beavis and Butt-head (Beavis and Butt-Head)

People, I'm very disappointed with these test scores.

Weet scored.

No, but head.

That's my point.

You didn't score.

You got a zero.

Now, I know you people are bright enough.

So I'm guessing the problem lies elsewhere.

So today, I want to show you how to realign your mind-body energies through simple

meditation.

First, I'll assume the lotus position.

There.

Now, now, now, my neck.

Oh my god, somebody call it ambulance.

I thought school was going to fuck today.

Yeah.

All right.

All right.

That was kind of cool.

I guess so.

Yeah, you know, it's kind of, kind of groovy.

Kind of have a nice little thing, you know.

It kind of makes me feel good.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yes, oh yeah.

Yeah, I see what you're saying.

It's kind of hate.

Yeah, it is really cool.

Yeah.

Me, but I was just kidding.

Come ask me.

I know.

Shut up, but you really like this crap.

I don't, but I don't just kidding.

What a...

Stop it.

I hate everything about him.

I hate that.

I hate it.

Shut up.

You know what would be cool?

And if it just started pouring rain right now.

Yeah.

Or maybe there'd be like a sudden hail storm.

Yeah, yeah.

Turd storm.

He doesn't know such thing as a turd storm, Beavoth.

This is a video, but I can have anything they want me.

And I want to see a turd storm.

Let him down, Beavoth.

And I thought I told you to quit talking about turds all the time.

Oh, yeah, I'm sorry.

Cool.

I win again.

Paper kills scissors.

Ow!

Boy, you're pretty good at this game.

Good morning, everybody.

I'm Jim the substitute.

Sorry to rush you, but we're going to be dead in 80 years,

and that's barely enough time to learn anything.

Let's start with these things.

A textbook gives you a hernia, not an education.

Whoa.

Cool.

Yeah.

Lesson one people enthusiasm.

If you can't get into what you're doing, why do it all?

What's your name?

Joe?

Joe?

Joe what?

Mama?

Joe mama.

That's great.

Lesson two.

Be creative.

What's your name?

Um, um, Jack.

Okay, Jack. Jack what?

I'm Jack mama.

Alright, fair enough.

I don't know a point of trying.

How about you?

You, gee, Rexion.

That's marvelous.

You?

Agini.

Miss Agini.

Miss Agini.

Hey, that's wonderful.

I like this class.

This guy's a dumbass.

He'll believe anything.

Yeah, really.

I'm gonna stick around for this.

Check it out, butthead.

Somebody left their locker open.

Let's close it for him.

Let's close it again.

Yeah.

A good reader's like a lover.

Attentive, passionate.

Who wants to make love today?

Hey, beaverson butthead.

What do you think of those old Superman comics, I alone you?

Uh, we gave him to the kid after he showed us a dead deer.

Yeah, he'll have all bloated and stuffed me.

I poked it.

Why, choice, men.

Life experience beats book learning hands down.