Wizards of Waverly Place

Where is Max?

I want to start the meeting.

My money's on "stuck in a well."

Why would Max be stuck in a well?

Because I put a well in his room.

Guys, so sorry I'm late.

I got stuck in a well.

And thank you to Alex, I don't have to leave my room

to get a drink of water anymore.

Alex, go up to your brother's room and get rid of that well.

But save the water, 'cause we need to make ice cubes.

OK. I'll save the wood, too, so you can turn it into pulp and make napkins.

Hey... that is a great idea.

You get on that!

OK, tomorrow is your mother's birthday.

Oh, do you guys give her magical gifts?

You know Mom and magic. Not a fan.

Great. I can give her my "I hate magic" t-shirt.

Yeah, she'd probably like that.

There's this whole shelf of magical gifts

Uncle Kelbo gave her and she never even opened 'em.

Let me guess, Alex opened them?

Kuh-ah-ah!

Alex does not know about this shelf.

She thinks they're educational toys.

And you are not gonna be the one to tell her about it.

Don't worry. I won't say anything.

Look, we don't have to worry about Kelbo's gift this year,

because he's not coming to dinner.

Uncle Kelbo's not coming to dinner?

That's my gift to Mom. I call it.

Hey, Mom, here's a little pre-birthday present.

Uncle Kelbo's not coming to your birthday dinner.

Pretty good, huh? It's just gonna be the six of us.

That's great, honey. It'll be just like every other dinner, right?

Do I get to cook it, too?

No, it's your birthday. It should be special.

Why don't we invite over all of your cousins?

They live so close but we never get to see them.

No, no, no. No one from my side of the family is visiting.

Can we at least invite Uncle Ernesto?

Yeah, come on. He always has awesome stories about his travels all over the world.

His stories aren't that great.

I've got stories from my travels.

Remember the time I almost hit the rat on the Brooklyn Bridge?

I was like... whoa!

I'll never forget that time Uncle Ernesto took me to that Mets game.

He caught a foul ball and gave it to me.

That was like, ten years ago.

How about you get another story about some grown-up that likes you.

Ten years, Theresa.

I think they're old enough to understand now.

Yeah, Mom, come on. What is it?

Are you embarrassed of us?

If anyone needs me, I'll be upstairs spearing things.

No, honey, I've numbed out "embarrassed" long, long ago.

Then what is it, Mom? We used to have so much fun

with Uncle Ernesto.

Yeah. That was before your powers came in.

Remember the next time he took you to a Mets game?

You guys used magic to make every foul ball come straight to you.

- Oh, yeah. - After that, I can't risk him finding out about magic.

Well... So, what, you're just gonna ignore your brother forever?

That actually sounds like a good idea.

I've thought about having Ernesto over so many times

but you guys are way too careless with wizardry.

Well...

What if we promised that if Uncle Ernesto came over,

it would be a magic-free evening?

I would love to have Ernesto over,

but you guys can't go ten minutes without using magic.

Mom, I've been holding back using magic all day.

You don't think I want to turn Justin's ugly shirt into something uglier?

You don't think I want to put a zipper on Alex's face?

- If you promise... - We promise.

- Promise. - Promise, promise.

Then I guess we can have Ernesto over.

Yay for family.

Oh, Harper, you don't have to go to such extremes for my birthday cake.

I'd be just as happy with a candle in a cupcake.

Well, let her make the cake, honey.

Ooh, that would be good.

Harper, can you make a honey cake?

I can put in whatever you want.

Making a birthday cake from scratch is a Finkle family tradition.

All right. Wands are in the Lair.

The well is gone. We are in a magic-free zone.

- Happy birthday, Mom. - Thank you, mija.

This is gonna be the best birthday ever.

Oh, I hope I didn't just jinx it.

Oh, that's Uncle Ernesto.

OK, whatever you guys do, do not use magic.

Yes, Justin, why don't you say it louder?

- Hey! - Hey!

How you doing? Nice to see you. What's up, man?

- Hey, Theresa! - Ernesto!

- Oh, you look great. - I know!

And you still look like you're 27 years old.

I know!

You haven't changed, have you?

Has she told you how wildly popular she was in high school?

Today? Not yet.

Well, I was wildly popular, too.

But am I the only one here? Where's the rest of the family?

Oh, well, I got so excited when I invited you and you said you'd come

that I forgot to invite anybody else.

- Jerry? - Um...

Long time, no see, Ernesto. How've you been?

Oh, terrific. I've been terrific, actually.

I just came back from a trip down to Mexico,

and while I was there, I helped rescue the President of Mexico's cat.

So... they gave me the key to the country!

Wow!

Now we can get into Mexico,

even after it's closed, and on the weekends.

All right. I was just kidding about the key.

But I did save the President of Mexico's cat, and in return, he gave me a job.

Head of security. For the cat.

Oh, so that would make you a catsitter?

Alex...

You look wonderful.

You look like a grown up young lady.

Aw. See, everybody?

It's possible to say that without being sarcastic.

And, Justin! Look at you, man.

Pretty soon, you're gonna be taller than me.

I already am taller than you, Uncle Ernesto.

Well, if your mother's 27, then I'm taller than you.

Now, I know it's your mother's birthday

but I still got you guys a little something-something.

Aw, thank you. That's so sweet of you.

Hi. Hello. I'm Harper.

I live with the Russos. Where's my little something-something?

Oh... Harper, nice to meet you.

I'm sorry. If I knew you were here, I would've brought you chocolate fudge or something.

Oh. No worries.

Being forgotten is like an old, comfortable pair of shoes.

Well, how about a giant novelty key that I bought in Times Square?

Ah! This is fine for now, but now that you know I exist,

I expect something better next time.

OK. Why don't we all just sit down, relax,

and Alex and Justin can open up their gifts.

You guys are gonna love it.

It is a classic Latin American game called Balero.

Ah. And if I'm not mistaken, Balero is Spanish

for "something really cool and expensive."

And I'm mistaken.

And for Theresa, I got our home movies transferred to a DVD...

- ...and our most precious memories in a scrapbook.

Oh, Ernesto. It's wonderful.

Hey...

- Uncle Ernesto! - Max.

Hey, I got you a gift.

It's those shoes you wanted when you were little,

the ones with the springs on the bottom.

Remember how you said you wanted to jump to the moon?

Wow, thank you.

But, I don't really need those. I've been to Mars.

- To Mars? - Uh...

What he means to say is he's been to a Mars-themed restaurant in mid-town.

Yep. It's called T.J.I., you know... Mars.

Yeah, you're right. I'm sorry. I was just distracted by this gift

that came for Mom from Uncle Kelbo.

- Open it, Mom. - Max, why don't you get that out of here?

All right. I'll take it down to the Lair.

Um... Lair?

Uh... He means fort. We have a fort.

We built a fort.

Can someone go down and make sure that Kelbo's gift

- gets into the fort? - I'll go.

- I meant you. - Yeah, you got it.

I'm just gonna go to the fort.

A fort sounds like fun, man.

I built a fort once in the woods.

Yeah, it was so amazing that the park rangers turned it into a gift shop

where they sold mini versions of that fort.

Well, I've slept outside on our terrace.

In the rain.

Why would you do that?

In case I ran into someone with a story like that, so I could top it.

Topped.

All right, well, let's go check out this fort.

No, no! We can't, because we have to...

...move the furniture like Theresa's always wanted.

- Happy birthday, honey. - Oh, thank you! It's what I've always wanted.

Uh... Ernesto, could you give me a hand?

Yes, I can give you a hand.

Yeah, Jerry! Go, do it!

You can move it!

Just kidding. Topped.

Max! Max, we are trying to give Mom a magic-free birthday.

Don't bring any of Uncle Kelbo's crazy magic gift upstairs.

Fine, I'll put it on the shelf with the others.

Others?

Did you just say that shelf is full of crazy magic gifts?

Um, no. You said crazy magic gifts. I just said shelf.

I can't believe it. I never touched those!

Dad told me those were educational toys. Max...