Lazor Wulf

Look at you.

Looking all good up there.

That's right, baby. Everybody's got that inner glow.

But hey, I have a bootleg copy of the 1985

Berry Gordy-produced "The Last Dragon" on LaserDisc.

Hey, Canon Wulf, it's your move.

It's Blazor Wulf.

- What's up, sis? - Where are you guys?

Currently, we're howling at The Moon.

- Whassup? - Oh, God.

Let me talk to Canon real quick.

This what you're doing right now?

Tomorrow is my annual weave blowout sale,

and you both agreed to helping me set up.

I got Jermajesty Jackson coming through,

and let's be clear ... he ain't cheap.

Oh, damn, I guess I forgot.

But can you blame me?

Who can think of weaves when The Moon's out tonight

and looking so damn fine?

I just gotta show my appreciation!

Moon looking fine?

What the hell are you talking about?

I'm tryin' to do it big and you're busy howling

at a goddamn moon?

- You're a piece of . - Whatever.

We'll get there when we get there. Bye.

Seemed like that could've been something important.

Homegirl's gotta just understand that we busy right now.

Not everything runs on Blazor Wulf time.

You, put that there!

And, uh, would you hang that sign on the left?

Kimmy, did you get my hot wings?

Also, could someone check on Jermajesty, please?

Should've been here by now

Hold up, did you just say

the Jermajesty Jackson is gonna be here?

Yes, Jermajesty,

the dopest lip-syncher in the mother galaxy.

And I paid a ton of money for him to be here.

Screw these hair dryers, I'm about to rob me a Jackson!

Ha ha! Gimme that!

The hell is your father, your dad, whatever you call him?

Who the cares?!

You know what? Whatever.

Damn, you looking thick as heck!

Thick as heck, I say!

It stars Taimak, Vanity, and Julius Carry as Sho'nuff.

It's a classic film. You'll love it, I promise.

Homey's name is Taimak?

- That's sick. - Ain't it, though?

I'ma probably change my name to Taimak.

Important question.

You ever seen a nice-ass moon

and just... wanted to pee on it?

Nah, can't really say that that's ever crossed my mind.

Could you two quit it?

'Cause that would be greatly appreciated on my end.

Oh, . Did you hear that?

- Me thinks it's trying to say something? - I don't know.

Sounds like a bunch of weird noises to me.

Maybe it's complimenting our mustaches.

Listen, I'm just trying to do my 12 hours and dip, okay?

I'm not here to get hollered at and/or peed on.

Yo! What is you saying, Ma?

I'm saying, "Go away and leave me alone!"

Are you getting this?

I'm, like, completely lost here.

I don't know, I might hear a hint of Norwegian?

Maybe it's showing appreciation

for all the compliments we're giving it.

Probably not, but let's roll with it anyway.

Y'all really workin' my last nerve.

Whoa.

Yo, the homeys definitely need to see this.

Damn,

this fool's supposed to be here an hour ago.

Let me see what's up.

Hi, it's me ... Jermajesty.

I'm in the uGoGo, way to Blazor Wulf's Weave Blow Out.

Wait a minute. What is that?!

Poor person, stop the car.

Now, wait a minute.

It's bananas over here.

It's some wolves howling and what not.

Seems like a party!

Yooooo! It's Jermajesty!

Come through!

So, like, you know, I had somewhere

I was "paid" to be, but whatever to that ,

'cause I'm allowed to ignore my responsibilities

because I'm famous.

I just made some new friends.

Say hi to Lazor Wulf and Canon Wulf.

Those mother .

Blazor Wulf! The world would love to know,

on a scale of 1 to 10, how mad are you right now?

I'd be at like a 20 if I were you.

But that's just me.

4,579, Jamantha.

I'm at a 4,579.

Girl, I know that's right. Let's keep watching.

You got this, Jermajesty. Just believe in yourself.

I mean, but I ain't never ... Just do it, already!

God damn!

I'm now at a full 4,580, Jamantha, and

I think I'm gonna go Jermajesty Jackson up.

There you have it ... Blazor Wulf is going to

Jermajesty Jackson up. Back to you.

You guys don't seem to heed warnings.

Hey, guys. That's no way to talk to a moon.

Well, you can go if you don't like it.

Actually, it might be best if you leave.

Well, I'm just saying, it seems a little grotesque,

out of control, kind of inconsiderate to The Moon.

I don't know, I just ... Oh, my God!

Is that Jermajesty Jackson?!

Oh! Oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God!

Lazor, Canon!

Bye-bye.

Yeah, you better run. Lazor Wulf?

- Hey, Blazor, h-how's it goin'? - It's not going anywhere.

- Where is Jermajesty? - I don't know.

But I bet you ain't know that Berry Gordy

- produced "The Last Dragon." - Oh, my God.

She ain't know.

What's good, Blazor?