Wizards of Waverly Place

Dad.

Since it looks like I'm gonna be the family wizard anyway,

can I just take out the garbage using magic?

Come on, for practice.

Magic to do your chores?

Are you new here?

Theresa, come on.

A little practice can't hurt.

Mom, you can't resist the pout.

Fine.

Garbage man, dumpster land, givin' a hand to the trash can.

Ladies and gentlemen, the future family wizard.

What a nightmare.

Keep the clapping going,

because I have a very big announcement.

I have decided to quit the wizard competition.

Ladies and gentlemen, the Russo family quitter.

We are an impressive bunch.

Alex, why would you want to give up magic?

Well, I figure I'm so far behind, I won't even qualify.

This way, I can put all of my focus

into my relationship with Mason.

And I intend to focus on our relationship

by giving up many of my canine urges.

Like rolling around in this delightful trash.

All right.

Go ahead and knock yourself out.

She declares her love for her werewolf

by sacrificing her powers.

Harper, what are you doing?

I'm writing a romance novel.

It's all about this teenage witch in New York City

who falls desperately in love with a werewolf.

Witch and a werewolf... I'm not a witch.

It's not all about you, Alex.

Well, then, what's that witch's name?

Al...

Hi. We're looking for Max Russo.

If he did something good, it probably wasn't him.

If he did something bad, we're broke.

Where is he, Daddy? If I don't meet him,

I'm going to throw away all of my stuff,

and make you buy it all again.

Not again, princess. Please, tell me he's here.

Hi. I'm Julie Cucuy.

- Cucuy? - This is my husband, Carlos,

and our daughter Lisa.

Lisa saw Max on this month's cover of Future Wizards.

Wait, wait, your last name is Cucuy?

That's funny because that's also the name

of these scary Latino mythical creatures

that my mom used to talk to me about

to make me behave as a child.

That's us. Boo.

We're real Cucuys.

We live here in the real world just like you wizards do.

Excuse us.

Theresa, I've heard about these Cucuys.

They are filthy rich.

And it's always been my lifelong dream

to hang out with the filthy rich.

I thought your lifelong dream

was to have a vending machine couch.

The filthy rich would have that.

Wait, if you guys are real Cucuys,

how come you're not as scary as I remember you to be?

In the summer of '79, I put you to bed every night

with my scary face under my skin.

Boo!

Cucuys!

I promise I'll behave, Mama! I'm sorry!

What's she saying?

It sounded like she was ordering a number four from Fiesta Express.

There he is.

Max Russo, the future wizard.

Future wizard?!

What?

Oh, that's me.

You didn't even win the competition!

That's it. I'm doing whatever it takes to get back into this thing.

But first, I'm gonna draw a silly mustache

and maybe a unibrow to express my discontent.

Hi, Max.

Hmmm. You're even cuter in person.

Yeah, we should date so I can tell you what to wear.

Well, can you start by telling me to wear a Viking helmet?

Everything goes with one of those.

I don't think so.

- Then I'm out. - He's not out, he's not out!

You just made a big mistake.

That was awesome. You should have opened with that.

I'm Max Russo. Hi.

Credit Union of Wiz World,

John Doe Wiz World City Prosecutor,

Ah, Wizard Family Competition Commissioner's Office. 15C.

Welcome to the Wizard Family Competition Commissioner's Office.

Can I help you?

Uh, yes. Hello there, Helen.

I'm Justin Russo.

- Justin Russo. - Mm-hmm.

Oh, yeah, here you are.

Wait, you're the kid who exposed wizardry?

Might have slipped out.

You have got some nerve walking around here.

I was wondering if there was anything you can think of

to, uh... get me back into the running.

Helen.

Well...

All right, we do offer a community service program

that might help you gain a level.

Let's see what current jobs are available.

OK. Centaur stable cleaner.

Wizard grave digger.

Really?

Or tutoring a class of delinquent WizTech students.

Any of those suit your fancy?

Tutoring suits my fancy. Yes, tutoring.

I was born to shape young wizards' minds.

- Really? - Yeah!

- That's so noble of you. - They call me Noble Justin.

Well...

All right, then. They will be at your lair tomorrow.

Good luck.

Excellent. Thank you.

And, uh... It was good seeing you, Helen.

You got the gig, kid. Give it a rest.

Do it again.

Do it again, do it again.

I've already shown you 18 times.

It's getting annoying.

He was annoying to me, too, at first.

But he'll grow on you.

There's my little princess.

With her prince.

The Cucuys! How are ya? Hi!

They are really hitting it off.

You might want to put on sunglasses,

'cause the sparks, they are a-flying.

Good, because we wanted to invite Max

to our yacht for a dinner party.

Do you think he would enjoy that?

Max would be up for anything.

Um, but he doesn't go anywhere without his family.

I mean, he doesn't do anything without us.

Especially yachting.

Terrific. You're all invited to our yacht on the Hudson.

Yacht on the Hudson? Yacht on the Hudson?

Max! We're going yachting on the Hudson!

Yachting on the Hudson. Yachting on the Hudson.

Thank you so much.

We would love to attend.

Uh... could you pop us some more popcorn, love?

Plain or caramel?

Oh, that. It was a gem.

Let's embellish it a little bit. All right.

Um, how about you say,

"Albert, I would hike through plains

and swim through an ocean of caramel to be..."

Hey, kids!

Oh, Chancellor Tootietootie.

Just popping in when there might be someone around

who shouldn't know about magic.

Just what I was afraid of.

You guys are still together.

Of course we're together.

That's what you do when you're dating.

When you're married is when you do things separately.

Well, I heard you dropped out of the wizards' competition.

If you're going to be a mortal, you should know

that the Wizard Love and Romance Council

strictly prohibits werewolves and non-wizards from being together.

What? Why?

The werewolf always ends up eating the human.

You know that. Werewolves can't control their anger.

It's just a fact of life.

But we were gonna be together forever and ever.

So long that I said "ever" twice.

I would never eat my little meatball.

See, he's already looking at you as food.

You guys are through. It's the rules.

Sorry, but it's time to board the train to Splitsville.

Choo, choo!

We can't... We can't be together?

Then that means...

We have to break up.

That's not Splitsville!

I can't be without you.

I can't be without you either.

After all that we've been through, it just can't end like this.

This is awkward.

I always wait too long before I flash out.

You keep going here and I'll just leave. OK?

No, no, no, no, no. Wait.

It's actually good that you're still here.

Who do we have to talk to at the Love and Romance Council

to see about getting this rule appealed?

That would be me. I'm the chairperson of the Love and Romance Council.

And now it's going to be even more awkward

when I inform you that your appeal is denied.