Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce

Previously on "Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce"...

We had a talk about seeing other people.

People should really get to know each other

before you define who you are in a relationship.

Kind of forgot I'm living with the expert.

Albert's wife had us followed.

She has pictures of us in a hotel,

and if Gordon finds out, my life is over.

I was diagnosed at 11.

Social anxiety disorder.

Doesn't that just mean you're shy?

Debilitatingly shy.

Who's gonna know?

I let somebody hurt me.

This psycho could have killed me.

What kind of mother does that?

This is Phoebe, my ex-wife.

Correspondents' Dinner is a big deal.

It's political nerd prom.

He didn't tell you he was going?

He did tease me about needing a date.

Maybe he didn't have a plus-one.

I can get out there and do what's good for the gander.

Meaning get laid.

I need a real man.

_

So I read your working draft.

Yeah, I thought that Cat with a "C" was reading it.

Yeah, well, you know,

methamphetamine’s and words don't really go together.

Ok-ay.

So, you, a lot of good stuff in here.

Yeah?

Is that code for start over?

No. Oh, my gosh, no, no, no.

That chapter where you tell the kids?

Ah! Heartstring City.

- Thank you. - And going back with Jake?

I loved... loved what you did there.

Thank you.

Ish.

Ish?

Can you be more specific?

Okay, sure, yeah, just a few notes here.

Oh, shit, do you believe this heat wave?

Since when did LA become the Middle East?

Right. Yeah, it's hot.

So, um, what are the notes?

Basically, um...

It's a lot of notes.

Um, yeah, just... Just dig deeper.

Give us more of the mess, the raw, gritty.

Gritty?

Gritty.

Hey, don't get defensive.

I'm just looking for my new Abby McCarthy.

A little less sunny, more authentic, real.

Right. You know what?

I am not... I'm not being defensive.

I just... isn't that what I did?

Well, kind of, but I mean, come on.

Where's Becca Riley?

I don't feel comfortable writing about that.

So change her name.

- And Harris? - Harris is in there.

Oh, okay, yes, you did it on a plane,

and you cried like a wittle tiny baby on a date.

It's your first serious relationship after Jake.

I mean, get inside of it.

Okay, I will get inside of it.

Could you maybe get inside fast, huh?

Kat, my deadline is already in a few weeks.

That's right, so hit that keyboard.

Go strike while the iron's hot.

Think I'm excited.

I think I'm excited.

I'm gonna go hit it.

I love when you draw me.

Makes me feel like Kate Winslet.

Who?

Kidding. I've seen "Titanic."

I'm not a... total weirdo.

Well, I am, but I've seen "Titanic."

Um, just... I have to move for one second.

_

Oh, shit!

I forgot.

Ralf is back from Berlin.

He has to pick up the kids.

Should I wake them?

Oh.

Honestly, JD, I think you should leave.

Or hide.

Meeting the ex is a lot.

You mean, for someone with my condition?

No, for anyone.

And stop talking about yourself like that.

You're fine.

We already went over this.

I am a weirdo with acute social anxiety,

but you make me feel like I can beat it.

Like I'm king of the world.

Wow. Nice.

Yeah. See? Told you I saw it.

So tell me more about this... Ralf.

Um, he owns hotels, self-made,

killer business instincts,

he's also a big player in the art world.

I think I hate him already.

No. He's not that bad.

He's into impressionists.

Total Monet guy.

Hmm, now I like him. What else?

Uh, he likes golf.

He's a foodie.

Loves going to new restaurants.

Monet, food, golf.

- Got it. - Got it.

It's beautiful.

You're beautiful.

- Jo. - Hey.

- Morning. - Hi.

- Hair looks nice. - Thank you.

Uh, we're running out of Faux-hos.

The natives are getting restless.

Yep, I'm whipping up a batch right now.

Great.

Is that a new top?

Huh?

Nope, just a regular old top.

Part of the regular rotation.

Wow. It looks very lovely.

Oh, coffee.

I am just brewing us a new batch of morning java

'cause I know that you are a dark roast kind of girl.

That's it. Put the mug down.

Did I, um... Did I do something wrong?

Enough of the befuddled Brit act, Hugh Grant.

When have you ever made me coffee?

Never, that's when.

You trying to be all gentlemanly

because of my weak moment the other night?

It wasn't weak. And you know,

maybe I'm just acting like a gentleman because...

You're not a gentleman. You're a slut.

That's your thing, so just quit it with the complements

and the smiling and the pity coffee.

If you ever do need to talk to anyone...

What did I just say? We're colleagues!

I am business, you're creative.

Capisce?

Don't think I understand what "capisce" really means, but yes.

I think I get your drift.

So how was Berlin?

Oh, the same.

Beautiful, thrilling, better than this crazy LA heat.

I know, it's been hot.

JD, this is Ralf. Ralf, this is JD.

Very nice to meet you, Ralf.

JD is an extremely talented new artist

that I've been working with.

Well, wonderful to meet you, JD.

An artist? What's your medium?

Paint.

I paint.

So, um, I hear you're a big food guy.

Have you tried that new Ethiopian restaurant on Fairfax?

Uh, I haven't tried it. Not yet.

Oh, but you must. It's so much deliciousness...

- Yeah. - And bread and, um...

Golf.

How about that Jordan Spieth?

He's a real ball-hitter.

Yeah.

- So where'd you find this guy? - You should see his art.

It's just... It's electric.

Aw, I don't know. Electric?

So, JD, have you shown your work yet?

Not yet. Still un-shown.

Yeah, we're still trying to get him a foothold,

but, uh, no luck.

Art galleries aren't really calling us back,

but, uh, we will... We will figure it out.

Yeah.

Well, uh, maybe I can stop by your studio, JD,

uh, take a look, offer you any advice that I can.

- Oh, wow. Thank you. - Oh, that would be amazing.

That's very nice of you.

I mean, if Phoebe responds so strongly,

I'm sure that I will too.

What happened to you?

You look like you walked into a car wash.

Back off. It's 7,000 degrees outside.

I'm Puerto Rican. I sweat.

My ass is so damp it feels like it's growing moss.

- Ugh. - Thank you.

What are we talking about?

Phoebe had an ex-husband/ new boyfriend encounter.

No, not allowed to say boyfriend yet.

He has to work for it.