A Slight Case of Murder

Here's to the end of Prohibition!

Old Man Prohibition passed away...

at exactly 5:32 and a half p.m., New York time, when Utah ratified ...

Folks, here's the last keg of Prohibition beer in the house.

Marco's ether and it's on the house!

Here's to Remy Marco, the king of beer.

And he kept us supplied for four years!

Marco is all right!

Yeah, but thank Heaven we don't have to drink his beer anymore.

To Remy Marco! To Remy Marco!

All right, shut up. Shut up, you lugs. I've got something to say.

Prohibition is over, sure.

What of it? Well, I'll show you what of it.

It's the birth of a new day for us.

Come here, all of you. I'll show you something.

Get over here.

Look. Get an eyeful of that.

I tell you, it's great. A land office business. Everybody's drinking beer.

- Don't that mean anything to you? - Yeah, but Remy...

Well, they've been drinking my beer for four years, ain't they? And liked it.

They had to like it.

Well, they're gonna keep on drinking it, more than ever now.

It's gonna be the same beer, the same customers.

They're gonna be just as thirsty as they ever was.

The only difference is, from now on, Marco is legitimate.

- What's gonna happen to us? - What about us?

Oh, shut up, will you? Shut up, you lugs.

I'm gonna take care of every one of you, just like I always did.

- I got a job for every one of you. - Yeah?

From now on, you're gonna be salesmen.

- Salesmen? - What kind of salesmen?

Yeah, that's what I said, salesmen.

Well, that's what you've been up to now, ain't it? Beer salesmen.

Well, that's what you're gonna keep on being.

Only there's gonna be a little difference in our sales business.

Come on, boys. Take out the artillery.

Come on. Hurry up. Hurry up, now. Loosen up.

I'll be lost without this.

That's it.

Hey, some of you guys over there, bring up the rest of those persuaders.

Come on, now. Make it snappy. There, that's it.

Lefty, Blacky, I want you to dump this on one of our trucks...

and cart it down to the East River.

You mean dump it, boss?

Hey, we can get a lot of money for this stuff, boss. We can sell it.

Not us. Now, I told you, from now on, we're legitimate.

There's gonna be a lot of changes around here.

In the first place, this ain't no still no more, see.

It's a brewery.

Yeah, it's a business enterprise operated on a strictly legitimate basis.

Get me?

Oh, yeah, and I'm gonna give this place a lot of class.

Now, that reminds me.

Mike, I want you to shave every day.

Every day?

- Lefty, lay off these striped silk shirts. - Oh, boss...

From now on, everybody wears white shirts. Get me?

With clean collars.

Listen, boss.

Will it help us to sell Marco's Beer any better with clean shirts?

Oh, yes. Say, there's another thing.

From now on, it ain't Marco's Beer no more.

Come here. I'll show you something ...

Say, you know, Marco ain't been asleep.

You know, I'm all ready for this new setup.

Come here. Get a gander at this.

Tomorrow, the warehouse sign comes down, and up goes this one.

That sign? That ain't big enough.

Oh, you dope. Ain't you got no imagination?

This is just a miniature model just to give you an idea.

Well, I'm going home.

- Here you are, boss. - Thanks.

"Drink Gold Velvet Beer. It's the tops."

It's a good thing the boss never drinks beer.

I want everybody to show up bright and early tomorrow morning...

ready for business.

Oh, and Butch, wash your neck.

Come on, Mike. And get a manicure.

Come on.

What's Remy gonna do now, Nora?

I don't know. He never tells me till he's done it.

Everything was going swell under Prohibition.

Then the government has to step in with repeal.

Yeah, they're always passing laws interfering with people.

- Hello, Remy. - How are you? Hi, how are you?

Hiya, Joe.

Well, Nora, I want to talk to you. Excuse us, folks.

Go right ahead.

Oh, you look great, kid.

Come right in, honey. Into the music room.

Music room? Up to now, this has always been a slot machine room.

Well, that's all gonna be changed from now.

We're gonna start putting on plenty of class.

Oh, and, by the way, have Mike take the spittoons out of the living room.

Remy, you aren't thinking of going into some other racket, are you?

No, we're going legitimate. Take a look at me.

You are now looking at the president of Gold Velvet Brewery.

"Drink Gold Velvet Beer. It's the tops."

It all sounds swell, Remy.

If I could only be sure you ain't got a bug in your nut.

Well, listen, doll, I got the whole thing figured out.

I've been telling the boys about it, too.

Why, I've been making plans for all this.

But what about Mary? Will we keep her in that Paris school?

Why not? It's the most expensive school in Europe, ain't it?

Well, that's what I mean.

Will we be able to afford it after we're legitimate?

Afford it?

Now, look here, Nora. Nothing's too good for Marco's daughter.

I'm telling you...

I'm gonna have the biggest beer business in the country.

In the world!

Now that it's legal to sell it, and you don't have to push it...

you just watch Marco sail ahead.

Imagine, us being legitimate after all these years.

Gee, I won't hardly know how to act.

Well, after we're legit a little while...

you'll get so used to it, you'll forget we ever were anything else.

Well, that being the case, we gotta start changing things around here...

right away.

Gentlemen, I beg your pardon. Please refrain from any rough talk.

What kind of a joint do you think you're in?

What do you mean?

Remy's going legit, see.

- What? - Yeah, that's right.

From now on, Nora wants you to be high tone and talk refined.

Attaboy, Remy.

Yeah, put a muzzle on that "attaboy" lingo.

That goes for all of you.

What will it be? Schindlers, Budweiser, or Gold Velvet?

Anything but Gold Velvet.

I'm sorry. We are not renewing our order on Gold Velvet Beer.

This joint used to take care of two dozen barrels...

of Marco's stuff a week in the old days.

Those days are over. They want real beer now.

- What was in that glass? - Gold Velvet Beer.

Take it away. I'm not having a tooth pulled.

- Remy? - Yeah?

We got another letter this morning from Mary's school.

Yeah?

We're six months behind on her bills. They want $4,850.

Well, they got a lot of nerve bothering Marco...

about chicken feed like that.

Nora, I ain't got it.

They gotta wait.

Remy, I knew things were pretty bad, but I didn't think they were that bad.

I'm in pretty deep.

Four years legit, and I'm worse off than when I started.

You'll pull out of it. You've done it before.

But in the meantime, we gotta start cutting down on expenses.

First of all, Mary's gotta come home.

Gee, I hate to do that.

You know, I want her to get a load of all that swell education they got over there.

But how can we do that? You say she's in hock for 4,850 smackers.

Well, we gotta sell some stuff. That's all.

Look, why don't you call her up right now? Start economizing this very minute.

Oh, gee, I hate to do that.

I guess you're right, Mama.

Gee, I ...

Hello, long distance? Get me Paris.

What?

Sure. Paris, France.

Wait here, driver.

When the bank takes this brewery over, we ought to keep that slogan.

It's good. Different.

Yeah, nothing wrong with the slogan.

Nothing wrong with the brewery.

Perfectly equipped, well located, it's got everything.

Ought to be a gold mine...

once we get hold of it and change the beer.

Too bad Marco couldn't find that out for himself, isn't it?

It's a shame.

Morning, Miss Ferguson. Mr. Marco in?

Yes, he is, Mr. Post...

but I'm afraid he's going to be engaged for quite some time.

His daughter just arrived from abroad this morning.

- Shall we wait? - We'll wait.

Well, well, well.

You're looking swell, kid.

You know, you look even prettier than your mother did at your age.

And that's going some.

Remember, I used to be willing to bet a million dollars...

that you were the best-looking dame in the whole burg?

And I got no takers, either. Remember that?

Nobody disagreed with your father in those days.

Well, you're looking pretty well yourself, Remy.

I feel great.

- And my! What a success you've become. - Yeah.

Oh, golly, I'm proud of you.

Well, you've got a right to be.

You just ask anybody who Marco is.

Why, pretty soon, I'll be selling enough Gold Velvet Beer...

to float Manhattan Island on.

Why, only the other day, someone told me...

anybody who takes one drink of your father's beer stops right there.

Now, there you are. What'd I tell you?

Sorry to interrupt, Mr. Marco...

but Mr. Post and Mr. Ritter are here to see you.

It's very urgent. They can't wait very much longer.

Well, tell those bloodsuckers I'll be right out.