Drawn Together

Wooldoor: who's it gonna be?! Who's it gonna be?!

Wheeeeee!

Wooldoor: the producers decided to surprise one of us

With a visit from a family member.

I hope it's someone from my family

Like flagfred cheesewheel,

Lintsue brickshade, or prom-queen dumpsterbaby.

Look, everyone! Someone's coming!

Clara: the second I saw the horse and carriage,

I just knew it had to be someone from my kingdom.

But when I saw it was the short carriage, my heart sank.

Why?! Why did she have to come?!

Oh, fuck me.

Um, everyone, this is my special cousin bleh.

Foxxy: no one knew clara

Had a mentally-challenged cousin, but it was cool.

The foxxy five used to perform for special needs kids,

And those people got hearts as big as they oversized foreheads.

"I am sam is a well-written and exceptionally well-acted tearjerker,"

Raves adam nayman of eye weekly.

What the shoebazzle was that?

She, um, only quotes reviews from the movie I am sam.

Huh? Hmm.

Well, this has been fun. Bye!

Well, i've never seen someone that slow go that fast.

Oh, yeah! Give it up!

Yeah!

Oh, poor ling-ling. He's so disappointed his father didn't show.

Oh!

Oh, sweetie, i'm so sorry your father's not coming.

We still love ya! Don't we, toot?!

Fine!

Ling-ling, you taste so weird.

Let's go, bleh. The coast is clear.

But after this, no more potty breaks.

"I am sam plays like a made-for-tv weep--"

Shh!

I know it seemed like I was ashamed of my cousin,

But nothing could be further from the truth.

Aah! Foxxy: hey, clara!

What's up, girlfriend?

You know, none of us have really had a chance

To hang out with bleh yet.

Bleh? What's a bleh?

Is that one of your jive words like "emancipation"?

No, bleh your cousin.

Uh, clara? Why is the lamp drooling?

I guess to remind us to conserve electricity.

Clara, there is no reason to be embarrassed by your cousin.

Embarrassed? I'm not embarrassed.

Stop pretending bleh is a lamp.

She is not a lamp, clara.

She is a real person with real feelings.

Foxxy was probably right.

Damn that ms. Know-it-all!

I should have killed her when I had the chance.

Give me your hand!

First, give me the ring!

Xandir: it just didn't make sense.

When we licked ling-ling last time,

We got all ed up.

But this time, nothing happened.

Well, we got a little aroused,

But not ed up.

Uhh! What's the deal-e-o?

I don't feel anything. You?

Nothing.

Hmm. Maybe we have to eat ling-ling.

Why is it when something doesn't work,

Your first reaction is to eat it?

What?! What are you doing?

I couldn't find the remote.

You know, there is one person

Who can figure this out.

The professor! The professor!

Ooh!

Aha!

Got it. Hit the lights.

Here you see the african camel toad.

It secretes a hallucinogen

Whenever it's scared.

Ahh!

Yeah, that's--oh, I didn't know that.

When "cool" kids feel like catching a "buzz,"

They scare the amphibian and then lick its skin.

All the cool kids, you say?

Now take ling-ling, the asian trading card battle monster.

It creates a similar hallucinogen

Whenever it's disappointed.

Ahh! Oh, I want to be cool!

So, ling-ling was experiencing disappointment

Due to its father's absence,

Then, upon kissing ling-ling,

You became...[wacky noises] technically speaking.

So, only when ling-ling is disappointed, eh? Hmm.

Oh! Don't look, but corky at 3:00.

Foxxy: it looked like I got through to the princess.

Clara would see that there ain't no reason to be ashamed of bleh.

We all adults.

Dude, let's egg the trainable.

Mind if we join you guys?

No, no, no. Of course not.

Don't be stupid.

Man, clara's cousin is so hot!

Damn! She's like retarded hot!

sam! Aah!

Clara: i'm really glad I brought bleh

Down to hang out with everyone.

They treated her like she was one of the gang.

I hadn't seen bleh have this much fun

Since they cancelled the pretty, shiny object show.

You sure you don't want to stay and play a few rounds?

Nah, it's getting late, and we don't want to intrude on guy time.

'night!

"I am sam works magic 'cause of penn,"

Raves lou lumenick of the new york post.

I go first. Whee!

Holy shit!

She is so hot!

Oh, spanky.

What? Oh. Ok.

Oh, that bleh, man.

I would totally dip my wick in that.

Listen, dude. No matter how hot she is,

You would not punch holes in a sped.

Oh, hell, yeah, I would.

I mean, she's the perfect girl.

All the sweater meat of a regular chick

And half the pillow talk.

Man, you're all talk.

Look, I got 20 large that says you won't sleep with her.

Make it 50 and you're on.

Oh, ha ha! Wheeeeeee!

Hey, if you're gonna be gay about this, you can't play.

Sorry.

Fine. 50 bucks says you won't have sex with bleh.

Easy money.

Captain hero is gonna show you guys

What being a real man is all about.

All: triple kiss!

¶ ling-ling into battle go ¶

¶ fulfill destiny of the soul ¶

¶ all the children sing ¶

Kids: ¶ kill, kill, kill, kill, die, die, die ¶

¶ kill, kill, kill, kill... ¶

Wait, ling-ling. It's just us.

We're not really a 3-headed, acid-spitting needle monster.

Oh.

Oh, no, ling-ling.

Instead of cheering you up,

We accidentally disappointed you.

Oh, poor baby.

Triple kiss!

Oh! Hee hee!

Clara: I found it a bit odd

That captain hero wanted to take bleh out on a date,

And it was my responsibility

To make sure his intentions were pure.

So, captain hero, is it?

Oh. Heh heh! Yeah?

Coming to take my little bleh out

For a night on the town, eh?

You know, I don't know what'd I do

If anything happened to my little bleh.

Yes, ma'am. I mean, no, ma'am.

Son, do you know what it's like

To kill a man with your bare hands?

I do.

I...

Oh!

Here's bleh now!

¶ there she is... ¶

Wow! You look... Stunning.

"I am sam's dakota fanning is worth the price of admission."

Ow! What the hell?!

A little added protection.

You'll get the antidote when I get my bleh back.

Hey, ling-ling, you excited for christmas?

Too bad there's no such thing as santa claus!

I bet you're disappointed.

Oh.

Hey, look what I found in your ear!

Is it a quarter?

Oh, no! It's a tumor!

Oh.